All of us live in an imperfect world, and we all contribute, in various degrees, to its imperfections. In a way, most of us already acknowledge that the world is a noble yet dangerous place; full of wonder and beauty, but also of indifference and malice. For example, parents will try to protect their children in some fashion from the "real world."  Children are innocent, and the real world is a place where innocence can be lost. In essence, most of us acknowledge that this world is lacking and falls short of something greater- something it could be, but that it isn't.Values counseling seeks to move your life in the right direction, the direction that, once seen, deep down you know it is best, but that sometimes feels so impossible to achieve.

Values Based Counselors point the way in a unified direction

When values are arbitrary, a unified direction does not exist, ideals can be lost.

The Need for Values Based Counselors

When people see a counselor, they may be coming for something as simple as help with befriending a co-worker, or they may be on their final hope of a collapsing life, having utilized every ounce of remaining strength just to walk through the door. It is so important that the counselor be well grounded in solid moral values and principles, because all these people having such a wide scope of issues are all seeking the same thing: a better way. 

Imagine a man who's life is collapsing, his wife no longer loves him due to years of her being emotional neglected and she intends to leave him, in fact she is already in the process of it. He truly loves her deep down- where did he go so wrong? How can he fix this? (Sadly, he has no clue how his years of ignoring her emotional needs has caused her love to die.) He manages to convince her to see a counselor for help. She is reluctant but figures she will go, she at least owes him that. But after this, she is gone for good. Can you see how important it is that this man find the right counselor? He gets one shot...just one shot at finding a counselor who can peel off the layers that, over the years, have become hardened scaled armour, and bring hope for this dying marriage. What if the counselor he chose viewed marriage as merely a "piece of paper" with divorce as an easy out? What if he selected a therapist with a personal bias (or even worse, secret held radical beliefs) that may actually make things worse? Or a therapist who is simply motivated by profit, taking a client's money and rebooking them as much as possible? Or what if he brought his wife to a therapist who was so morally neutral, that anything and everything was "right" simply if the client felt it was right? Believe it, there are a lot of licensed therapists out there like that! Can you see how important the values of the counselor are to a situation like this? He could open a phone book and randomly select any therapist, but how wise is it to take your future, and stake it on the roll of dice? There are a lot of licensed therapists out there, and not all of them have the same beliefs about marriage. In fact, we ourselves have received emails from therapists who have flat out stated their opposition to the idea of saving marriages. This man desperately needs a counselor who is well grounded, and believes in marriage.

Values based counselling means that the counselor is always pointing to a better way, meeting the client where he or she is at, and guiding that person towards a higher place: a place of deeper truth, a place of greater meaning. Non-values oriented counseling will simply seek to return the client to a functional level, or simply at a place that is "best for them." Well in the example above what was "best for the wife" was divorce. Yet she may not realize, or even see, that there could be door for her that leads her to a joyful life with her husband. While we believe that all people have the capacity within them to change, that does not mean they can always see all the choices before them. Sometimes people are so heavily oppressed by their situation that they genuinely cannot see a way out, or are unable to discern the best possible path. This is where the values of the counselor are critical to effective therapy.

Values are the whispers of our conscience that show us those things in our lives that need to change, they help us understand not only the problems in our lives, but why they were problems. Without values, we are unable to identify destructive behaviors and patterns of thoughts that cause pain and brokenness. Values allow us to learn from the past, let things go, and illuminate a new path towards a brighter future. And while we may never actually reach the ideal, it is instead the journey towards it that holds the joy of living; that we live a life always walking forward, towards a better place, one that is full of hope, experiencing true freedom and purpose every step of the way.

I Don't Believe In Imposing Values On Clients

This is probably the #1 concern we hear from professionals who feel hesitant about a transparent values approach regarding counseling and therapy. This section is written for therapists, but if you are a client this discussion may give you more insight into the world "behind" therapy.

Most college textbooks will tell students of psychology to keep their values hidden to clients. This may have been true at one time, but with the vast use of the internet, it is a flawed premise based on a faulty assumption that clients are not pro-active in their mental health care. We will demonstrate why this philosophy of therapy is flawed with pro-active clients (it also should be stated that all clients who use the internet to find a therapist, are by definition, being pro-active in their mental health care). First lets define the difference between "hidden values" and "transparent values" therapy.

1. All therapists are human beings, and as human beings, all therapists also have a personal value system.

2. Therapists, the vast majority of them, do not compromise their own personal values in therapy.

If you are a therapist, both points are going to be true. Counselors, regardless of their personal values, are neither expected to, nor do they by by practice, compromise themselves in therapy. But does (a) having personal values, and (b) not compromising values equate to (c) imposing values? It does not. So lets assume two hypothetical therapists, Therapist A who believes strongly against imposing values in Therapy, and keeps his/her values hidden from the client, and Therapist B with transparent values. What is the difference between these two therapists? Well, both of them have a set of personal values. The only difference is that Therapist B has made his/her values transparent to the client upfront, before therapy even begins. Transparency is the only difference, nearly the exact opposite of imposing.

Hidden Values Are More Imposing

Because all clients who use the internet to find a therapist are being pro-active in their health care, we make the case that a therapist who tries to keep his or her values hidden is far closer to imposing on a client, than a therapist who has those values transparent. With transparent values, the client knows the values upfront, and then can make the choice to see....or not to see....a therapist before spending any money, and before investing any energy. With a "hidden values" therapist, the client has already spent money, and has already invested time, energy, and emotions into therapy. The values of the therapist then "leak" into therapy over time, and the client discovers, over time, that the therapist's values are polar opposite, and the client may feel defeated and give up counseling or go back to the search for a new therapist.

Which scenario is better for a client:

A) Client reads the transparent values of a therapist. The values of the therapist are against the values of the client. The client avoids making contact with that therapist, and finds another.

B) Client contacts a therapist whose values are "hidden." There is no obvious conflict of values, client makes an appointment. Client invests money, time and energy into therapy, and only later learns, over the course of therapy, that the therapist has strong activist opinions in direct opposition to their personal beliefs.

In Scenario A, the client was empowered. The client had information about the therapist, and avoided spending money and energy on ineffective therapy. In Scenario B, the client only discovered, over the course of paid therapy, that he/she could not have the kind of beneficial relationship with the therapist because of a deep chasm in personal a value system. Scenario B is far more imposing on a client, than scenario A.

A Caution to "Hidden Values" Therapists:

Therapy doesn't always work. This is true. What is also true is that for many clients, they will find one therapist very effective, and another one disappointing. You can see this today on the internet, even in Google, where therapists are "rated and reviewed" with 1-4 stars like a hotel or a restaurant. This may seem unfortunate, but it is simply the reality now. A therapist who provides ineffective counseling may find themselves "rated" on the internet for other potential clients to see. While browsing Google maps, for example, we have seen numerous therapists and psychologists that have public reviews under their names, with ratings of 1 to 4 stars, and we are quite confident many therapists don't even realize it. The question that should be asked is, "What are some ways to make therapy more effective?" We believe strongly that one way is having transparent values. Gone are the days when clients had little choice in what therapist to see or not to see. You must ask yourself, What is the real benefit behind "hiding" your values to a client? We can find little benefit, except in the case where a client has no choice but to see a particular therapist (which is not common, however in that case you could make a good argument in hiding values). In the age of the internet, however, clients do have a choice, and they are very active in their choice of a therapist, taking their selection into their own hands. We have seen this time and time again, you could commission a scientific study and we are confident the results would be resounding: clients prefer to select a therapist who is the best match for their situation and personal values.

The old days of people making an appointment blind with a psychotherapist whom they know nothing about other than a name with letters, or a listing in a phonebook are nearly over. Clients want to read profiles, they want to know about their therapist prior to making an appointment. This may go against the grain of textbook psychology, but the rapidly changing world has crafted a new playing field when it comes to the venue of choosing a psychotherapist. We believe the success rate of therapy increases when clients feel an immediate rapport with their therapist - prior to even booking a session - simply because they relate to, and embrace the values of the therapist. For today's internet savvy client, the best match is a therapist who has the proper training and experience in the area of help they need and personal values in harmony with them. People do prefer a therapist who shares their values, just ask them. To know the values of a therapist up-front before making any investment empowers clients, and empowering clients is what therapy is all about.

Have feedback about our values? Please Let Us Know Here - We are very interested in what clients and counselors both think of our values and mission.

To learn more about our approach to counseling, read about the road of therapy-discovery-results-life

On Values and Ethics: The field of counseling and psychology is regulated by official bodies, including the regulation of ethics in practice. Values counseling is not a replacement of professional ethics and is something different entirely. Learn more about ethics and values here.