In terms of managing your anger, it is important to understand that anger is often the minds' way of protecting you, or of defending you from something. Often, people feel as if they have been a victim of something, and then they will act out in anger because they feel as if they need to protect themselves. If you understand why, it may be easier to get past the point of simply having outbursts.

I see lots of angry teenagers. They disrespect parents and teachers, punch holes in walls, say mean things to siblings, refuse to help out around the house, or are surly and sarcastic and make everyone walk on eggshells around them. Anger management works fine if the person wants to manage their anger, but most of the angry teens brought to my office have no interest in managing their anger—they want people to know they're angry because that's the only way they feel their message will be heard. I help these kids find other ways to express themselves, and help parents hear and appreciate the message—even while disagreeing with it—so that the "heat" leaves, allowing for genuine discussion.