Anger Management and Counselling in Victoria, BC.

Anger, like other emotions, helps us to respond to our experiences and to meet our needs. However, we can get into trouble in our relationships and with the law if we express our anger inappropriately. Anger may be used to control others by frightening them. Anger can be destructive and can make us physically unwell. In anger management counseling we will try to identify the triggers to your anger and I will coach you in methods of appropriate anger release. To understand the pattern of your anger and where your anger comes from we will look at the story of your life from your earliest memory. With better control of your reactions when you are upset you will be much happier and healthier.

Anger is a natural human response and perhaps the most misunderstood emotion. It can both serve and protect us - but left unchecked, it can lead to serious problems – damaging relationships, jeopardizing careers, and leaving us feeling out of control. Many of us were never taught what to do with anger, aside from bottling it up or acting it out. But there is another way. In my work, I help people to develop insight into the roots of their relationship with anger, and learn skills to authentically express it. Anger is often compared with fire, and as the saying goes, ‘fire is a good servant but a bad master.’ Together, we can work toward getting the fire under control.

Anger and violence are wildly misunderstood issues. I believe that it is important to explore the context in which the anger or violence occurs. For example, does it happen at home, or at work, or in public? Who is impacted by the anger or violence? How do the individuals who are impacted resist and respond to the anger/violence? Through counselling we will explore the context of the interactions. Once we understand the context (who is doing what to who?) I will respectfully invite responsibility taking and strategies for more helpful communication and responses.

Anger is an emotion that can be necessary to protect yourself in life threatening situations or when being treated in hurtful and harmful ways. Yet other times, underlying emotions or misunderstandings may be causing your anger. Your emotions are natural and normal, but you may be acting on them or acting out because of them. In these times, anger can be destructive and alienate you from significant people and life opportunities that you desire. Learning about anger, developing strategies to manage anger and exploring the other emotions and causes of your anger, are ways that we can work together to manage anger.

Unmanaged anger can interfere with your relationships, your self esteem, and your job. With gentle support and challenge I will help you explore the root of your anger, the belief systems that support your behaviours, and how you can recognize your anger before it becomes translated into acting out. Using self regulation skills, self awareness, and mindfulness skills, you will learn that you have choices in how you recognize and express your feelings. Anger can be a healthy emotion, but can also be destructive when it takes over.

Anger is a normal, natural response to perceived threats. Learning to manage our anger can be difficult at times. You will want to seek help with your anger if it seems uncontrollable, causes hurt or regret, or is impacting your relationships. Working together, we can collaboratively explore what your anger looks like, what triggers you and the signs that your anger is building. We can learn how to work with your frustration and anger in healthy ways.

It sucks to be angry and loose control of our emotions. Anger can have a devastating impact on the people we love the most. I will support you in addressing the emotions, trauma and pain underneath anger and learn to identify your triggers and patterns. I will teach you tools to address your stress and help you learn to better deal with your emotions. Learning to communicate our needs in a way that will be received is also a part of how I address anger issues.

Anger often stems from feeling so many emotions all at once. You lose a sense of control. You go from 0 to 100 in a blink of an eye. By getting angry you’re attempting to regain control that’s presumed lost. But instead, you’re full of guilt and shame. Feeling angry and reacting in anger, is simply exhausting. I’ll help you learn how to regain control, in a healthy way.

I don't focus on symptoms; I don't much care about them because they come and go as needed. People who are angry have good reason, and that's where the issues lie. Anger comes from many causes, and being ignored and abused is most common. There is misunderstanding, disconnection, and ignorance. The first step in controlling anger is getting control of one's life, getting the emotional necessities. What's most often missing is love which, for many people, is entirely missing from their lives. To overcome anger, bring into your life things you deeply appreciate. To remove the symptom, address the cause. Much of the frustration lies in securing basic needs. Things need to be put in order.

Anger is our strong feeling of annoyance or displeasure when something doesn’t go our way. The reasons we get angry can be perfectly plain – or they can be a mystery. Anger can also become a habit, a stance we hold. Life puts us in difficult situations – anger may be an understandable response to your situation. But you can develop some choices about how you respond. I work with people to identify what sets them off, and to find ways to redirect situations and feelings. Do you turn your anger outwards or inwards? We consider the factors involved (relationship, family issues, life stress, job, habits, etc.), and figure out what needs to change to let you live with more satisfaction.

Anger is a very misunderstood emotion. The feeling of anger can tell us important things about ourselves, about the situations we are facing, and about the people with whom we are in relationship. I will help you better understand your feelings of anger, to manage your response to them, and to behave in constructive ways to change situations that continue to be destructive.

Anger is ultimately a healthy emotion that can be an adaptive and appropriate response to our circumstances. It can let us know what we need and be a helpful guide in taking positive and proactive actions. Yet, in some cases it can control and motivate us to take actions we regret or that lead to negative consequences. Developing an empowering relationship with anger is a skill that can be learned. In order to do so, our individual contexts need to be considered—our personalities, values, life histories, and underlying psychologies. There is no one size fits all approach. Anger can fulfill different functions in each of our lives.

If you're struggling with anger management, our team of Registered Clinical Counsellors can help! Your counsellor can help you identify your triggers, understand what is happening in your anger cycle, learn to slow down your reactivity, improve your communication skills, develop strategies you can use when you are feeling angry, and how you might repair relationships that have been damaged as a result of anger outbursts. Even if you avoid anger outbursts, instead keeping the anger bottled up inside you, anger management counselling with Gravitate Counselling Inc. can help.

I am honoured that you are interested in my services and I would like to tell you a little bit about myself. I have been described as slightly non-conventional in the counselling world, which suits me perfectly, and also tends to suit youth who are trying to stand up to the force of the problems in their life. I am very comfortable working with this population, and I feel fortunate that I can connect with teens the way I do, conventionally or in a way that makes sense to them.

Dr. Sloat's approach to Anger Management is twofold. She provides tools and strategies for use when you are actually in the throes of anger. And, she helps you look at the big picture as well. The best way to manage your anger is to have nothing to be angry about. Dr. Sloat's therapeutic methods help you get at the source of your anger so that you can better manage it.

Anger can feel like a sudden and overwhelming force within us or it can be experienced as a persistent, festering feeling that never seems to go away. Often anger is an indication of unmet needs that can stem from as far back as early childhood. I provide a space to explore these hidden emotions and needs within and offer practical tools and strategies for managing anger productively.

Grey Matters International and the work of Kevin J. Fleming, Ph.D approaches issues of anger management in a very humane yet fresh perspective. You see, anger is a normal emotion but it is the valence (intensity) as well as the coupling choice of what one does with this that is the problem. Telling someone to "not" do it or modifying behavior with a trite psychological plan that only breeds a compliant response is not the way to change anger. Brainwave optimization is a new cutting edge technology that allows one to rewire circuitry responsible for reactivity driving the anger. Contact Grey Matters International, Inc now at kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161.

You did it again. You lost your cool and you blew up. And this time, the consequences are serious. Your job is at risk, your family is hurt, or your partner has finally said, “this is it.” But for some reason, you just can’t seem to stop it. One minute you’re fine, then BOOM – 0 to 100. Know this: there is a path to change. Using evidence-based and cutting-edge techniques, I can help you: cool down from intense stress, communicate with others in a way that inspires both love AND respect, catch anger-flare-ups (before they happen), and have healthy outlets for when they do. Together let's keep your relationships, career, and emotions in harmony. There is an answer to anger.

Isn't it interesting how anger can motivate us and make us stuck all at the same time? Study the anatomy of anger in order to learn how to control it and use it in healthy ways. Anger is not "bad"; it is an essential emotion. Learn how to choose what to do with your anger in order to let it do it's job and then be let go. Explore what also masquerades as anger!

The more you feel out of control in your life, the more likely you are to feel angry. Unless you can identify and share your sense of powerlessness. This often takes a retraining of values but leads to personal empowerment once you learn that you can have "power with" rather than "power over" another person. There are a number of techniques to promote postiive changes fairly quickly including the recognition of one's negative self-talk and replacing it with self-soothing inside,