Great Couples Counseling in Cheviot Hills, CA. Therapy to heal relationships.

Is your relationship in need of healing and strengthening for increased connection? Are you not even sure you want to be in the relationship and need a safe space to explore it? I'm a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and a certified Prepare-Enrich Couples Counselor and offer professional couples counseling, premarital counseling, and marital couples counseling. I utilize effective communication skills, Attachment Theory, Family Systems, and Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy to help restore your emotional bond and intimacy. Take the first step towards a fulfilling and lasting relationship and I look forward to working together with you!

All couples will face challenges. Let's face it, it's hard to live with another person. Some conflict is healthy and normal. But when it seems like you're arguing all the time, feeling negative about your partner, or feeling disrespected, it is time for help. I will teach you positive communication techniques, ways to feel like a team again, and regain the love in your relationship.

Our staff of over 25 therapists specializes in helping couples in distress. From pre-marital counseling to couples work and even marriages that have been together for years--we are ready to help. Our staff has received training from Dr. Susan Johnson, the international expert on marriage and couples therapy and can help couples get free from patterns of fighting that you can't get out of on your own. We can teach you how to get free from the gridlock of fruitless fighting, and learn how to thrive in your relationship again.

Is this you? All we do is fight! It seems like we never hear each other and neither of us listens anymore! It is so frustrating I do not want to come home and try. I have been successfully helping couples to develop the tools necessary to communicate effectively for more than 20 years. Having disagreements is not unusual. Learning how to resolve disagreements is a key element to healthy relationships. Conflict resolution is about learning to fight fairly by listening in an atmosphere of Respect, Trust, Safety and love and not placing my desire to be right over the relationship.

Over the years, the couples change. The spark, the feeling you have around each other--it changes. Every couple is different, but simply put, I help couples experience more connection and meaning in their relationships. Together with your partner I will help you navigate conflict, communicate in a deeper way, build connection (emotionally, spiritually, and sexually). I work with the couples ranging from never having been in therapist's office to couples who have "done couples therapy before", wherever you find yourselves--I'm here to help. Contact me today and let's see how we can get you and your relationship to a better place.

I provide couples counseling, marriage counseling, pre-marital and blended family couples counseling. I use Gottman principals and emotional focused therapy approaches in helping you build stronger connections, foster effective communication, and overall create lives built and aligned together. For those that would like Christian couples counseling we will integrate biblical principals alongside therapeutic interventions.

Couple relationships are the source of our greatest joy, fulfillment, frustration, fear, and hopes. When they go well, there is nothing better. When the go wrong they are the source of intense emotional pain. Did you know that there is significant, reliable research that informs what builds and what can unravel even the most loving relationships? We have this knowledge and can share it with you in a safe, caring, and confidential environment. It is possible to make your good relationship great and your hurting relationship whole again.

Are you and your partner arguing more often than usual? Feel your relationship is not what it used to be? A relationship goes through ebbs and flows and sometimes cannot get back on track. I work with couples who are having difficulties in their relationship and help them put words to the way they are feeling without all the drama, fighting, or misunderstandings. I provide a safe environment for both sides to speak about what they want and have the other person listen without feeling shut down before they start. Get the tools your relationship needs to have better understanding and appreciation for the other person. Call for a free, confidential consultation today.

Why do we seem to have the same arguments over and over again? How do I know if we are really supposed to be together? Are there things we could be doing to better support each other, to help each other grow and be our best selves? If we really love each other, why do we so often hurt each other? How do I know if this is real love, anyway? Relationships are hard. Even more than desire, they require effort and understanding to make them work. Often, even if two people really love each other, one or both may need help to maintain the right effort or understanding to keep the balance necessary for long-term success. Having outside, objective support can make all the difference.

Many couples present in distress with a strong desire to enhance their relationships. I like to work with communication styles as well as explore some old patterns of relating that may have their history in early childhood experiences with their own families. Being able to identify these old patterns of relating to a significant other can help couples to understand why they bring these old patterns into their current relationship. After these patterns are identified, new ways of relating and communicating are explored and practiced. Listening skills and acceptance are important areas of exploration throughout therapy as well. Couples find new & satisfying ways of relating with each other.

Couples therapy should not be about hashing over old wounds. Getting what you want from a relationship involves good communication and active listening, tolerance and forgiveness, emotional intelligence, having common goals and working cooperatively and, like all the bets things in life, presents us with a challenge. Relationships can be hard work but the work is rewarding and life-enhancing. I love to work with couples who are committed to improving their future rather than reliving their past.

How do you rate your partner? Do you just KNOW your relationship could be better? With Kevin Bergen, you'll find a specialist who can get you over your hurdles to relationship bliss. Are you tired of arguing? Is trust a problem now? Has one of you checked out of the relationship? Feeling alone or more like roommates? Kevin understands what you're feeling. He understands each of you equally, he'll affirm you when your partner is off track, and kick your butt when it's you who's out of line. If you want understanding and honesty, call Kevin for your couple's needs.

Therapy offers a supportive environment where you can communicate in a safe way... learn to calm down, listen and validate the other person... become more aware of each other's over-reactions and vulnerabilities... understand each other's needs... clarify commonalities and differences in your relationship goals... negotiate, accept and move on to a better emotional state. By understanding and empathizing with both of you, I can provide you with insights, exercises and concrete skills to help you transform your relationship into a lasting source of love and companionship... or find the courage to end what cannot be repaired.

Married, dating, heterosexual, gay, or bisexual? I specialize in emotional intimacy, sex, addiction, and trauma, any of which can derail a relationship. You can heal your relationship or end it. I can help either way. Improve communication and handle conflicts better. Get your emotional baggage out of the way so it doesn’t hurt your relationship. Better for the couple and especially better when there are kids. Have kids and you’re divorcing? You’re still tied together. We can make that less damaging for everyone. Kids do better when their divorced parents work together for the kids’ best interest – dealing with emotions and communication better and not putting kids in the middle.

I believe contemporary clinicians & authors like Esther Perel and John Gottman have made significant, sensible, and accessible contributions to Couples Counseling. I find value in their philosophies and methods and weave them into my work with couples when appropriate. At a very basic level, I think couples frequently suffer from a perception problem. They think they know how their partner is thinking and feeling but in reality that is just a projection of their own imagination. Helping couples recognize this is an important aspect of our early work together. A deeper level of work includes helping couples identify and work through the unconscious motivations that drive their behavior.

What are the most common couples' issues? If you are thinking "communication, conflict, sex, money, child rearing" you are correct. However, most therapists will go after the symptom on each side of the couple fence thinking that the way to effective change is by getting each party to "work" on their respective "issue". Many times the parties don’t agree but comply. Imagine if you could align the unconscious brains of a couple and stop the "working on your issues" part that has become so popular in therapy settings? Contact kevin@kevinflemingphd.com to learn how! Or call 877-606-6161. DR. FLEMING'S NEW RELATIONSHIP/COUPLES INTENSIVES. www.kevinflemingphd.com/marriage-couples-retreats.php

Is your perception of your partner one that brings you calmness and strength, or agitation and fear? I help couples to remember their forgotten longing. As partners, we need to be responsible for the type of energy we bring into the relationship. Through counseling, I help couples change their emotional negativity, in whatever form it takes, by focusing on extreme compassion for your partner's issues. Catch your relationship before it feels beyond fixable.

Couples struggling with repeated conflict, emotional injuries, and feelings of loneliness will find solace and rejuvenation in the therapy process. My approach to couples counseling is centered on healing attachment wounds and fostering a deeper connection between partners. By creating a compassionate and non-judgmental space, I guide couples in uncovering the underlying emotions that have led to the disconnection. Together, we will work to develop effective communication skills, rebuild trust, and cultivate empathy. You will experience relief from past hurts and discover new pathways to improved relational functioning, leading to a more satisfying and harmonious partnership.

What are the most common couples' issues? If you are thinking "communication, conflict, sex, money, child rearing" you are correct. However, most therapists will go after the symptom on each side of the couple fence thinking that the way to effective change is by getting each party to "work" on their respective "issue". Many times the parties dont agree but comply. Imagine if you could align the unconscious brains of a couple and stop the "working on your issues" part that has become so popular in therapy settings? Contact kevin@kevinflemingphd.com to learn how! Or call 877-606-6161 DR. FLEMING'S NEW RELATIONSHIP/COUPLES INTENSIVES www.kevinflemingphd.com/marriage-couples-retreats.php

Is your relationship full of miss-communications or missed opportunities to reconnect? Have you experienced a traumatic event that has thrown each of you into isolation? Situations can happen which cause you to develop negative communication patterns and extreme misunderstandings. You did not come together to live alone. If you have been settling for living together as roommates, it may be time to reach out for professional help. Relationships can become distressed, or simply just get stuck. Cindy is here to listen, partner with you, and create a treatment plan specific to your needs. Couples counseling is tough work. If you are ready - I'm here to help and partner with you through it all. Come, begin your journey back in to the relationship you...(view profile to read more)

The goal is to use creative tools and assessments to help you grow as a couple. Here to help you improve your communication, connect and build a stronger foundation. Couple's therapy is a path to understanding each other's needs, learning the best way to listen to your partner and finding effective ways to communicate. Strengthening the couple's foundation will help build a stronger family unit.

I help couples in ambivalence, individuals recovering from past relationship or attachment wounds, and spouses or family members of addicted loved ones. Transform your marriage with deep connection. I help couples understand each other, heal individual wounds, and fostering a closeness like never before. I am trained in Gottman Method Couples Counseling, Emotional Focused Therapy, and IFS for couples.

Are you struggling with your relationship? It is important to understand that is is more than just having good communication skills. That can help, but the real part of making a relationship work is understanding how your partner connects. A great relationship thrives when couples know how to respond to each other in the way the each need based on their attachment styles. I can help your relationship grow by helping you respond both physically and emotionally to your partner in they way they need it and in the way you need it to feel understood, safe, and connected.

My approach is to help each partner see clearly where s/he stands, what s/he stands for, and what meaning the relationship holds. How do these values come into play in the relationship? How do our own expectations, and those of society at large, influence the relationship? Often, understanding the role of a relationship in our own lives reveals possible ways forward. Sometimes, it shows us that moving forward might not be what we want to do.

Relationships are the stuff of life and wise persons will attend carefully to their intimate, committed relationship. Most couples are not aware of the sources of conflict and how these sources impact their relationships. Most couples do not understand how their coping habits, learned the child and teen years, will actually interfere with success in their love relationship. Couples all need to learn new and better ways to cope with relationships pain as their old coping habits will not work -- they will end up unintentionally hurting their partner.