Anger Management and Counselling in Comox, BC.

Anger is called a secondary emotion, brought on by a triggering event and or thought. What I'm interested in was a therapist, is what is behind the trigger. What are the fears, the needs that aren't being met. By identifying different triggers, and the the triggering thoughts behind them, we can depersonalize a situation so that it simply becomes a problem to be solved, without fault or blame, and discover alternative thoughts and behaviours that lead a path to better choices, without shame or guilt.

When anger gets the best of us, we can say and/or do things that we later wish we could change or take back. Anger is an instinctive universal emotion, one in which we all have, but not all expressions of anger have to be hurt. In fact, anger works as a great informant and can motivate us to take action to improve our own lives and the lives of people that we care about.

Anger is an emotion that we all have experienced – it is natural, normal and healthy. However if it gets to be too much it can become destructive and damaging to those around us and ourselves. It can lead to problems in our personal lives as well as at work and play. How we express our anger can be the key to learning to better manage our angry emotions. Anger is a biological reaction and yet we can learn to manage it better. We can learn to express what we are feeling and to use various calming strategies that help us to identify our triggers and learn to control our reactions. The benefits to learning manage our anger are endless and often life transforming.

Grey Matters International and the work of Kevin J. Fleming, Ph.D approaches issues of anger management in a very humane yet fresh perspective. You see, anger is a normal emotion but it is the valence (intensity) as well as the coupling choice of what one does with this that is the problem. Telling someone to "not" do it or modifying behavior with a trite psychological plan that only breeds a compliant response is not the way to change anger. Brainwave optimization is a new cutting edge technology that allows one to rewire circuitry responsible for reactivity driving the anger. Contact Grey Matters International, Inc now at kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161.

Anger is generally masking other feelings beneath it. By exploring our family dynamics and history we can come to an understanding of the underlying feelings that trigger our anger and the thought processes and inner narrative we've built around it. I use an MCBT approach to facilitate this process. Enabling people time to think about consequences and their emotional triggers before reacting is part of my process.

It sucks to be angry and loose control of our emotions. Anger can have a devastating impact on the people we love the most. I will support you in addressing the emotions, trauma and pain underneath anger and learn to identify your triggers and patterns. I will teach you tools to address your stress and help you learn to better deal with your emotions. Learning to communicate our needs in a way that will be received is also a part of how I address anger issues.

Anger can often feel so overwhelming that it causes you to do things you later regret. Not knowing what came over you, there are many unanswered questions: why do I keep doing this? why can't I stop myself? Sometimes, alcohol, substances, or other addictive behaviours lead to this anger, making it more difficult to control. As an addiction counsellor, I help clients overcome addictions leading to anger issues so they can regain a sense of control, rebuild relationships, and gain clarity about how to move forward. If you are unsure where to start, send me a message and I can help. If I'm not the right fit, I can connect you to the right support so you can start gaining back control, today.

We work with individuals who want to work on and take accountability for their anger and violence. We offer a dignity informed approach to understand and offer insight and support in issues of anger and violence. Our hope is to delve into the context and history of the individual and determine what is happening in the anger and violence and help with accountability and different choices around the anger and violence.