Great Couples Counseling in Castro Valley, CA. Therapy to heal relationships.

Discover how you can go from rejected to connected! Did you know the reactivity you experience is not your fault? (This is one of the main things that causes fights and arguments. It's when you feel out of control, & it leads to doing or saying things you regret, impulsivity, & leads to hurt & separation). I show couples how they can reduce the personal & relational reactivity they experience & increase feeling peaceful, calm, understood, validated, safe, accepted, & connected. I help couples discover their attachment strategies (how we feel safe & get our needs met). This is necessary in order to create lasting improvement, safety, trust, understanding, & connection, in your relationship.

Why do we seem to have the same arguments over and over again? How do I know if we are really supposed to be together? Are there things we could be doing to better support each other, to help each other grow and be our best selves? If we really love each other, why do we so often hurt each other? How do I know if this is real love, anyway? Relationships are hard. Even more than desire, they require effort and understanding to make them work. Often, even if two people really love each other, one or both may need help to maintain the right effort or understanding to keep the balance necessary for long-term success. Having outside, objective support can make all the difference.

Couples seek therapy for many reasons and at different stages of their lives, even when they are not experiencing overt difficulties. Some seek psychotherapy to become more intimate, to develop new capacities as a couple, to mediate conflicts before they become intractable or to prepare for the next phase in their journey together. Some come entrenched by long-standing difficulties that have subsumed their lives. Others come with doubts about their future, seeking clarity about their path, or needing help to navigate life's inevitable challenges. Most come seeking a greater sense of hope and possibility for their lives together. If you are seeking support for your relationship, I can help.

Being in a relationship can be like the sun after a two-week downpour of rain, but it can also be like falling into a rosebush, something that looked pretty at first, but stuck you with a thousand thorns as you fell into it. Couples therapy can help you sort out the sticky mess of intimacy so that you can better roll with the punches, talk through problems, and enjoy all those amazing moments together in-between.

There are countless models of healthy romantic relationships, from monogamous to polyamorous, and unique variations between partners. The scripts for dating and longterm relationships of our parents’ generations may not be applicable to your relationship, and there is no formal education in how to be a good partner or how to identify unhealthy relationships. But there is psychological research that shows that effective communication, emotional openness, intimacy, and other factors contribute to healthy relationships. Creating these conditions are skills that can be learned. I practice brief humanistic and emotion-focused therapy (EFT) to help my LGBTQ and hetero clients learn these skills.

I focus on authenticity in my practice, and for me this is especially helpful when it comes to couples work. That most problems in relationships come from people being afraid to fully reveal themselves to their partners, for fear they won't be fully accepted and loved. And that by working on open and honest communication tools, and how to really share the depth of their beings with each other, we can create relationships of real intimacy that are healthy and nourishing.

Relationships are hard. We need to acknowledge that, then address issues specific to your relationship. The most critical needs of any relationship are trust and friendship. I work to bring those into the relationship and find ways to foster them to make them prevalent over conflicts and everyday struggles. Communication is often the presenting issue with couples, however, IF an underlying warmth is present, conflicts are addressed and managed in a gentler, more loving manner. Couples need to find shared meaning in their lives and become each others' refuge. I explore with you desires, dreams, regrets, wants, etc.. Call me today and begin the journey back to your passion / friendship.

Intimate partnerships provide miraculous opportunities to heal and grow. In couples therapy I create a safe space to build deep and lasting transformation with improved communication and mutual empathy. My approach is integrative and includes Emotionally Focused Therapy, Somatic Experiencing, Internal Family Systems, attachment theory modalities, sex therapy, and intuition. I am direct, compassionate, poly/ENM friendly, queer allied, and sex-worker allied. All are welcome here!

Are you trapped in destructive cycles of anger and blame? Have you lost trust because of an affair? Are you avoiding your partner or feeling disengaged? Is it hard for you to have real conversations or solve problems together? I will help you untangle your painful negative cycles of communication and build new stronger connections. You can learn to have power over that cycle by learning your triggers and undoing them. You will learn about the roots of the cycle learned in early relationships. Call, text or email me to set an appointment.

What are the most common couples' issues? If you are thinking "communication, conflict, sex, money, child rearing" you are correct. However, most therapists will go after the symptom on each side of the couple fence thinking that the way to effective change is by getting each party to "work" on their respective "issue". Many times the parties don’t agree but comply. Imagine if you could align the unconscious brains of a couple and stop the "working on your issues" part that has become so popular in therapy settings? Contact kevin@kevinflemingphd.com to learn how! Or call 877-606-6161. DR. FLEMING'S NEW RELATIONSHIP/COUPLES INTENSIVES. www.kevinflemingphd.com/marriage-couples-retreats.php

Couples counseling is helpful when two individuals want to deepen their connection (even when things in their relationship are "fine") as well as to help resolve conflicts that have not been addressed or have not been successfully addressed in the past. Top concerns usally involve money, parenting, sex, and in-laws. Improving general communication and one's ability to manage their feelings help to resolve the issues above with love, respect, and efficiency.

It really hurts when the person you love is focused on "being right", rather than really getting you! Does your relationship create a deep pain or numbness in your heart? When we start to believe that our LEGITIMATE needs for connection will not be adequately met with our partner, it is easy to focus on our personal needs (at the expense of our partner's). A NORMAL human response to this is: nagging, petty repetitive fights, silent-treatments, numbing out, outbursts, being condescending, focusing on being right (rather than really listening). Using EFT, I FOCUS ON SHIFTING THE CULTURE OF YOUR RELATIONSHIP from its current negative painful cycles into being a safe place for both of you.

FREE 30 zoom call - text/call 510-335-5222. Couples therapy lights me up! Not feeling heard, understood, valued or supported? Toxic conflict? Withdrawing? Longing for help? Utilizing research-backed EFT & powerful tools from PACT, NVC, & IFS, I help couples create a secure bond & safe haven with each other. You'll learn to trust, support, hear & "be there" for each other. Discover your attachment styles & learn about the brain & nervous system, survival parts and trauma that may be damaging your relationship. Develop self-awareness, accountabiity & WE instead of just ME mentality. Turn towards each other instead of away with authenticity, compassion, attunement & understanding.

I help couples move their relationship forward through difficult times, into a place of support, love, and mutual understanding. As a psychologist with over a decade of experience working with couples, I have built up considerable respect for the concept of multiple points of view. The benefit of couples therapy is that you have a therapist who is on your relationship's side. Too often what one partner intends to convey, is not how it is received by the other. I am particularly skilled at helping partners phrase and ask for things in ways that the other person can hear and digest. I am happy to speak with you over the phone for a free initial consultation. Give me a call today!

Couples counseling has been a passion of mine and one of my top two specialties for 15 years now. I blend Imago, Emotionally focused, and Gottman techniques into a process I call "Conscious Love." Conscious Love is based on the concept that we tend to come together with a romantic partner who will trigger our core wound and bring our attention to where we need healing. It's an opportunity to learn how to become a team to overcome the patterns that are blocking the flow of love between you. This is a beautiful process blending mindfulness techniques, inner healing/soul work, and a powerful communication method I call “nurturing talks.” Feel free to read the testimonials on my website.

Would you like to create a more loving, fulfilling relationship as a couple? Couple's counseling is a great way to invest in your relationship and get to know yourself and your partner more deeply. I use a strengths-based approach with couples, looking at what drew you together, what is working well in your relationship and how you can leverage your loving feelings to create a strong, lasting relationship.

Without conflict, couples do not achieve intimacy. The challenge is helping you and your partner learn how to have healthy conflict that leads to intimacy, rather than destructive conflict that destroys the relationship. I specialize in working with affairs and broken trust, abgtneuro-diverse couples. I usually start with helping you learn ground rules for being able to have safe, constructive, healthy conflict to reduce and eliminate destructive relational patterns. I also use Emotion Focused Therapy (EFT) to help you reconnect, learn healthy communication skills, rekindle the flame that you once had, and start talking to each other again. If you are willing to work, I am here for you

I teach couples constructive paths through the inevitable relationship conflicts and challenges we all experience. By coaching them through the researched base principals and practices for creating successful relationships, I support them in achieving their goals of creating loving companionship and respect for themselves and for each other. And as a couple embodies these relationships tools they become empowered to prevent or work through most relationship challenges going forward.

Many of the couples I see come to me for the following reasons: they have become more like roommates rather than a romantic couple, inability to trust one another, jealousy in the relationship, unfulfilling sexual or emotional intimacy, intense yelling and arguing, general dissatisfaction, an episode of infidelity, navigating divorce or separation. It can feel both hopeful and scary for couples to explore these issues in their relationship. Our work will explore why your relationship is exhibiting its pattern, give you tips and strategies to abate and extinguish unhealthy cycles, and achieve and maintain the relationship you want.

Are you trapped in a cycle of relentless arguments, grappling with trust issues, communication breakdowns, or a lack of emotional intimacy that feels like you are just roommates? Amid life's demands, couples often feel overwhelmed, losing sight of the deep connection that initially brought them together. The Gottman Method, grounded in decades of research, is highly effective in helping couples achieve lasting positive change. I offer a complimentary 15-minute consultation for you to get to know me and ask any questions. With over a decade as a tenured professor in the counseling field, I bring a wealth of experience and a enthusiastic about applying these insights with you.

Do you and your loved one seem to be moving farther and father apart? Do you notice that you are arguing more, feeling more distant, or feeling cut off completely from this person that you had once found so much joy in? The relationship with a significant other is one of the most profound that you will ever experience. It is responsible for keeping us centered emotionally in stressful times, and it is responsible for helping us to feel joy and connection in the world. Learn to communicate with your partner and how to get your needs met and figure out the primary needs of your partner. Rebuild trust and friendship and learn skills and tools to avoid the biggest relationship killers!

Is your perception of your partner one that brings you calmness and strength, or agitation and fear? I help couples to remember their forgotten longing. As partners, we need to be responsible for the type of energy we bring into the relationship. Through counseling, I help couples change their emotional negativity, in whatever form it takes, by focusing on extreme compassion for your partner's issues. Catch your relationship before it feels beyond fixable.

Loving, successful relationships need to be carefully and skillfully nurtured in the following five areas: Emotional, Intellectual, Spiritual, Sexual, Financial. Couples who are ready to do ongoing work on their relationships are richly rewarded with a loving, meaningful and joyful life together. Committed relationships that have the possibility of morphing into long term relationships benefit greatly by being guided by the Gottman research on relationships as well as Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT). Premarital Counselling prepares a couple for a new stage in their relationship by identifying potential areas of conflict and strength and developing tools to create a strong foundation.

I work with couples to repair and rebuild their relationships. My practice focuses on providing couples with the tools they need to create a healthier and more connected relationship. I believe in an integrative approach that is rooted in evidence-based therapies such as Emotionally Focused Therapy, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, and Psychodynamic Therapy. My goal is to help couples find a deeper understanding of one another and create a more meaningful relationship. I strive to provide a safe, non-judgmental, and respectful environment that encourages honest communication and healing.

I provide couples counseling which can be beneficial whether you are married or in a long term partnership. Therapy can be helpful for all couples to open up communication, gain mutual understanding and have a safe place to be vulnerable. Engaging in couples therapy can valuable whether there is a specific issue needing focus or just the desire to gain better communication. I look forward to supporting through with this process.