Family Counselling Services in Langford, BC.

I guide families using the information and insights from extensive studies and my own experience. If your family is hurting and whatever you have been trying doesn’t help, if it feels like you can’t win, respect has disappeared, understanding and patience are gone; your family will benefit from bringing in a professional outsider. A family is a dynamic system. Being busy with our day to day struggles, it is easy to miss what another person needs. Timing and taking into account each members' experience is crucial to reconnect. With patience and tenacity, and taking the time to clarify and learn, you can resolve what may seem a hopeless situation.

I believe that we are all profoundly shaped and impacted by our family systems and larger social context. From this perspective I do not believe that "problems" are solely located within the individual. I believe they are impacted by our family system within a social context. In family therapy, we will explore the "problem" and how it is impacting the family system. For example, how are the family members affected by the "problems" and how are they responding. Using a Systemic Family Systems Approach with interventions from Response-Based Practice and Narrative Therapy we will explore the interactions in which the "problems" occur. We will also explore the meaning behind the responses.

Imagine a family as a tree with branches, roots, trunk representing parts of the immediate and extended family. When working with families, all elements are considered. Usually there is a request for family therapy due to one of it's members in crisis, often a child. However, when an analysis of need is done it becomes apparent that more than one member of the family needs help in adjusting, growing and learning new behaviours. Clients contact me for a variety of reasons: to improve communications, solve family problems, support in special situations such as death, divorce, marriage, illness, child or adolescent issues.

Most family therapists inadvertently create more chaos through their well-intentioned efforts to assist a family move through a change process. Why? Brains are inherently deregulated (all of us, may I add) and most talking and dialoguing misses brain-centric problems that need more intensive help. Many times the emotional trauma created by years of solving problems ineffectively can wreak havoc on the brain's parasympathetic nervous system, not ever giving the family a break from flight or fight thinking. Contact us for an innovative neuroscience solution to family dysfunction. Kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161.

My approach is centered on fostering open communication, understanding, and cohesion among family members. Recognizing the unique dynamics within familial relationships, I tailor interventions to address the complexities of diverse family structures. By emphasizing effective communication strategies, conflict resolution, and the cultivation of a supportive family environment, my goal is to strengthen the bonds that connect each family member. Through a collaborative process, clients benefit from developing practical tools to navigate challenges, build resilience, and foster a harmonious family life.

Despite the best intentions of ourselves and our family members, we are often tangled in patterns of invalidation, rejection, frustration and blame. It can feel so messy that we operate in a constant state of fear and a crippling sense of unworthiness. In 2008 I started my counselling career as a family therapist. A combination of individual and joint sessions will take place to allow the space for all voices to be respectfully heard, while helping to identify bigger ‘systems’ patterns that keep you stuck in pain and finger-pointing. I will help to smooth out communication, make room for wants and needs and to heal the old wounds holding you back from having a healthier relationship.