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You have probably heard people say things like “be real” and “just be yourself”, and ‘stay true to yourself”. This is common advice given to children and adults alike. It should be simple, right? Just be who you are. But, there is much more to it than that, and it takes real courage and strength to be your genuine self. [More]

How many of us have had a particularly nasty, stressful argument and within a day have an intense flare up leaving you in agony? Probably too many of us. Communication will make or break each and every relationship we have throughout our lives. So why aren't we taking it more seriously? [More]

If you have been in an intimate relationship for any amount of time, you probably have several topics you have learned that you cannot talk about with your other half. Maybe you and your best friend support opposite political parties or you and your spouse disagree on how much time each of you should spend with friends or participating in hobbies alone, such as fishing, traveling, or crocheting. If you find yourself in similar situations, it is time to "agree to disagree." [More]

Many couples already understand that listening to each other is critical to building and maintaining a good relationship. On the other hand, too often they equate “listening” with simply remaining quiet while the other person speaks. In their own head they might be thinking, “Oh, I’ve heard all this before.” Maybe they’re busy thinking of the best response before their partner is even done talking. [More]

Why is it that we are so good at caring for others and so dysfunctional when it comes to caring for ourselves? Our culture has trained us to be givers, not takers. The problem is that being the proverbial 'good girl/boy' will literally rob us of our lives. We find that we never seem to have time for ourselves, our relationships become one-sided and we become more resentful towards others over time. [More]

One of the biggest problems is that constant or charged bickering can make others uncomfortable to the point that you’ll find your circle of friends shrinking rather than widening. Maybe you’re a more private person who doesn’t care about socializing in large groups anyway, but it’s nice to keep your options open, especially when it comes to friends you enjoy as a couple. Don’t get me wrong: I am not advocating putting on an act in front of your friends at parties to prove that you’re the happiest couple alive. That would probably backfire, anyway. [More]

Do you ever see a problem coming a mile away—a potential conflict between you and your partner—and spend hours (at least in the back of your mind) worrying about it? The good news is, it’s normal. Like kids worried about showing our parents a poor grade, we often blow things out of proportion. We assume that if we have bad news for our partner, he or she is going to have a terrible reaction. [More]

As an example, Tom described a string of dates the couple recently went on together where it seemed Brooke constantly found things to complain about. One night it was the service at the restaurant; another, it was a loud party at the table next to them. The last time they went to see a movie it was “the most predictable story line she’d ever seen.” On still another outing, she complained mightily about the traffic on the way to their destination. [More]

According to the American Psychological Association, between 40 to 50 percent of married couples in the United States divorce. That’s not news to anyone these days—the divorce rate in Western cultures has been notoriously high for decades. What does that mean to you? For one thing, during the course of your relationship and lives, you’re going to witness your fair share of friends, family members, colleagues, neighbors and others going through divorce. [More]

Being selfish has always been considered a trait to avoid. We're taught to give to others, to be selfless and caring. Many times however, we take our selfless acts to such an extreme that we are giving to others at the expense of our own welfare. This happens most often with our children and partners. [More]