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The holidays can be an incredibly stressful time of year, and because of that, it's important for us to get a grip on what is going on and figure out how we can take care of it in an effective and safe manner. Holidays are supposed to be enjoyed, but more often than not, they cause us to feel incredibly frazzled. Why are the holidays such a stressful time of year? What can we do in order to reduce the amount of stress we are feeling and enjoy the holidays in a healthy way once again? [More]

Many people have lost a parent, but very few people have had to deal with the pain of losing a child. It can be a really difficult thing to go through if you're a parent, and sometimes, the pain that fathers deal with during it is left behind. Both mothers and fathers have to work through the heartache, albeit differently, so it's important to take a look at that pain and see what we can do in order to help our way through it. Father's Day is coming up, and this day can be incredibly painful and heartbreaking for fathers who have lost a child in some way, shape or form. [More]

When you have your own family (as opposed to the one you are born into), you may want to develop some of your own rituals and traditions with your children and family. Rituals are acts that are carried out routinely with a specific intent. [More]

We’ve all been there – you have a special family gathering and someone creates a scene. While it happens occasionally in the best of families, in some families it is expected – and dreaded. [More]

Christmas is a holiday with many traditions, such as decorating a Christmas tree, giving presents to the ones we love, and dressing up as Santa Claus for the kids. But when and how did these traditions emerge? [More]

Whatever the reason(s) you are considering ways to avoid commercialism at Christmas, it can be done. It is easier to follow through with your efforts if you are very clear in your own mind about why this is important to you. [More]

Most people believe that the rate of depression makes a sharp rise during the holiday season. However, research shows that depression and suicide rates are actually higher at other times of the year. This does not mean that millions of people are not depressed during the holidays – they are. [More]

Idyllic scenes of family and friends gathering together to celebrate abound on social media sites at this time of year, and for those who don’t necessarily have a full schedule of events to attend there seems to be a major disparity that can aggravate depression. [More]

How do you cope in small spaces? "To be stuck inside a mobile with the Memphis blues again" as Bob Dylan so poignantly phrased it going from living in a house to living in a recreational vehicle has some unforeseen difficulties. Most assuredly everyone you meet will be bedazzled by your transformation and with more than a little better than the wish that they too could live happily ever after as the fairytale goes. Make no mistake about it if there was anything that annoyed you about your own personal habits or those of with whom you choose to travel being in a confined space acts like a catalyst on those feelings. You know you are there when suddenly you feel overcome by rage and annoyance. What is puzzling is the insignificant triggers that may cause this which normally you could deal with in your housebound existence. Anyone who has spent a significant amount of time in a confined space (sub mariners, felons and astronauts) will all agree that as Sartre said "Hell is other people." It is important to catch this unconscious hostility before it mushrooms and obliterates your good judgment. Too many people think that simplifying their lives will eliminate their hardship As the Dalai Lama so carefully pointed out simply making your life less complicated does not excuse you from the four noble truths of Buddhism which are suffering, illness, old age and death. Too many people think that simplifying their lives will eliminate their hardship and become disillusioned when they start to face those issues without any their usual escapes that living in a house provides. There is nothing any harder than learning to be civil in a small space. Even Shakespeare was prone to having "large thoughts in a small room." The essence of this attitude is to be open and aware of the other person. Aside from listening carefully without commenting or directing the conversation back to you; the major difficulty is sticking to understanding what that person is dealing with here and now, right in front of you. As in any relationship you have a choice of either listening and solving problems together or ignoring and arguing until somebody gets too tired. Social psychologists are quick to point out that a major cause for impulsive violence is overcrowding. The first thing you need to learn is the ability to quiet your own feelings and desires and really pay attention to the person you are sharing such a small space with. Along with this is an ability not to get engaged in criticizing or attempting to solve their difficulties. There is no greater love than knowing someone so well and still appreciating them... On the positive note this is an opportunity to both test your patience and get to know someone extremely well. It is one you can truly forgive their faults and enjoy the pleasure of being around them that you realize things may work out. There is no greater love than knowing someone so well and still appreciating them. About Dr. Kevin Kappler PhD:I have been a psychologist with over 30 years of experience doing therapy with individuals, couples, families children and adolescents. I have had many years experience consulting with people over the phone and through email since I have retired.Read more here

The origins of Thanksgiving have nothing to do with a bunch of Indians and pilgrims sitting down for a bountiful feast of turkey. In reality although the settlers with pale faces had been bothering the Indians in addition to giving them many new diseases they had never had were starving by this time. The Indians took pity on them and brought them some corn and fish. Thanksgiving has a lot of emotional disappointment and this article will show you how to deal with this. This is a period of time in which you are expected to give to others and be generous. Although the intention is good it often leads to self sacrifice and disappointment. This is a period of time in which you must balance your newfound humanitarianism with the demands on your own life. If you do not continue to reach your own immediate goals either at work or at home you will find yourself being irritable and exhausted. Remember that an obligation to give to others does not mean that you have to sacrifice your own needs. You must remember to give yourself some time for your own physical and mental well-being. It is a time when we most often neglect the things we do to make ourselves happy and keep ourselves balanced like exercise, yoga, or other spiritual practices for your own physical and mental well-being This is a time to find some positive solutions to deal with your family members past resentments. Remember that when I family system gets back together it quickly returns to whatever difficulties encountered before. Even if you're the only person in the room aware of this it may help you from dealing with the fallacy that "now that we're all together we must be alright." This leads to the need to decide on your priorities and organize your time adequately. I this will counteract your feelings that you have not a planned enough for Thanksgiving. If you find additional time you can always volunteer to feed the poor would do random acts of kindness. You may also need to have planned out some unstructured inexpensive holiday activity because this holiday evokes a feeling of being served good food rather than organizing fun things to participate in. Spending some time thinking about this will save the day when you are reunited with your family and no one knows what to do. One of the major fallacies are that Thanksgiving will take away feelings of loneliness, sadness, fear, anger and frustration. This holiday is heavily advertised is a time in which everyone appreciates being together. The fallacy behind that becomes clear when you are reuniting with family members and you realize why you have become independent of them. You may find yourself being overwhelmed with anger or fear or worse yet feeling alone being surrounded by your family. The worst emotion that creeps up on this holiday is resentment. It is usually triggered by a previous bad relationship with a family member. Beware of grudges and slights you have suffered in the past and keep them from resurfacing. Thanksgiving is designed to encourage gluttony. This is not an open invitation to eat too much. Remember that most people with eating disorders simply want to have something to control in their lives and to avoid the resentment and self-hatred you will naturally feel after eating way past feeling hungry. This includes other over indulgences. You know by now what you need to keep a careful eye on so that you don't lose control and this may be an opportunity to set an example with other family members who still have raging addictions. You may want to have some contingency plans when they become abusively angry, drunk or chemically impaired. If it the end of the holiday feast you find yourself still feeling depressed or resentful remember what the Indians did. They didn't like these foreigners who is strange customs and behaviors showed such a resentment towards nature that it disrupted and destroyed the Indian culture. Yet they still took pity on these poor starving people and threw them a fish or two.