Family Counseling Services in Encino, CA.

Let me guess. One partner feels alone and like they don't matter and the other feels they are always being criticized and can't get anything right. The more one asks for the other to show up, the more the partner disappears physically and emotionally. You both bicker and fight and the idea of sitting and just hanging out seems elusive, if not impossible. Something like this? Often we crave connection but are blocked by the pain and the history that gets in the way. Small fights about little things become battles that highlight our struggle to have our basic relational needs met. I can help you get under the bickering to the parts crying out for connection- to an enriching relationship.

In family therapy, I aim to reduce distress and conflict by improving the systems of interactions between family members. Sometimes all family members are present, but that is not always possible or necessary. By adjusting the viewpoint of problems as patterns of behaviors that need adjusting, and improving communication skills, families can strengthen and resolve conflict in a more peaceful way.

My clinical approach to Family Therapy begins with an evaluation to determine and understand the issues within the family context. It is the goal of therapy to provide a safe environment for family members to express their concerns about the family dynamic. It is at the beginning of therapy that treatment goals are determined. Emotional needs for each family member will be explored. Treatment consists of teaching conflict resolution and communication skills to help family members be able to address conflict more productively and with less distress. My clinical approach consists of instilling insight for families about the relational dynamic within the family.

My approach in family therapy is to focus on the problem or set of problems, not to assign blame to a person or the family as a whole. In family therapy, we will hear how problems affect everyone. There is not always a "solution," but more often than not there are untapped resources that a family can call upon to help reduce a problem's influence on each person's life.

Most family therapists inadvertently create more chaos through their well-intentioned efforts to assist a family move through a change process. Why? Brains are inherently dysregulated (all of us, may I add) and most talking and dialoguing misses brain-centric problems that need more intensive help. Many times the emotional trauma created by years of solving problems ineffectively can wreak havoc on the brain's parasympathetic nervous system, not ever giving the family a break from flight or fight thinking. Contact us for an innovative neuroscience solution to family dystunction. Kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161

Family life can be greatly rewarding and extremely challenging. Whether seeking therapy for issues arising from starting a family, preparing to launch children into adulthood or any stage in between, the difficulties cause concern and deserve attention. At all ages, the creation of a family structure with consistent boundaries and expectations can contribute to healthy lives, both as individuals and as a group. Common Areas of Focus: •Communication patterns •Rules and discipline •Regulating emotions and behavior •Effects of separation, divorce, blending families •Drugs, Alcohol, Sexual Activity •Freedom vs. Limits •School performance •Sibling/peer relations •Responsibilities and Goals

I use a family systems approach when working with families. I work with families in intimate relationships to nurture change and development. It is suggested that individuals cannot be understood in isolation from one another, but rather as a part of their family, as the family is an emotional unit. By working with families we can see patterns that are sometimes dysfunctional. Families who are able to see their dysfunction are able to make the changes that bring about healthy relationships within their unit.

When communication inside a family breaks down, people slip into fixed roles and stop saying what they truly feel, often to keep the peace. Over time that silence breeds distance and resentment. In our work, we slow things down so each member can actually be understood, while paying attention to the deeper currents underneath the friction — the unspoken expectations, old hurts, and recurring scripts that drive conflict on every side. As those come to light, family members begin to hear one another differently, and situations that felt stuck start to move. I hold space for everyone fairly, without judgment. I'm confident we can rebuild trust and care in your family.

A family is a unit composed of several individuals, that form its dynamic, communication style, interaction, needs and desires, and sometimes these ‘clash’ or do not go hand in hand or in great harmony, to say the least! When working with families it is important to know that each person and each family is unique and has its own style, challenges and differences in character and personality. Our primary aim will be to explore, with each of you, as well as together, the concerns and challenges and guide you to create a more harmonious and balanced family relationships.