Great Couples Counseling in Silver Spring, MD. Therapy to heal relationships.

Working with couples is my area of expertise and passion. I have seen relationships transform through the power of mutual understanding and increased sensitivity. Often couples become so entrenched in certain communication patterns that they can't even really see when and if their partner is trying to do something different. This is one way working with a good couples therapist can be so powerful - they can act as "translator" for partners, and dig through the years of pain and pattern to what's really in each other's minds and hearts. If both partners are willing, it's amazing what can happen; and even if only one person is willing, change is possible. I hold the hope until they can.

Couples therapy can be like inviting someone into your “home,” the special relational zone that you share with your significant other. Teletherapy can offer further enrichment to the therapeutic process, in addition to convenience factors. I strive to maintain a neutral and gentle perspective, helping you each observe and better manage your relational patterns of communion or disconnect. I can adapt my style to help you learn and practice new ways to empathize with your partner’s perspective, communicate effectively, resolve conflict and enjoy healthy connected-ness. I use tools such as the Myers-Briggs temperament styles, IMAGO techniques, and the Prepare-Enrich assessment survey.

Given the many challenges that can lead to divorce (money problems, adultery, differences in raising children, etc.) the wisest thing couples can do is to seek Christian counseling before they say "I do." No matter how solid a couple’s relationship may be, problems and differences will inescapably arise. Therefore, pre-marital counseling really operates as the best security system a couple could ever purchase. Our Christian counselors can be beneficial by familiarizing couples with targeted areas of conflict that often lead to divorce. These areas are: • Communication • In-Laws • Money/finances • Sexuality • Spiritual Intimacy • Roles (delegation of responsibilities)

There are two most basic fears of intimacy that we all have: one is fear of abandonment, the other is fear of being taken over, of losing my autonomy. In a relationship, people often become polarized with one clinging and the other seeming distant. With awareness of our fears and how to take care of ourselves and each other, we will bring out the best in each other. Everyone knows how to speak and listen, right? Not so. The most difficult skills to learn are to speak self-responsibly about your own experience and to truly listen and understand the other person's experience even when you don't like it. To learn these skills enables love. I can help.

Relationship counseling for couples is our primary specialty. How can you tell if couples therapy is right for you? Consider calling if you: * Find it hard to stop criticizing your partner * Feel defensive when asked for something by your partner * Find yourself avoiding your partner or family * Are developing emotional attachments to other potential partners about which you would not want your partner to find out * Are thinking about your partner or your marriage makes you depressed or anxious * Are not able to be sexually intimate with your partner We have relationship experts that will speak with you today.

My "Treasure Therapy" helps couples to become aware of themselves and their partner and to appreciate our inherent worth. I use different lenses to analyze how our social identity and sense of worth is shaped by society. This is important for helping couples have a sense of mutuality. John Gottman, an expert in couples therapy, talks about how power differentials can actually impede trust in his book, The Science of Trust. My own PhD research looked at 91 couples and found 12 common factors that influenced the balance of power in heterosexual romantic relationships, summed up with the word "TREASURES" because it summarizes how we approach people as precious treasures.

Sometimes a couple reaches a place where they need to work on resolving different conflict in their relationship. There may be communication issues and the ability to make thoughtful decisions about the relationship is lost. I use the Gottman approach to help you identify where the major issues are and interventions to help improve communication. I will be your neutral mediator, I do not take sides. My focus will be on the relationship and both of you will get time to give your story. The couple will have an opportunity to talk through the issues and at times figure out what the issues are.