Great Couples Counseling in Pompton Plains, NJ. Therapy to heal relationships.

Anger is not an aphrodisiac nor is it helpful in getting more of what you want. Couples in conflict often focus too much energy on changing their partner. The problem is that each partner does not have direct control over the other. The way out is of this dilemma is to learn how to not get so upset over what you dislike in your partner. I teach each partner how to improve their relationship by first modifying their own behavior. By having better control over your emotional and behavioral reactions you can more constructively communicate, negotiate and influence your partner. I teach you how to get your message across and positively influence your partner so that you can enjoy the results!

I usually see each person separately for a while to determine what the dynamics are and what each person brings to the relationship that is their own issues that need resolution.I will then see them together and achieve better results.My style of working with couples has been effective if both are ready to look at their issues and improve communication.

It's important that you know that I don't take sides or engage in blaming either partner. I understand that you are in my office because you want help. I get to know the couple as individuals and as a couple. So in addition to meeting together, I would meet individually with both partners. We would come up with a treatment plan, including frequency of meeting and schedule, treatment goals, and what each person wants from the therapy. We might focus on identifying feelings, changing toxic communication patterns, and opening up communication.

The quality of relationships is central to your well-being; however, relational stress is often difficult to manage. Your ability to develop meaningful and healthy connections can greatly improve when you learn strategies to improve your communication. With my therapeutic support, we will examine your interactions to determine what is causing or maintaining your interpersonal conflicts. I look forward to help you improve your relationship style and connections with others. My therapeutic strategies aim at gaining confidence, effectively communicate your needs in a warm and non-threading manner, and experience greater joy in your personal connections.

I work with many couples in my practice. I illustrate the negative cycles they get into, which is very important in calming volatile interactions, and understanding how each person triggers the other, which keeps their negative cycles in motion. We explore family histories and the messages, and coping skills they learned. I help couples to understand the emotions under their anger and frustration, and to begin to speak to their partner from this softer place. It is a process which can shift negative patterns, and create closeness. Whether there has been an affair, communication issues, a breach of trust, sexual intimacy issues, or something else, there can be a path back to each other.

Therapy for Couples include working on improving communication, making changes in dynamics both individually and as a couple, increasing self awareness, improving behaviors, learning to work as a team and having acceptance for individuality. Formulating goals and having a safe space to be honest will take place. Working on being open-minded will be explored. Learning healthy boundaries will be incorporated into the sessions.

What are the most common couples' issues? If you are thinking "communication, conflict, sex, money, child rearing" you are correct. However, most therapists will go after the symptom on each side of the couple fence thinking that the way to effective change is by getting each party to "work" on their respective "issue". Many times the parties dont agree but comply. Imagine if you could align the unconscious brains of a couple and stop the "working on your issues" part that has become so popular in therapy settings? Contact kevin@kevinflemingphd.com to learn how! Or call 877-606-6161 DR. FLEMING'S NEW RELATIONSHIP/COUPLES INTENSIVES www.kevinflemingphd.com/marriage-couples-retreats.php

www,YourMarriageCounselor.com Saving Your Relationship and Making It Work. Imagine how your relationship was in the beginning. I will help you build on those feelings, so that you can find the love that you have lost. I work with traditional and non traditional couples who are: dating, in long term relationships, living together, engaged, newly weds or couples who have been married for years. Some people say to me "Are you in favor of saving relationships?" My answer to them is: “Yes, as long as it is not physically and emotionally destructive to either of you.” Relationships are one of the most important things in our lives and it's not always easy go to: YourMarriageCounselor.com.