Great Couples Counseling in Amity, OR. Therapy to heal relationships.

There are countless models of healthy romantic relationships, from monogamous to polyamorous, and unique variations between partners. The scripts for dating and longterm relationships of our parents’ generations may not be applicable to your relationship, and there is no formal education in how to be a good partner or how to identify unhealthy relationships. But there is psychological research that shows that effective communication, emotional openness, intimacy, and other factors contribute to healthy relationships. Creating these conditions are skills that can be learned. I practice brief humanistic and emotion-focused therapy (EFT) to help my LGBTQ and hetero clients learn these skills.

Individuals who are experiencing difficulties in their relationship are often reacting to their spouse through the lens of a recent or distant breach of trust or attachment to a significant other. This way of looking at and treating relationship pain is termed Emotionally-Focused Couple's Therapy. Couples who are willing to come to the therapy room and identify the harmful patterns of interaction in their relationship and co-create with their spouses new, trusting, and loving patterns will often benefit from the work they put in in order to support a relationship that is very important to them.

If you're in a committed relationship with a partner, then chances are you've had some conflict at some point. (if you haven't, then I'm surprised you're reading this!) Most of us have had difficult experiences in the past that are difficult to fully leave behind us. Whether your relationship is new or decades old, counseling can help improve your communication and your sense of connection. Even if you aren't sure you'll stay together long term, we can discuss the patterns that show up in your relationships.

When you and your partner/spouse entered into your relationship, you both brought with you distinct, rich personal histories. These life experiences contribute to the way we interpret others' messages, how we react in certain situations, and the style of communication that feels most comfortable to us. I will observe your interactive style and patterns, and help you and your partner identify underlying causes, past experiences or interactive styles that have you stuck in a cycle of unresolved conflictual communication.

I work with couples where either one or both partners are Highly Sensitive People (HSP). Relationship issues can be compounded when high sensitivity is a factor and the couple misunderstands the cause. In working with me both individuals will complete a "sensitivity profile" to understand where each of their needs and gifts can support each other and where conflicts may be anticipated. Often the couple simply needs help in developing creative living strategies to honor the needs of each member, but in other cases more depth work around the communication process is necessary and we work to deepen intimacy by developing empathic listening, sharing, disclosing and clear request skills.

My work with couples is centered around creating a deeply intimate relationship that is made to last. I teach couples tools to help their relationship reach the next level. I am Gottman method couples therapy level one trained. This method is based on decades of researching couples to see what makes or breaks couple relationships. I believe in thoroughly assessing the relationship before treating the relationship.

Relationships are tough! Being part of a couple is an amazing experience but sometimes it brings hurt. Old wounds may become active. I work with couples at every stage of the relationship. Together will explore relational needs and desires, improve communication, and resolve conflict. Will work through infidelities and betrays. Bring the two you closer together and learn new things about your partner. I work with both traditional and non-traditional couples. Call, email, or text me today.

Working with couples is more than working with communication issues. Communication indeed plays a significant role; however, living with another individual is a challenge in itself. Communication isn't always done with words, in fact most of it is not. I have found that the primary reason for disharmony with couples is in unmet expectations. Changes in life changes expectations. We have to learn to grow with change and learn how to celebrate it, rather than reject it.

What are the most common couples' issues? If you are thinking "communication, conflict, sex, money, child rearing" you are correct. However, most therapists will go after the symptom on each side of the couple fence thinking that the way to effective change is by getting each party to "work" on their respective "issue". Many times the parties don’t agree but comply. Imagine if you could align the unconscious brains of a couple and stop the "working on your issues" part that has become so popular in therapy settings? Contact kevin@kevinflemingphd.com to learn how! Or call 877-606-6161. DR. FLEMING'S NEW RELATIONSHIP/COUPLES INTENSIVES. www.kevinflemingphd.com/marriage-couples-retreats.php