Great Couples Counseling in Costa Mesa, CA. Therapy to heal relationships.

Couples have come to see me for a variety of reasons throughout the years, but I find that no matter what the presenting problem may be, being able to effectively communicate with each other is vital to restoring the relationship. Often couples have a completely different style of relating to one another and resolving conflict. I work with couples to better understand their partner and I help each person to communicate in a way that they can finally be heard. It doesn’t matter what you are fighting about if the other person can’t hear what you are saying. Call 714-751-0888 so I can help you express yourself more effectively so you can stop the fighting and start the healing process.

I see clients in relationships of all kinds. Whether you are in a poly relationship, you practice non-monogamy, or if you are in a traditional marriage, you are in the right place. I offer a non-judgmental space where we work as a team to improve communication, develop connection and understanding, and use real tools to better your relationship. I am more than a mediator-- I help each person communicate their true thoughts and true needs without conflict. Do you have intimacy issues and need sex therapy? I provide that service as well. Sex is part of every relationship and should always be a priority. Physical intimacy is vital and I can help you make improvements that stick over time.

I provide couples counseling, marriage counseling, pre-marital and blended family couples counseling. I use Gottman principals and emotional focused therapy approaches in helping you build stronger connections, foster effective communication, and overall create lives built and aligned together. For those that would like Christian couples counseling we will integrate biblical principals alongside therapeutic interventions.

Why do we seem to have the same arguments over and over again? How do I know if we are really supposed to be together? Are there things we could be doing to better support each other, to help each other grow and be our best selves? If we really love each other, why do we so often hurt each other? How do I know if this is real love, anyway? Relationships are hard. Even more than desire, they require effort and understanding to make them work. Often, even if two people really love each other, one or both may need help to maintain the right effort or understanding to keep the balance necessary for long-term success. Having outside, objective support can make all the difference.

FREE 30 zoom call - text/call 510-335-5222. Couples therapy lights me up! Not feeling heard, understood, valued or supported? Toxic conflict? Withdrawing? Longing for help? Utilizing research-backed EFT & powerful tools from PACT, NVC, & IFS, I help couples create a secure bond & safe haven with each other. You'll learn to trust, support, hear & "be there" for each other. Discover your attachment styles & learn about the brain & nervous system, survival parts and trauma that may be damaging your relationship. Develop self-awareness, accountabiity & WE instead of just ME mentality. Turn towards each other instead of away with authenticity, compassion, attunement & understanding.

Couples struggling with repeated conflict, emotional injuries, and feelings of loneliness will find solace and rejuvenation in the therapy process. My approach to couples counseling is centered on healing attachment wounds and fostering a deeper connection between partners. By creating a compassionate and non-judgmental space, I guide couples in uncovering the underlying emotions that have led to the disconnection. Together, we will work to develop effective communication skills, rebuild trust, and cultivate empathy. You will experience relief from past hurts and discover new pathways to improved relational functioning, leading to a more satisfying and harmonious partnership.

What are the most common couples' issues? If you are thinking "communication, conflict, sex, money, child rearing" you are correct. However, most therapists will go after the symptom on each side of the couple fence thinking that the way to effective change is by getting each party to "work" on their respective "issue". Many times the parties don’t agree but comply. Imagine if you could align the unconscious brains of a couple and stop the "working on your issues" part that has become so popular in therapy settings? Contact kevin@kevinflemingphd.com to learn how! Or call 877-606-6161. DR. FLEMING'S NEW RELATIONSHIP/COUPLES INTENSIVES. www.kevinflemingphd.com/marriage-couples-retreats.php

I specialize in Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), a a highly effective method for healing relationships. Research has shown that 70-75% of couples who participate in EFT become closer and more intimate in their relationship, and 90% show significant improvements. As a trained EFT therapist, I am more interested in exploring the patterns and cycles that you get stuck in when facing conflict. How do you handle conflict? Do you become angry and lash out with your words, or do you shut down and tune out (or leave). How does your partner respond to you during these times? It is the dance between you that I am interested in exploring. Once we identify the dance, then we can work at change.