Anger Management and Counseling in Palmdale, CA.

Being angry is not bad in itself. It is when we use the energy that anger gives us to hurt others and ourselves that cause problems. Anger is a "red flag" that tells us that something is not right in our lives. If you are experiencing this type of anger, you owe it to yourself and the others you love to find out what you can do to control and even let go of destructive feelings and behaviors and have a much more productive, happier life.

I believe anger is a secondary emotion, covering other feelings such as grief, depression, anxiety, and/or hurt. Often times anger management is a signal for a need for trauma work, which can include explore prior experiences that felt stuck or emotionally taxing. Often times when others are angry, it's the only way they can feel heard-- having anger is not the problem, it's, what we do with the anger is what needs to be explored as appropriate or not.

A technique I use with Anger Management is Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT), which looks at our thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. Anger is a behavior that is an expression of our thoughts and feelings. I will work with you to help unlock the thoughts and feelings causing the anger. We can often correct negative thoughts that can help alter our feelings and behaviors. We can also look into other techniques to develop other coping mechanisms for anger. We resort to anger because that is what we were taught when we were younger. When you have other tools to express yourself and different thoughts, your anger isn't as necessary as often. You are still you. Just a calmer you.

I work closely with my clients and their families in identifying the triggers and body cues which preceed an anger episode. Focusing on being in touch with ones emotional experience prior to an outburst allows my clients to begin to identify and disrupt this behavioral pattern prior to a full meltdown. Behaviors are much easier to change before full escalation, and working with my clients and families on identifying these clues and implimenting effective coping strategies is a pivotal part of change.

Anger can be a powerful and overwhelming emotion that can cause harm to ourselves and those around us. My approach to anger management focuses on helping clients understand the root causes of their anger, identifying triggers and developing healthy coping mechanisms. We will work together to find ways to express anger in a healthy and productive manner, improve communication skills and build on personal strengths to increase overall well-being and satisfaction in life. Whether it's learning relaxation techniques or exploring past experiences that may have contributed to a pattern of anger, I will support you in taking control of your anger and finding peace in your life.

As a culture, we do not do well with healthy expressions of anger. Often we are raised to suppress it and then we have limited practice at dealing with big emotion. There is a spectrum of healthy aggression- to keep us safe and to maintain boundaries- and rage- our body's strategy for safety. Anger management is about applying the right "dosing" to maintain boundaries yet not fracture relationships or suffer other losses. I am able to help you learn to regulate your body to be able to apply the appropriate "dose" to be effective and not destructive.

Anger has a way of arriving faster than thought and leaving regret in its wake: harsh words you can't take back, a tension others have started to walk around. If that's familiar, there's nothing shameful about it, and it can change. In our work, we'll get serious about it out together: what sets it off, what it's defending, and what it might be expressing of deeper feelings. Much of what drives anger sits just out of view, and bringing it into words tends to take the heat out of it. As you come to understand your own reactions, you gain the freedom to choose how you respond. I've guided many people from explosive reactions to real composure, and I'm confident we can do the same. Let's begin!

I have witnessed first hand the radical transformation that comes with anger management counseling. So many men come into my office suffering from anger issues. Through working together collaboratively the anger dissipates, and what is underneath is usually much more nuanced then originally thought. Men and women suffer from anger differently. Anger Management counseling is a transformative process which creates space for ones' preferred identity to emerge.

Grey Matters International and the work of Kevin J. Fleming, Ph.D approaches issues of anger management in a very humane yet fresh perspective. You see, anger is a normal emotion but it is the valence (intensity) as well as the coupling choice of what one does with this that is the problem. Telling someone to "not" do it or modifying behavior with a trite psychological plan that only breeds a compliant response is not the way to change anger. Brainwave optimization is a new cutting edge technology that allows one to rewire circuitry responsible for reactivity driving the anger. Contact Grey Matters International, Inc now at kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161.

We all get angry sometimes. The issue is what you do with your anger. If you act it out in ways that hurt yourself or other people, that’s where the problems lie. You may express you anger physically by hitting people, hurting yourself, or breaking things. You may also express your anger by saying things that get you in trouble or damage your relationships. Sometimes it’s what you say, and sometimes it’s how you say it. Together, we can sort it out. We’ll see what triggers the anger and how you express it. We’ll work to undo the triggers and find other ways of dealing with the anger when it arises.

I help clients learn self-regulation tools to manage their regressions. We explore relational histories that have contributed to steady-state regressions and the challenge of managing secondary emotions. Ultimately, my clients are able to find healing from their previously reactive behaviors and more adaptive ways of handling their emotions. The result is better relationships.

To externalized emotions will reduce anger. Anger held in internally hurts. I will assist you in developing a means to solutions and resolution without you feeling the pain from anger. Working at coping and letting go of highly intense emotions will lead you to emotional freedom with the ultimate goal being emotional wisdom. It is not always what we say to another, but rather how we say it.

Everybody gets angry. Anger is a human emotion which can serve both positive and negative ends which, in itself, is neutral. Frustration, fear, feeling threatened or treated unfairly can trigger an angry outburst in any animal. Anger is a normal human emotion. It can be an appropriate response to injustice, unfairness or discrimination. However, what we need to achieve is a way of expressing anger that is reasonable, measured and proportionate. Cognitive behavioral therapy provides one of many possible answers to managing anger. Feelings are often created by our thoughts and examining our thought processes to see if they are reasonable and rational can help us with emotional regulation.