Great Couples Counseling in Buellton, CA. Therapy to heal relationships.

What are the most common couples' issues? If you are thinking "communication, conflict, sex, money, child rearing" you are correct. However, most therapists will go after the symptom on each side of the couple fence thinking that the way to effective change is by getting each party to "work" on their respective "issue". Many times the parties don’t agree but comply. Imagine if you could align the unconscious brains of a couple and stop the "working on your issues" part that has become so popular in therapy settings? Contact kevin@kevinflemingphd.com to learn how! Or call 877-606-6161. DR. FLEMING'S NEW RELATIONSHIP/COUPLES INTENSIVES. www.kevinflemingphd.com/marriage-couples-retreats.php

Discover how you can go from rejected to connected! Did you know the reactivity you experience is not your fault? (This is one of the main things that causes fights and arguments. It's when you feel out of control, & it leads to doing or saying things you regret, impulsivity, & leads to hurt & separation). I show couples how they can reduce the personal & relational reactivity they experience & increase feeling peaceful, calm, understood, validated, safe, accepted, & connected. I help couples discover their attachment strategies (how we feel safe & get our needs met). This is necessary in order to create lasting improvement, safety, trust, understanding, & connection, in your relationship.

Without conflict, couples do not achieve intimacy. The challenge is helping you and your partner learn how to have healthy conflict that leads to intimacy, rather than destructive conflict that destroys the relationship. I specialize in working with affairs and broken trust, abgtneuro-diverse couples. I usually start with helping you learn ground rules for being able to have safe, constructive, healthy conflict to reduce and eliminate destructive relational patterns. I also use Emotion Focused Therapy (EFT) to help you reconnect, learn healthy communication skills, rekindle the flame that you once had, and start talking to each other again. If you are willing to work, I am here for you

I help couples in ambivalence, individuals recovering from past relationship or attachment wounds, and spouses or family members of addicted loved ones. Transform your marriage with deep connection. I help couples understand each other, heal individual wounds, and fostering a closeness like never before. I am trained in Gottman Method Couples Counseling, Emotional Focused Therapy, and IFS for couples.

Let me guess. One partner feels alone and like they don't matter and the other feels they are always being criticized and can't get anything right. The more one asks for the other to show up, the more the partner disappears physically and emotionally. You both bicker and fight and the idea of sitting and just hanging out seems elusive, if not impossible. Something like this? Often we crave connection but are blocked by the pain and the history that gets in the way. Small fights about little things become battles that highlight our struggle to have our basic relational needs met. I can help you get under the bickering to the parts crying out for connection- to an enriching relationship.

I love working with couples. I believe that many of our issues and misunderstandings in relationships are based in a lack of feeling safe within the couple. Together we will explore the rules and roles of relating that you bring with you from your family of origin and how those 'dictates' influence your current behavior with your partner. We also take an in-depth look at your attachment history, looking how loved and supported you felt with your primary caregivers and again how these early bonds inform your present bond. I will support you in creating a safe and loving 'home' for your relationship, a safe space where you know your partner has your back.

FREE 30 zoom call - text/call 510-335-5222. Couples therapy lights me up! Not feeling heard, understood, valued or supported? Toxic conflict? Withdrawing? Longing for help? Utilizing research-backed EFT & powerful tools from PACT, NVC, & IFS, I help couples create a secure bond & safe haven with each other. You'll learn to trust, support, hear & "be there" for each other. Discover your attachment styles & learn about the brain & nervous system, survival parts and trauma that may be damaging your relationship. Develop self-awareness, accountabiity & WE instead of just ME mentality. Turn towards each other instead of away with authenticity, compassion, attunement & understanding.

FRUSTRATED ABOUT YOUR RELATIONSHIPS? Stressed out about what to do next? Are you considering breakup or divorce but really want to give it a last chance? Would you like to take one more look before making any permanent decision? I can help you gain clarity, confidence in your decision making in regards to a very important matter in your life through a brief and focused counseling process.

Working with couples is something I enjoy doing, helping them to work through conflicts and problems they may have with each other, restoring them to good feelings and a workable arrangement to get through their problems together. If you're concerned about an issue in your marriage or relationship and want support, I can help you.I help couples to learn to listen to each other and talk to each other from a place of caring respect. I have over 12 years experience working with couples, helping them to resolve their differences and get back to loving each other. Most couples I work with report increased feelings of love and appreciation for each other, with more hope for their relationship.

I work with couples to repair and rebuild their relationships. My practice focuses on providing couples with the tools they need to create a healthier and more connected relationship. I believe in an integrative approach that is rooted in evidence-based therapies such as Emotionally Focused Therapy, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, and Psychodynamic Therapy. My goal is to help couples find a deeper understanding of one another and create a more meaningful relationship. I strive to provide a safe, non-judgmental, and respectful environment that encourages honest communication and healing.