Family Counseling Services in Petaluma, CA.

I offer a more loving, soulful approach to Family Therapy. I will teach you how to replace stonewalling and fighting patterns with time outs, mindfulness practices, nurturing talks, and scheduled boding activites. You will learn mindfulness techniques such as how to not step into your family member's negative energy when they stoke your anger. And by the way, I have been having great results with family therapy on Zoom!

When I work with the family, the approach is often related to understanding the quality of parenting and the quality of attachment to the children. I will help each family member understand their role within the family responsibilities. We will discuss and identify those roles, and the expectations. We will develop ways for you to better cope and manage painful situations. We will work together to improve communication during difficult times. We will work at redirecting negative thinking in a positive direction.

Most family therapists inadvertently create more chaos through their well-intentioned efforts to assist a family move through a change process. Why? Brains are inherently deregulated (all of us, may I add) and most talking and dialoguing misses brain-centric problems that need more intensive help. Many times the emotional trauma created by years of solving problems ineffectively can wreak havoc on the brain's parasympathetic nervous system, not ever giving the family a break from flight or fight thinking. Contact us for an innovative neuroscience solution to family dysfunction. Kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161.

I use a family systems approach in my therapy, so having family members in the room, in my opinion, is the most efficient route towards healing and growth in individuals. I encourage clients to address relationships that are causing distress in their lives and work towards healthy differentiation of self. This can be done in individual therapy as well, but is more effective when all members of the relationship are present.

Most families who come in to see me consist of adult children and their parents. Usually if a family with young children want to see me with their kids, the issues are more about how to parent more effectively. In those cases, I work with the parents to improve the family situation. Let me know if you would like to talk further about your family situation.

When working with children and youth, the therapist cannot ignore the family system in which the child lives. I work with parents in multiple ways to help support youth in treatment, which may include separate parent sessions, co-parenting sessions, systemic family therapy, or Filial Therapy, a play therapy practice that coaches and guides parents in special play sessions with their child to decrease unwanted behaviors, improve relationships and communication, increase the child's emotional vocabulary, and increase the child's self-esteem.

When communication inside a family breaks down, people slip into fixed roles and stop saying what they truly feel, often to keep the peace. Over time that silence breeds distance and resentment. In our work, we slow things down so each member can actually be understood, while paying attention to the deeper currents underneath the friction — the unspoken expectations, old hurts, and recurring scripts that drive conflict on every side. As those come to light, family members begin to hear one another differently, and situations that felt stuck start to move. I hold space for everyone fairly, without judgment. I'm confident we can rebuild trust and care in your family.