Anger Management and Counseling in Demarest, NJ.

Grey Matters International and the work of Kevin J. Fleming, Ph.D approaches issues of anger management in a very humane yet fresh perspective. You see, anger is a normal emotion but it is the valence (intensity) as well as the coupling choice of what one does with this that is the problem. Telling someone to "not" do it or modifying behavior with a trite psychological plan that only breeds a compliant response is not the way to change anger. Brainwave optimization is a new cutting edge technology that allows one to rewire circuitry responsible for reactivity driving the anger. Contact Grey Matters International, Inc now at kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161.

Do you find you have difficulty managing outbursts of anger? Or are you more prone to bottling your anger and sitting on it for hours or weeks on end allowing it to fester? Both of these are common responses to anger, and neither are beneficial. Anger management therapy can benefit you by helping you to learn that you can control the way in which you respond to your anger. Through exploring the underlying reasons for your anger you will gain useful knowledge to help you recognize your triggers. Furthermore, through mindfulness and cognitive behavioral approaches you will learn to channel your anger in a more productive way.

Anger isn't the problem. It's what's underneath it that we need to look at. Most people who struggle with anger aren't out of control, they're overwhelmed, and often carrying a lot more than they realize. Using CBT, EMDR, and emotional regulation techniques, I help clients identify what's actually triggering their reactions, shift the thought patterns fueling them, and develop healthier ways to express what they're feeling. We'll also look at how anger is showing up in your relationships, because that's usually where it does the most damage. The goal isn't to stop feeling angry. It's to stop letting it run the show.

Anger is a universal emotion. Anger that results in aggressive behaviors, acting out, or is interfering with living a healthy lifestyle is problematic. I will help you learn techniques to manage your angry feelings by working with you in identifying and modifying the thoughts you have that lead to angry behavior. As a result, you will learn healthier ways of coping with the triggers of your anger, and experience healthier ways of being .

"Sticks and stones will break my bones, but your words will break my heart." Anger Management is a powerful source of self-knowledge that develops skills that are useful throughout life. Anger Management does not eliminate anger; it empowers us to recognize surges of anger quickly enough to make a behavioral ‘U turn’ rather than saying or doing something we will regret. Instead of automatically reacting we redirect our attention inward to identify what has aroused the feelings of anger and how to deal with them appropriately. Over time the people close to us come to recall our previous anger as a dim and distant memory.

Sometimes anger is a response to feeling misunderstood: you cannot believe that the other person does not see what is evident to you. At other times, anger is an expression of frustration because you cannot attain a goal or you are prevented (by others or by life situations) from reaching a desired landmark in your life. As a therapist, I will help you understand what is fueling your anger, and once you get a better sense of this, you will be able use emotional energy to deal with the underlying personal frustration instead of wasting it in staying angry.