Great Couples Counseling in Wayne, NJ. Therapy to heal relationships.

There are countless models of healthy romantic relationships, from monogamous to polyamorous, and unique variations between partners. The scripts for dating and longterm relationships of our parents’ generations may not be applicable to your relationship, and there is no formal education in how to be a good partner or how to identify unhealthy relationships. But there is psychological research that shows that effective communication, emotional openness, intimacy, and other factors contribute to healthy relationships. Creating these conditions are skills that can be learned. I practice brief humanistic and emotion-focused therapy (EFT) to help my LGBTQ and hetero clients learn these skills.

I love working with couples and especially high conflict couples. I draw on the Gottman Method, an evidence-based couples therapy that starts with a detailed relationship checkup and great communication tools that will transform how you talk and listen to each other. Couples come to me for everything from dating challenges, premarital counseling, and marital check-ups to serious conflict, infidelity, ambivalence about staying together, and even recovering from emotional or physical abuse. I am trained to help you strengthen your relationship.

Sometimes members of a couple get stuck in their old relational patterns, the ways they have always related to others. As years pass by, and romance or sexual experiences diminish or other life events happen, the old patterns become more evident leading to gaps in communication, dissatisfaction, and lack of excitement. As a therapist, I will help you to communicate more effectively with your partner, in ways that acknowledge your personal needs and the needs of the other. I will help you find balance between conflicting needs: the needs of the individual and the needs of a couple. I work with straight couples and GLBT couples.

Relationship can bring great joy as well and great challenges. Many problems stem from difficulty communicating with your partner. I can assist you in finding the way to express yourself, as well as the capacity to listen; to find the appropriate boundaries that enable you to feel free while staying connected. Working through conflicts in relationships often not only preserves the relationship, but also empowers each individual to be more confident and open in their own life.

It's important that you know that I don't take sides or engage in blaming either partner. I understand that you are in my office because you want help. I get to know the couple as individuals and as a couple. So in addition to meeting together, I would meet individually with both partners. We would come up with a treatment plan, including frequency of meeting and schedule, treatment goals, and what each person wants from the therapy. We might focus on identifying feelings, changing toxic communication patterns, and opening up communication.

Anger is not an aphrodisiac nor is it helpful in getting more of what you want. Couples in conflict often focus too much energy on changing their partner. The problem is that each partner does not have direct control over the other. The way out is of this dilemma is to learn how to not get so upset over what you dislike in your partner. I teach each partner how to improve their relationship by first modifying their own behavior. By having better control over your emotional and behavioral reactions you can more constructively communicate, negotiate and influence your partner. I teach you how to get your message across and positively influence your partner so that you can enjoy the results!

The first step is to do a free couple’s assessment. In this session we’ll get clear on what has been difficult for both of you and how have you have been feeling. We will look at what the most important things that you have not been getting from your relationship. Then we will determine what makes a relationship for you and what would potentially break up a relationship. In closing we will go over what does work about the relationship and I will teach you a method that will help a woman learn to speak to men and for men to know how to speak to a woman.

I help couples of all ages and types to resolve issues that interfere with their connection and contentment. For most, this includes intimacy problems, both emotional and sexual. We focus on communication, assumptions, misunderstandings, differences, needs, wants, trust as well as betrayals, including affairs, roles and expectations. I start by seeing you together so we all hear together why you are seeking help. Unlike individual therapy, which is entirely confidential, with couples, the work is for both of you so it is important that the three of us communicate without keeping secrets. I often also have some individual sessions to get to better know who you are apart from your partner.

Our intimate relationships can be our greatest source of happiness or the source of our deepIest pain. My desire is to help you explore how your beliefs and choices have disrupted your relationship and have undermined your personal happiness. Good relationships require mutual respect, flexibility, and commitment. If you have lost your way and find yourself stuck in repetitive and destructive patterns of interaction, I can help you identify and understand what is driving those patterns and determine strategies for overcoming them.

Relationships can be a most demanding part of life, especially when the best of intentions seem to deteriorate into bickering and useless arguments. I help couples understand and change the patterns and dynamics that keep them stuck. Areas addressed can be communication, conflict resolution, roles played, family interactions, and many other relevant stress-areas.

Couples counseling is the focus-area of my practice. Within that specialization, more specifically, I work with couples coping with infidelity and affair recovery. At the cornerstone of my approach to couples counseling is to help couples deepen their trust and establish a safe emotional climate between them. Counseling is conducted with compassion, warmth and respect. I have helped many couples restore and deepen their connections with one another and I would be honored to help you and your partner too.

I can help you navigate understanding and recovery through infidelity, deceit, and betrayal and guide you on your path toward healing. We will work together to identify the problem behaviors and frameworks and map a path toward freedom from pain. It is possible to not only overcome this adversity but also to land in a stronger and better place than before. I am here and eager to provide a safe place to help you see healing and reconciliation.