Anger Management and Counseling in Oyster Creek, TX.

Anger, like other emotions, is neither good nor bad. Anger alerts our body and mind to know, simply, a problem exists that needs to be solved. Without anger, we become “door mats” where people “walk all over us”. Finding the solution that anger seeks can be tricky. The anger goal is to solve the problem; with the “rule” of not hurting ourselves, someone else, and actually making the problem smaller, not bigger. The challenge is when our “stuff” gets in the way. We “lose our cool”; allowing aggressiveness versus assertiveness to run the show. My approach allows people to find their voice, keep their personal power, while preserving relationships and solving the anger problem.

As a culture, we do not do well with healthy expressions of anger. Often we are raised to suppress it and then we have limited practice at dealing with big emotion. There is a spectrum of healthy aggression- to keep us safe and to maintain boundaries- and rage- our body's strategy for safety. Anger management is about applying the right "dosing" to maintain boundaries yet not fracture relationships or suffer other losses. I am able to help you learn to regulate your body to be able to apply the appropriate "dose" to be effective and not destructive.

In my experience as an EMDR therapist, I pay close attention to the links between past and present. I’ve seen time and time again how unhealed emotional wounds resurface and come out sideways. While anger management can provide helpful strategies, they don’t get to the heart of the issue. Often, anger is what we see on the surface, but the real problem is what’s underneath the anger. Negative beliefs like “I’m helpless,” “I’m out of control,” and “I’m a failure,” start to bubble up, and anger comes to the rescue. It can get us in trouble, but at least it gets the blood pumping. With research-proven EMDR therapy, I help men heal anger at its source so it doesn’t have to be managed.

Very often we look at emotions as good or bad, right or wrong. Anger is a natural part of our emotional experience of life. We experience challenges and frustrations in our daily lives and sometimes it can be difficult to work through the experience with the intensity of anger we may be experiencing. Learning to understand what the anger is about and why it is as intense as it is can help us to move into a new relationship with our anger which allows us to experience it the way we want without guilt or shame.

Grey Matters International and the work of Kevin J. Fleming, Ph.D approaches issues of anger management in a very humane yet fresh perspective. You see, anger is a normal emotion but it is the valence (intensity) as well as the coupling choice of what one does with this that is the problem. Telling someone to "not" do it or modifying behavior with a trite psychological plan that only breeds a compliant response is not the way to change anger. Brainwave optimization is a new cutting edge technology that allows one to rewire circuitry responsible for reactivity driving the anger. Contact Grey Matters International, Inc now at kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161.

Whatever the issue, road rage, workplace frustration, interpersonal relationships, let me help you work through your anger. I utilize a combination of Mindfulness and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. The goal is to help you first recognize your anger as it manifests in your body, and then as you relax think through what your triggers are and how to keep your emotions from getting out of control. I look forward to hearing for you.