Anger Management and Counseling in Gilroy, CA.

Under the umbrella of anger, resides a host of other negative emotions, to tender to express. Discovering the root of the anger, resolves the anger. Management of anger should not be the final skill to handle anger. Resolving the anger so that little management is needed, is my strategy. EMDR therapy helps with this task of uncovering the source and processing what happened. A high level of anger carried in one's system, consistently stresses the body and the brain, lowering serotonin levels and causing numerous physical ailments. If your anger has worn you down, please phone me for a consultation about EMDR for anger remedy, a more permanent solution to cooling off the anger.

I help clients learn self-regulation tools to manage their regressions. We explore relational histories that have contributed to steady-state regressions and the challenge of managing secondary emotions. Ultimately, my clients are able to find healing from their previously reactive behaviors and more adaptive ways of handling their emotions. The result is better relationships.

Grey Matters International and the work of Kevin J. Fleming, Ph.D approaches issues of anger management in a very humane yet fresh perspective. You see, anger is a normal emotion but it is the valence (intensity) as well as the coupling choice of what one does with this that is the problem. Telling someone to "not" do it or modifying behavior with a trite psychological plan that only breeds a compliant response is not the way to change anger. Brainwave optimization is a new cutting edge technology that allows one to rewire circuitry responsible for reactivity driving the anger. Contact Grey Matters International, Inc now at kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161.

I do not believe in "anger management". Instead, I believe in being in control of your emotions - including anger. My clients discover how to be in control of their feelings of anger or rage - instead of the anger or rage controlling them. My clients discover how they can feel anger, but then choose more effective and productive ways of expressing themselves - in ways that no longer lead to regret or hurt - but rather in ways they feel proud and good about.

When you are struggling to manage anger, there can often be feelings of shame, guilt and sadness due to feeling like anger is out of control. I can support you in improving how you experience strong emotions such as anger and reduce the impact anger has on your life and relationships. I am experienced in several approaches to the work of Anger Management, including CBT, DBT and Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction (MBSR). I can support you in gaining and practicing skills to manage anger in a way that allows you to better understand and articulate what you are thinking and feeling, which will help you improve your relationships and lead to an overall better sense of self.

Anger is one of our fundamental emotions, part of the basic machinery of our mind and personality. In some ways it is a useful tool that helps to motivate and energize us in seeking fairness and justice in the world around us. But this powerful hold-over from our primal history can also be enormously destructive if we lose control of it. If your anger is slipping out of your control and you find yourself saying or doing things that damage your reputation or your relationships, hurt those around you, or otherwise consistently put you on the outside of society's expectations for behavior, you need help to find tools or strategies to change this and I would be happy to help.

Anger has a way of arriving faster than thought and leaving regret in its wake: harsh words you can't take back, a tension others have started to walk around. If that's familiar, there's nothing shameful about it, and it can change. In our work, we'll get serious about it out together: what sets it off, what it's defending, and what it might be expressing of deeper feelings. Much of what drives anger sits just out of view, and bringing it into words tends to take the heat out of it. As you come to understand your own reactions, you gain the freedom to choose how you respond. I've guided many people from explosive reactions to real composure, and I'm confident we can do the same. Let's begin!

To externalized emotions will reduce anger. Anger held in internally hurts. I will assist you in developing a means to solutions and resolution without you feeling the pain from anger. Working at coping and letting go of highly intense emotions will lead you to emotional freedom with the ultimate goal being emotional wisdom. It is not always what we say to another, but rather how we say it.