Great Couples Counseling in Compton, CA. Therapy to heal relationships.

Couples counseling is an amazing experience. Your relationship is my client and I will work closely with both of you to identify the relational dance you participate in, and how we can interrupt the negative patterns you engage in, and instead promote healthier ways of connecting and attaching. Couples therapy can be a really fun and pleasurable experience where you get to know more about your partner and also about your self. Couples therapy works in a stage process. I will be there along each step of the way helping to make sure that you guys are connecting. I will help to empower you both so that you may enhance and strengthen your most important relationship!

Couple relationships are the source of our greatest joy, fulfillment, frustration, fear, and hopes. When they go well, there is nothing better. When the go wrong they are the source of intense emotional pain. Did you know that there is significant, reliable research that informs what builds and what can unravel even the most loving relationships? We have this knowledge and can share it with you in a safe, caring, and confidential environment. It is possible to make your good relationship great and your hurting relationship whole again.

When working with couples, I focus on helping partners feel like they are on the same team again. Together, we’ll identify unhelpful patterns, address past hurts, and build healthier ways of communicating and connecting. Whether you’re struggling with infidelity, intimacy, parenting, or ongoing conflict, I provide a supportive space where both partners feel heard and valued. My goal is to help you rebuild trust, strengthen emotional closeness, and create a relationship that feels safe and fulfilling.

Discover how you can go from rejected to connected! Did you know the reactivity you experience is not your fault? (This is one of the main things that causes fights and arguments. It's when you feel out of control, & it leads to doing or saying things you regret, impulsivity, & leads to hurt & separation). I show couples how they can reduce the personal & relational reactivity they experience & increase feeling peaceful, calm, understood, validated, safe, accepted, & connected. I help couples discover their attachment strategies (how we feel safe & get our needs met). This is necessary in order to create lasting improvement, safety, trust, understanding, & connection, in your relationship.

There are countless models of healthy romantic relationships, from monogamous to polyamorous, and unique variations between partners. The scripts for dating and longterm relationships of our parents’ generations may not be applicable to your relationship, and there is no formal education in how to be a good partner or how to identify unhealthy relationships. But there is psychological research that shows that effective communication, emotional openness, intimacy, and other factors contribute to healthy relationships. Creating these conditions are skills that can be learned. I practice brief humanistic and emotion-focused therapy (EFT) to help my LGBTQ and hetero clients learn these skills.

Couples counseling can be helpful to any relationship looking to grow and improve skills to make your relationship thrive. If you are just starting out and it's premarital therapy you are looking for, or you are on the brink of the relationship ending, couples counseling can help. It will provide an outside perspective and increase your ability to interact in ways that are more productive and enjoyable. Even if your relationship is going great, there is always something to learn about your partner in couples counseling.

Do you envision a loving, respectful relationship with your partner? Would you like to strengthen your bond & gain a better understanding of your spouse? Are you interested in avoiding divorce & keeping your family together? I have some ways to help. In session I help couples improve communication, so that each person in the relationship feels heard, & solutions are fair & effective. I help you understand & respect your partner’s perspective & develop ways to compromise, to improve your relationship, without compromising your personal values. I also teach couples ways to discuss issues without arguments, establish fair rules and boundaries, & make your relationship rewarding and fun.

I have worked with hundred's of couples over the last 20 years. Each couple is unique in their own right which means there is no one way to "fix" a problem. Our deepest longings and hopes emerge in a couples relationship. Oftentimes we are working out unmet needs and hopes carried forward from our early family relationships to our present couple relationship. Problems become increasingly complex and difficult to overcome when we don't know what these issues are all about. Couples remain stuck in conflict not because of what they know, but what they don't know or can't recognize. The work in therapy is to help couples recognize unhealthy patterns of relating and introduce novelty.

Why do we seem to have the same arguments over and over again? How do I know if we are really supposed to be together? Are there things we could be doing to better support each other, to help each other grow and be our best selves? If we really love each other, why do we so often hurt each other? How do I know if this is real love, anyway? Relationships are hard. Even more than desire, they require effort and understanding to make them work. Often, even if two people really love each other, one or both may need help to maintain the right effort or understanding to keep the balance necessary for long-term success. Having outside, objective support can make all the difference.

How do you rate your partner? Do you just KNOW your relationship could be better? With Kevin Bergen, you'll find a specialist who can get you over your hurdles to relationship bliss. Are you tired of arguing? Is trust a problem now? Has one of you checked out of the relationship? Feeling alone or more like roommates? Kevin understands what you're feeling. He understands each of you equally, he'll affirm you when your partner is off track, and kick your butt when it's you who's out of line. If you want understanding and honesty, call Kevin for your couple's needs.

Couples have come to see me for a variety of reasons throughout the years, but I find that no matter what the presenting problem may be, being able to effectively communicate with each other is vital to restoring the relationship. Often couples have a completely different style of relating to one another and resolving conflict. I work with couples to better understand their partner and I help each person to communicate in a way that they can finally be heard. It doesn’t matter what you are fighting about if the other person can’t hear what you are saying. Call 714-751-0888 so I can help you express yourself more effectively so you can stop the fighting and start the healing process.

Let me guess. One partner feels alone and like they don't matter and the other feels they are always being criticized and can't get anything right. The more one asks for the other to show up, the more the partner disappears physically and emotionally. You both bicker and fight and the idea of sitting and just hanging out seems elusive, if not impossible. Something like this? Often we crave connection but are blocked by the pain and the history that gets in the way. Small fights about little things become battles that highlight our struggle to have our basic relational needs met. I can help you get under the bickering to the parts crying out for connection- to an enriching relationship.

Are you questioning whether to remain invested in your current relationship? Would you like to learn ways in which to strengthen your existing relationship? Learn effective ways of communicating with your partner that can help bridge the gap of misunderstandings, focus on strengths and identify tools that are already building on your commitment to one another.