Great Couples Counseling in Vineyard, CA. Therapy to heal relationships.

Couples therapy often triggers roadblocks in communication. In being shaped by prior relationships, we create various meaning from our experiences as well as receiving and giving instructions on how to live. When we form new relationships of any kind, this gets challenged; coming together and finding a path forward that celebrates all involved is the key to success. My specialty is interracial couples; regardless of if you both come from different backgrounds, the goal is to create shared meaning that is co-constructed. I can help with this process.

There are countless models of healthy romantic relationships, from monogamous to polyamorous, and unique variations between partners. The scripts for dating and longterm relationships of our parents’ generations may not be applicable to your relationship, and there is no formal education in how to be a good partner or how to identify unhealthy relationships. But there is psychological research that shows that effective communication, emotional openness, intimacy, and other factors contribute to healthy relationships. Creating these conditions are skills that can be learned. I practice brief humanistic and emotion-focused therapy (EFT) to help my LGBTQ and hetero clients learn these skills.

I am a Certified Gottman Therapist and use the world famous, clinically proven Gottman method in my work with you. The Gottman Method is backed by 40 years of research establishing what makes marriage succeed or fail. I bring a deep, abiding passion to helping you and your partner get back to the love that you have for each other. Using the Sound Marital House to asses your relationship strengths and weaknesses, according to the research, I customize our work together, focussing on the areas you need help and education with to restore trust, intimacy & friendship. Most people contact me for painful fighting that creates emotional and sexual distance. Learn tools to restore your relationship!

What are the most common couples' issues? If you are thinking "communication, conflict, sex, money, child rearing" you are correct. However, most therapists will go after the symptom on each side of the couple fence thinking that the way to effective change is by getting each party to "work" on their respective "issue". Many times the parties don’t agree but comply. Imagine if you could align the unconscious brains of a couple and stop the "working on your issues" part that has become so popular in therapy settings? Contact kevin@kevinflemingphd.com to learn how! Or call 877-606-6161. DR. FLEMING'S NEW RELATIONSHIP/COUPLES INTENSIVES. www.kevinflemingphd.com/marriage-couples-retreats.php

Why do we seem to have the same arguments over and over again? How do I know if we are really supposed to be together? Are there things we could be doing to better support each other, to help each other grow and be our best selves? If we really love each other, why do we so often hurt each other? How do I know if this is real love, anyway? Relationships are hard. Even more than desire, they require effort and understanding to make them work. Often, even if two people really love each other, one or both may need help to maintain the right effort or understanding to keep the balance necessary for long-term success. Having outside, objective support can make all the difference.

Discover how you can go from rejected to connected! Did you know the reactivity you experience is not your fault? (This is one of the main things that causes fights and arguments. It's when you feel out of control, & it leads to doing or saying things you regret, impulsivity, & leads to hurt & separation). I show couples how they can reduce the personal & relational reactivity they experience & increase feeling peaceful, calm, understood, validated, safe, accepted, & connected. I help couples discover their attachment strategies (how we feel safe & get our needs met). This is necessary in order to create lasting improvement, safety, trust, understanding, & connection, in your relationship.