Grief and Loss Counseling in Winters, CA.

The topic of Grief & Loss covers a broad spectrum from loss of a loved one, a relationship, a job...even change. It helps to work with a caring and empathetic counselor who has the life experience to really "get" where you are coming from, to help you move to the other side of things so you dispell those acute feelings of loss and sadness. In addition to my 10 years of private practice experience in this area, I spent several years as a volunteer with the Centre for Living with Dying in Santa Clara, working with people suffering from feelings associated with horrible loss. With gender identity issues, another specialty of mine, there is also often a sense of grief & loss to overcome.

The perception of grieving must be processed and understood before coping with loss can begin. There is individual timing in the grieving process, before the return to re-discovery. We are alive. What do we to do when we lose an attachment; positive or a negative one, who was part of our life? There are a number of emotions that emerge; confusion, sadness, guilt. Turn to your spiritual family and your friends. Take care of yourself. Continue to exercise; eat healthily; get plenty of sleep; work at letting go of feeling guilty. Verbally and emotionally express your loss. Say what you never got to say. Accept emotional support. Do not isolate

My approach to grief and loss is compassionate, supportive, and deeply individualized and personal. I provide a safe space to process the many emotions that accompany loss while assisting clients in adjusting to change as well as rediscovering a sense of identity. Together we will find meaningful ways to move forward without one feeling like they are leaving the person or the life behind that feels lost.

Grief and loss comes in all forms, from the death of a pet, to moving, to the loss of a dream, to the death of a child or spouse, and more. My clients discover grief and loss are a process (which includes: shock/disbelief, anger, blaming, depression/sadness, bargaining, and denial), and how to move through that process to an increased state of acceptance. As their state of acceptance increases, my clients experience an increase in forgiveness, healing, freedom and hope for the present and future. My clients see how they can begin to feel good about their life and future again.

When we lose someone we love, it feels like we have lost a part of ourselves. Something within us has been torn out, leaving a hole that we easily imagine will never heal. The pain can be profound, the feelings of helplessness, or regret, or guilt overwhelming. Having a partnership where you can talk through these feelings can make a huge difference not only in how quickly and how well you are able to move through the process of grieving, but also how you ultimately are able to frame the experience and your memories of the person lost into the narrative of your own self and life as you move forward. What you carry with you afterward is just as important as surviving the hurt of the loss.

Grief can be a difficulty beast to manage, a beast which can surface at any moment without warning and often comes in waves. When I’ve been grieving I’ve felt like I was in an emotional pong ball. With the aid of tools like EMDR CBT and guided visualizations I can help you to heal and leave the pain, loss, and grief in the past while holding on to the happy memories. Additionally, I can provide tools, coping skills, and other resources to help you manage this particular issue.

Grief and loss are universal human experiences, though few of us are given the tools or the support we need to express our grief, or, when the time is right, make our way back to life after loss. We are each unique in our response to the loss of people and things that are dear to us. Nevertheless, it does not serve us well either to try to ignore our experiences of painful loss or to keep them at the center of our experience for the rest of our days. I help people move through their grief at a pace that makes sense to them, and I help them, over time, to value the many gifts from who or what has been lost for their ongoing experience of life.