Great Couples Counseling in Idylwood, VA. Therapy to heal relationships.

Sometimes a couple reaches a place where they need to work on resolving different conflict in their relationship. There may be communication issues and the ability to make thoughtful decisions about the relationship is lost. I use the Gottman approach to help you identify where the major issues are and interventions to help improve communication. I will be your neutral mediator, I do not take sides. My focus will be on the relationship and both of you will get time to give your story. The couple will have an opportunity to talk through the issues and at times figure out what the issues are.

Couples counseling (whether with romantic partners, marital partners, friends or colleagues) is an effective means of improving your life, your partner's life, and the condition of those living with and around you. My approach is based on a blend of writers such as Drs. John & Julie Gottman, Ester Perel, Terry Real, etc..and theories such as Imago and Emotionally Focused Therapy. I do not think any one theory or method works for all clients. We will work together to determine what works best for you and your partner in order to facilitate growth and to enable you to have greater understanding, compassion, and improved communication in your own home.

Are you frustrated with your partner's career or life plan? As your career or life coach, I can help you get a plan to help decrease your stress. Together we navigate the path to realizing your ideal life vision. During the coaching process, we work to identify your core values, enhance your strengths, increase your self awareness and to ensure that we find you and your partner a career or life plan.

A large part of my work as a therapist is with couples: married, unmarried and pre-marriage. My approach focuses on communication, conflict resolution and understanding the internal dynamics of each individual and how these dynamics affect the couple relationship. I seek to help you understand your own personality and background as well as that of your partner. I am certified to administer an inventory, which can uncover the similarities and differences in your relationship dynamics.

I work with couples to help them create new and stronger avenues of communication--allowing them to find, once again, the joy each partner had in the other. Whether work has stressed your relationship, or children have created the gap, we can reimagine ways to find closer connections. Perhaps you feel as if you're roommates more than a couple. Or one of you has been tempted to stray--or has strayed--but you want to do the work to come back together. Therapy helps you find the new ways you need to communicate, leading to a stronger bond between you.

One of the most prevaling issues with one or both is to not feel "heard". Much emphasis has to be on the word "feelings". If one or the other has been abused in some way, they are very sensitive to "feelings". The word "being" is a key for stabilization of the relationship. I have done much research on the "Keys to Life" and one of the necessities is to trust. Listening and trusting are probably the glue that holds any relationship together and is foundational. A couple learning their primary function is not about themselves, but the common good of the family unit. After all, what will be your legacy? What will you be known for?

We specialize in helping couples, using Emotionally Focused Therapy. This is a complex approach which helps couples (of all sorts) to understand the deep need for safety and connection we all have, innately. When we feel repeatedly disappointed in the connection, or a serious breach such as an affair occurs, people react with protective anger, protesting the loss. Unfortunately, that angry protest often drives the more reticent partner farther away, leaving the first one even more desperate. We help people see that the unhappy cycle they are caught in is responsible for their suffering. And then we help them to find and share their more vulnerable feelings, creating a positive and affirming cycle....

In my work with couples, I view the relationship through the lens of attachment theory. The person we chose to be our partner, may become our "secure home base" as your relationship grows to be a healthy partnership to celebrate, depend on and lean on through the ups and downs of life. I view couples counseling as working with three entities: both partners and the relationship. The relationship you both share becomes my focus as we all collaborate together to bring forth the best relationship you can imagine. I look forward to working with you both. I use EMDR, Emotion Focused Therapy and Expressive Arts in my work with Couples.

I am a relationship therapist with years of training and experience helping couples to navigate the most painful and difficult chapters in their relationship. I will guide you with compassion, empathy, and a skill set that is born in working with couples across the country in their relationship challenges. I have been featured in Forbes, the Knot, and other leading media outlets discussing relationships, sex, and communication. I’d love to connect with you and your partner about the unique circumstances that you are facing and how I might be able to help.

Like all psychotherapy, couples therapy is a process, but one in which I work to help both members of a partnership to feel heard while also working for measurable change that couples can notice and know when they are making progress. I use attachment models to inform my work with couples–helping couples to develop a safer, more fulfilling and secure partnership. I focus on both present circumstances while also working to understand how problems develop and providing ways to prevent their reoccurrence. Some of the issues that couples often seek treatment for include the following: Communication Managing Difficult Life Transitions Separation/Divorce Loss/Grief Parenting Saving your Marriage Pre-Marital Counseling Managing Conflict

Couples counseling, which includes marriage counseling, tends to be at least 50% of my work as a therapist. I have had post-graduate training in couples counseling and working with couples after an affair. I am also certified to provide pre-marriage counseling using the Prepare Inventory. There is great benefit in seeing a counselor when your relationship is fracturing. In therapy, each person is given the opportunity to express his or her concerns, communication and conflict resolution skills are developed, and new patterns of relating are established.

My "Treasure Therapy" helps couples to become aware of themselves and their partner and to appreciate our inherent worth. I use different lenses to analyze how our social identity and sense of worth is shaped by society. This is important for helping couples have a sense of mutuality. John Gottman, an expert in couples therapy, talks about how power differentials can actually impede trust in his book, The Science of Trust. My own PhD research looked at 91 couples and found 12 common factors that influenced the balance of power in heterosexual romantic relationships, summed up with the word "TREASURES" because it summarizes how we approach people as precious treasures.