Great Couples Counseling in Loomis, CA. Therapy to heal relationships.

Why do we seem to have the same arguments over and over again? How do I know if we are really supposed to be together? Are there things we could be doing to better support each other, to help each other grow and be our best selves? If we really love each other, why do we so often hurt each other? How do I know if this is real love, anyway? Relationships are hard. Even more than desire, they require effort and understanding to make them work. Often, even if two people really love each other, one or both may need help to maintain the right effort or understanding to keep the balance necessary for long-term success. Having outside, objective support can make all the difference.

It can happen to any of us...everyday stressors we bring home to get taken out on the wrong person - - the one person who means more to us than anything. It leaves you both feeling awful. Maybe you are not getting enough attention, conversation, physical intimacy. The focus of relationship counseling is to change the negative path to a positive one: learn to listen to each other, support each others needs and goals, be willing to compromise, make family and relationship decisions together, stop keeping score, reconnect, relax, and enjoy each other If you reading this, you have already begun to move forward. Please call me so I can help you work through your issues and reconnect.

Couples therapy is my area of specialization and I love this part of my work. Many couples I see are in significant distress in their relationship and we work toward understanding what is causing and maintaining the distress. We will identify and explore the relationship patterns that lead to disconnection as the first step toward positive change and then work toward the development of greater intimacy, trust, safety and emotional connection. I have helped many couples who are on the brink of separation and divorce, as well as couples who are recovering from affairs, betrayals, and addiction.

Couples therapy often triggers roadblocks in communication. In being shaped by prior relationships, we create various meaning from our experiences as well as receiving and giving instructions on how to live. When we form new relationships of any kind, this gets challenged; coming together and finding a path forward that celebrates all involved is the key to success. My specialty is interracial couples; regardless of if you both come from different backgrounds, the goal is to create shared meaning that is co-constructed. I can help with this process.

Discover how you can go from rejected to connected! Did you know the reactivity you experience is not your fault? (This is one of the main things that causes fights and arguments. It's when you feel out of control, & it leads to doing or saying things you regret, impulsivity, & leads to hurt & separation). I show couples how they can reduce the personal & relational reactivity they experience & increase feeling peaceful, calm, understood, validated, safe, accepted, & connected. I help couples discover their attachment strategies (how we feel safe & get our needs met). This is necessary in order to create lasting improvement, safety, trust, understanding, & connection, in your relationship.

Every marriage has its ups and downs. In fact, it is not the absence of conflict that makes a difference, it is how you manage conflict when it does arise that determines whether a marriage will survive. Successful couples have learned HOW to manage their conflicts in a way that honors the needs of both partners.

FREE 30 zoom call - text/call 510-335-5222. Couples therapy lights me up! Not feeling heard, understood, valued or supported? Toxic conflict? Withdrawing? Longing for help? Utilizing research-backed EFT & powerful tools from PACT, NVC, & IFS, I help couples create a secure bond & safe haven with each other. You'll learn to trust, support, hear & "be there" for each other. Discover your attachment styles & learn about the brain & nervous system, survival parts and trauma that may be damaging your relationship. Develop self-awareness, accountabiity & WE instead of just ME mentality. Turn towards each other instead of away with authenticity, compassion, attunement & understanding.

Without conflict, couples do not achieve intimacy. The challenge is helping you and your partner learn how to have healthy conflict that leads to intimacy, rather than destructive conflict that destroys the relationship. I specialize in working with affairs and broken trust, abgtneuro-diverse couples. I usually start with helping you learn ground rules for being able to have safe, constructive, healthy conflict to reduce and eliminate destructive relational patterns. I also use Emotion Focused Therapy (EFT) to help you reconnect, learn healthy communication skills, rekindle the flame that you once had, and start talking to each other again. If you are willing to work, I am here for you