Great Couples Counseling in Santa Fe Springs, CA. Therapy to heal relationships.

Couples have come to see me for a variety of reasons throughout the years, but I find that no matter what the presenting problem may be, being able to effectively communicate with each other is vital to restoring the relationship. Often couples have a completely different style of relating to one another and resolving conflict. I work with couples to better understand their partner and I help each person to communicate in a way that they can finally be heard. It doesn’t matter what you are fighting about if the other person can’t hear what you are saying. Call 714-751-0888 so I can help you express yourself more effectively so you can stop the fighting and start the healing process.

Is this you? All we do is fight! It seems like we never hear each other and neither of us listens anymore! It is so frustrating I do not want to come home and try. I have been successfully helping couples to develop the tools necessary to communicate effectively for more than 20 years. Having disagreements is not unusual. Learning how to resolve disagreements is a key element to healthy relationships. Conflict resolution is about learning to fight fairly by listening in an atmosphere of Respect, Trust, Safety and love and not placing my desire to be right over the relationship.

Couples therapy often triggers roadblocks in communication. In being shaped by prior relationships, we create various meaning from our experiences as well as receiving and giving instructions on how to live. When we form new relationships of any kind, this gets challenged; coming together and finding a path forward that celebrates all involved is the key to success. My specialty is interracial couples; regardless of if you both come from different backgrounds, the goal is to create shared meaning that is co-constructed. I can help with this process.

Most couples come in seeking better communication. I will work with you to communicate effectively and in a manner that is respectful and compassionate in regards to your significant other's own story. Together we will look at your style of connecting or not connecting with one another and work to increase connection. I also work successfully with many couples who experience infidelity and are seeking to re-build their relationship. Pre-marital counseling is available for couples who are thinking of marrying or on their way to the altar.

Why do we seem to have the same arguments over and over again? How do I know if we are really supposed to be together? Are there things we could be doing to better support each other, to help each other grow and be our best selves? If we really love each other, why do we so often hurt each other? How do I know if this is real love, anyway? Relationships are hard. Even more than desire, they require effort and understanding to make them work. Often, even if two people really love each other, one or both may need help to maintain the right effort or understanding to keep the balance necessary for long-term success. Having outside, objective support can make all the difference.

What are the most common couples' issues? If you are thinking "communication, conflict, sex, money, child rearing" you are correct. However, most therapists will go after the symptom on each side of the couple fence thinking that the way to effective change is by getting each party to "work" on their respective "issue". Many times the parties dont agree but comply. Imagine if you could align the unconscious brains of a couple and stop the "working on your issues" part that has become so popular in therapy settings? Contact kevin@kevinflemingphd.com to learn how! Or call 877-606-6161 DR. FLEMING'S NEW RELATIONSHIP/COUPLES INTENSIVES www.kevinflemingphd.com/marriage-couples-retreats.php

Couples are often asked to participate first individually in a pre-counseling consultation. The following goals are then planned around improving strategies as a couple. My initial approach is directed at improving communication skill; listening and how verbal information and body language are being delivered to the other. The couple learns how to work together in a stimulating specific behavioral change. Sessions promote conversation about the couple's differences and similarities. Individually, you will find ways to unlearn old negative patterns to interpersonal related conflicts. Negative behaviors from the past and the memories, can often weaken the couple relationship in the present.

Do you envision a loving, respectful relationship with your partner? Would you like to strengthen your bond & gain a better understanding of your spouse? Are you interested in avoiding divorce & keeping your family together? I have some ways to help. In session I help couples improve communication, so that each person in the relationship feels heard, & solutions are fair & effective. I help you understand & respect your partner’s perspective & develop ways to compromise, to improve your relationship, without compromising your personal values. I also teach couples ways to discuss issues without arguments, establish fair rules and boundaries, & make your relationship rewarding and fun.

Many people can benefit from couples therapy sessions, even if their relationships do not have obvious problems. People often wait until very late in the game before seeking help, often times after one or both have already decided to end the relationship. Seeking the help of a psychologist can strengthen the behavioral and emotional bonds that keep couples together. Couples therapy changes the way that couples behave with each other. Sessions focus on improving interactions and building resilience. By focusing on the “Three C’s” of intimacy (closeness, communication, and commitment), partners learn how to achieve intimacy with their romantic partners rather than isolation

My goal is to help the couple learn how to love each other well. We work on learning how to express their needs and desires and also how to give to the other in the way that they need. I require homework assignments to develop intimacy and passion on a daily basis. We work on sexuality and physical closeness. Communication, anger management, roles and responsibiliteis are all addressed as needed. I am a nationally touring group counselor for New Life Ministries couple conventions. I have a hugs bag of tools and techniques as well as experience in leading couple retreats. Couples are my specialty.

All couples experience challenges. I specialize in helping couples through challenging times. Whether you are struggling with communication, sex and intimacy, or parenting, we work collaboratively to gain understanding and insight into the issue(s) so that the relationship can deepen and grow. I also help couples who are considering marriage and are not sure if they are a good fit. Even the best of relationships can feel difficult or discouraging at times. Together we can work through such difficulties so that your relationship can feel rejuvenated and fulfilling again.

As a dedicated student of both the Gottman Method and Emotionally Focused modalities of couples therapy, I bring both specialized knowledge and extensive experience to my work with couples. I help partners improve communication, navigate conflict, deepen emotional connection, and develop the tools needed to create stronger, more fulfilling relationships.

How do you rate your partner? Do you just KNOW your relationship could be better? With Kevin Bergen, you'll find a specialist who can get you over your hurdles to relationship bliss. Are you tired of arguing? Is trust a problem now? Has one of you checked out of the relationship? Feeling alone or more like roommates? Kevin understands what you're feeling. He understands each of you equally, he'll affirm you when your partner is off track, and kick your butt when it's you who's out of line. If you want understanding and honesty, call Kevin for your couple's needs.