Great Couples Counseling in Santee, CA. Therapy to heal relationships.

There are countless models of healthy romantic relationships, from monogamous to polyamorous, and unique variations between partners. The scripts for dating and longterm relationships of our parents’ generations may not be applicable to your relationship, and there is no formal education in how to be a good partner or how to identify unhealthy relationships. But there is psychological research that shows that effective communication, emotional openness, intimacy, and other factors contribute to healthy relationships. Creating these conditions are skills that can be learned. I practice brief humanistic and emotion-focused therapy (EFT) to help my LGBTQ and hetero clients learn these skills.

I am an Emotionally Focused Couples Therapist (EFT) which is the most empirically validated and proven couples therapy to date - helping couples go from distress to a more secure, lasting love, which after a 2 year follow-up, couples report a happier and more fulfilling relationship. I help couples understand their painful disconnection that creates distance and frustration, learn to be more clear in their communication and needs, helping couples begin to heal and repair rifts to bring about a deeper felt sense of security within their relationship. I desire couples to experience with one another that they matter, that they are cared for, they are unconditionally loved by their partner.

I've been a licensed Psychologist for 30 years, been married for 30 years, and know both professionally and personally what it really takes to make a relationship succeed. I've worked with hundreds of couples to help them have happier, more satisfying relationships, turning tug-of-wars into teams that pull together. I'm practical, straight-forward and results-oriented. It may not be easy to be happy as a couple, but it's definitely possible. Let's work on it together, so your tomorrow will be happier than today..

Most partners in relationships wish their mate would hurt them less and help them more. My role is to coach couples to do just that. Whether recovering from an affair, overcoming domestic violence or just learning to stop squabbling and get along there is a short but essential list of attitudes and skills necessary to build and maintain a healthy and enjoyable relationship. There is very little in life that prepares us for being in a marriage but we can learn what it takes with some work and guidance.

Why do we seem to have the same arguments over and over again? How do I know if we are really supposed to be together? Are there things we could be doing to better support each other, to help each other grow and be our best selves? If we really love each other, why do we so often hurt each other? How do I know if this is real love, anyway? Relationships are hard. Even more than desire, they require effort and understanding to make them work. Often, even if two people really love each other, one or both may need help to maintain the right effort or understanding to keep the balance necessary for long-term success. Having outside, objective support can make all the difference.

Couples therapy involves working with partners who are in a committed relationship. Individuals attend couples therapy to learn how to work through their differences, communicate better, problem-solve challenges in the relationship, work through parenting differences, improve their intimacy or their overall satisfaction with the relationship. Couples therapy involves assessing the strengths and weaknesses in the relationship, formulating goals and working diligently toward attaining those goals to establish and maintain healthy, loving and exciting romantic relationships.

If you are feeling like you’ve lost hope for your relationship, part of my job is to hold the hope for you. I passionately believe that there are very few problems that can’t be resolved when both partners are willing to work on the relationship. Even when you feel there is no way that you could regain what you once had, couples counseling can help you find something new and maybe even better. I practice Gottman Method Couples Therapy, and I welcome the opportunity to help you both build a stronger relationship. In addition to regular weekly sessions, I offer special 3-hour sessions to help “jump-start” the healing.

Effective couples therapy can be done with only one person of the couple in the therapy room. Many individuals in relationships have issues they are not ready to discuss in front of their partner for various reasons. They want to work with a therapist to truly understand their thoughts, feelings and dilemmas with regard to their relationship in a private, supportive setting. As a clinical psychologist with over 20 years experience, I have helped many couples in this treatment format. How it works is that couples are in a relationship dynamic. When one person shifts perspective and gains new tools, the relationship dynamic changes. I can help you. Call today.

What are the most common couples' issues? If you are thinking "communication, conflict, sex, money, child rearing" you are correct. However, most therapists will go after the symptom on each side of the couple fence thinking that the way to effective change is by getting each party to "work" on their respective "issue". Many times the parties don’t agree but comply. Imagine if you could align the unconscious brains of a couple and stop the "working on your issues" part that has become so popular in therapy settings? Contact kevin@kevinflemingphd.com to learn how! Or call 877-606-6161. DR. FLEMING'S NEW RELATIONSHIP/COUPLES INTENSIVES. www.kevinflemingphd.com/marriage-couples-retreats.php

Looking for a Christian therapist that can help you to work through relational struggles with your spouse or partner? I am trained in Emotionally focused therapy which helps couples to work thorough emotional distance and helps them to develop safety and connection in their relationship. I will help you to learn about the negative dance you get into as a couple and how to stop the cycle of distance or conflict.

Among human relationships, marriage can be a source of great joy and connection. Often over time, negative cycles and patterns of interaction can develop that create pain and disconnection in the relationship. Adult love relationships are about creating secure attachment and a connection that allows each partner to feel emotionally safe. Through the counseling process, I assist couples in identifying and overcoming negative cycles, healing from past hurts, and reconnecting emotionally. I also work with couples looking for healing from infidelity. Even very distressed couples can reconnect and restore trust and emotional security. I also provide pre-marital and enrichment counseling.

Our committed relationship or marriage is often the greatest trigger of stress and anxiety. This is because our very identities (our experience of ourselves) is threatened. This may be caused by a) unresolved issues from our family of origin, b) unresolved disagreements in lifestyle or child rearing, c) conflicts over sex, romance, and intimacy, or d) sometimes just the management of everyday stressors. The sad result is a "disconnect" between partners, and resulting loneliness. Working in collaboration, we will finding the cause, and build a strategy to reconnect you and your partner. Yes, you can recapture the love, attraction, and joy you deserve together. Let's get to work!

Are you feeling disconnected from your partner? Are you hurt and wondering what you can do to repair your relationship? I help couples to stop negative patterns of conflict that can pull them apart. I help them to repair hurts and to become a strong, connected team. I am trained in Emotionally Focused Therapy, a well-researched, very successful form of couples therapy. If you want to transform your relationship, I would love to help you!