Grief and Loss Counseling in Montclair, CA.

The death of someone we love is devastating and painful for all of us. All of your feelings are "normal" and it is ok to allow yourself the opportunity to experience them. But sometimes the sad, anxious thoughts and feelings do not dimish and you may need help in dealing with your grief. I provide a safe and compassionate place for you to share your thoughts, feelings and memories as well as helpful stratagies to help you cope and find meaning in this life altering loss.

Grey Matters International and the work of Kevin J. Fleming, Ph.D approaches issues of grief & loss through the lens of innovation----instead of growing the same neural networks responsible for the pain in weekly therapy sessions, we reset the brain to move forward quicker and efficiently by working on the stuck limbic system so as to empower the person with more success and traction. For no one wants to stay in a grief mode for too long; but when you don’t include the brain in your work with someone, you risk describing the water to them while they drown and calling it success. Contact Grey Matters International, Inc now at kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161.

Grieving can be such a complicated process, filled with mixed emotions. Even seeking closure can feel confusing and wrong at times. Therapy can provide a place to gently face painful feelings and thoughts. You do not need to stay stuck in the suffering, confusion, or pain. By processing through these layers with a trained professional, you can gain understanding, peace, and healing.

The loss of a loved one is never easy to cope with, neither is the loss of intimate relationships, separations or life changes that cause us to experience grief. Remember, your grief/loss process is unique to you. Give yourself the opportunity to share your feelings in a safe environment, where no one is pushing you to "move on" or "get over it."

I am a Certified Advanced Grief Specialist. Grief is a natural process following a meaningful loss and it can influence physical, emotional, behavioral & spiritual aspects of our lives. Grief is most associated with the death of a loved one, but also occurs with the loss of a pet, job, relationship, and changes in your health. People cope with grief in a variety of ways. The intensity and duration of grieving differs between individuals. Therapy is a safe place to express & explore your feelings. I will help you learn to cope and transform your pain into healthier ways of meaning and remembrance. Through therapy you will find permission to live your life and develop connection again.

You may feel confused, stressed, depressed, or crazy as you experience loss. Understanding the symptoms of grief is essential for gaining healing. A trained counselor can help you understand the normal reactions to grief and sort through the trauma related to your loss. A therapist can help you to understand your emotional states of denial, bargaining, anger, and depression associated with grief and make sure that your depression does not result in self injury or other unsafe thoughts or behaviors. If you want to feel normal again, then allow a counselor to help as you go through your grief. Not only will you feel better, but your family, friends, and coworkers will be glad you sought help.

Grief is hard. Grief is natural. Animals grieve. Grief is something we feel deep in our bodies and can be disorienting and destabilizing. Grief brings up questions about who we are, the world, the existence or goodness of God, and purpose and futility of life. Dealing with grief, especially when the loss is traumatic and unexpected, requires a slow and tender space to allow the grief to move through our body and to settle in our hearts with warmth and memory. I am here to help you grieve the loss of your loved one, experience, health , future or even your beloved pet. .

When someone is grieving, it is sometimes difficult to know what to say. People feel awkward and often are reduced to well-meaning platitudes. There is no magic wand to take away the feelings experienced in grief but having a place of safety and honesty can be an important step on the road to restoration. Being able to talk, weep, get angry and feel the feelings is often present in the early stages. The purpose of grief work is not about forgetting remembering with love in spite of the wounds it leaves behind.

I help clients navigate grief and loss by welcoming their deep feelings as a part of the process and navigating them carefully when they become overwhelming. Grief is a growth process like other difficult experiences, and I help clients find the resilience inside themselves to both honor their loss while getting stronger. By honoring the pain of the loss, we can move into a new phase of life that allows for thriving.

Grief counseling helps people cope with grief and mourning following the loss of a loved one or due to major life changes that trigger feelings of grief (i.e. job loss or divorce). It provides a space for individuals to work through and process the complex emotions surrounding loss. Healthy grieving results in remembering the loss with a newfound sense of peace, rather than searing pain.

Gentleness and patience are the key words for those in the process of grief and loss. When working with those who have lost a loved one, whether that be a close family member or a beloved animal companion, gentleness, empathy, and patience are of utmost importance. When working with clients who are experiencing loss. I provide special space for silence. The profound experience of loss is unique to each individual and requires space for the pain of the loss to emerge and careful regard for the mulit-dimensional experience of the empty space left behind. We will honor the healing process while simultaneously creating opportunity for transition to hope in a new season of emergent life.

Unfortunately, grief and loss are inevitable in life and sometimes we need guidance to process all that we’re feeling. My approach is to validate their loss and allow them to speak openly about it and then help them find healthy connections to their loved ones through memories. So much of the time when there is a loss, all people hear is “time heals all wounds.” That is rarely helpful in getting your life back on track because that implies you need to wait awhile before feeling better! Through our work, you will slowly learn to adjust to the new reality of your life without your loved one. This might require incorporating a new routine or even adopting a new sense of identity.

Loss can take different forms, and going through loss is one of life's biggest challenges. I understand this and believe it is essential for those going through a loss to talk about it, feel it, and grieve it. In time, healing will occur but time itself does not heal. I will provide a safe place for you to explore how your loss affects your life and help you to use the resources, time, and tools necessary to not only get through it -- but grow through it -- and survive.