Great Couples Counseling in Four Corners, MD. Therapy to heal relationships.

We specialize in helping couples, using Emotionally Focused Therapy. This is a complex approach which helps couples (of all sorts) to understand the deep need for safety and connection we all have, innately. When we feel repeatedly disappointed in the connection, or a serious breach such as an affair occurs, people react with protective anger, protesting the loss. Unfortunately, that angry protest often drives the more reticent partner farther away, leaving the first one even more desperate. We help people see that the unhappy cycle they are caught in is responsible for their suffering. And then we help them to find and share their more vulnerable feelings, creating a positive and affirming cycle....

We use the latest method of communication, conflict resolution, attachment theory and trust building to help couples resolve conflicts quickly and deepen they connection. We can help you transform your troubled relationship into a happy, successful, supportive relationship. Very few people are equipped with the understandings and technical skills that are necessary for an intimate relationship to be successful. Many couples lack skills in the area of communication, anger management, commitment, conflict revolution and / or intimacy skills. The things that make a relationship work are about the little things like how you solve arguments and how much you like and respect each other.

One of the most prevaling issues with one or both is to not feel "heard". Much emphasis has to be on the word "feelings". If one or the other has been abused in some way, they are very sensitive to "feelings". The word "being" is a key for stabilization of the relationship. I have done much research on the "Keys to Life" and one of the necessities is to trust. Listening and trusting are probably the glue that holds any relationship together and is foundational. A couple learning their primary function is not about themselves, but the common good of the family unit. After all, what will be your legacy? What will you be known for?

Often the relationships we cherish the most are also the places where we experience the most discomfort. We can feel all sorts of variations of misunderstood, unheard and uncared for (and often our partner feels similarly). The good news is that growth and healing are possible. Our brains are built for relational healing--we just need help getting unstuck sometimes. I would be honored to walk with you and your partner in helping you both to better understand yourselves, and each other, in the places where you are experiencing difficulty. And in so doing help you both to experience each other in richer, more meaningful ways.

Working with couples is a dynamic process that requires the therapist to maintain a safe space where both people can feel heard and understood. I am a certified Imago therapist and use a dialogical process to increase the emotional intimacy between the two people. I have worked with straight, bi, gay and lesbian and transgendered couples, and many different ethnic groups---and find that the challenges are essentially the same---to create a bond of trust that allows for all parts of the two people to show up and be accepted in the relationship. I share helpful handouts that people can use when they are home, to be able to deal with conflict more skillfully.

Working with couples is my area of expertise and passion. I have seen relationships transform through the power of mutual understanding and increased sensitivity. Often couples become so entrenched in certain communication patterns that they can't even really see when and if their partner is trying to do something different. This is one way working with a good couples therapist can be so powerful - they can act as "translator" for partners, and dig through the years of pain and pattern to what's really in each other's minds and hearts. If both partners are willing, it's amazing what can happen; and even if only one person is willing, change is possible. I hold the hope until they can.

Your relationship with your partner is the most important relationship in your life. Relationship issues touch every area of our lives. Learning healthy relationship skills is a fundamental building block of a successful life. Through therapy, you will learn how to achieve intimacy, manage conflict, how to give and receive love, and to create the relationship you have always wanted.

As marriage and family Therapist, I have specialized training to work with couples. I assist couples in more than communication. I help them build connection, which is the glue of a relationship. All relationships can get into a negative pattern, but without a secure bond the relationship can spin out of control. I assist couples in learning about each partners attachment style and help the couple build healthy problem solving skills through bonding. I offer premarital counseling with an online assessment. If you want to improve a longterm relationship, or heal wounds of infidelity, lets get to the heart of the matter. We all want to know we are important to our partner.

I provide marriage and couples counseling. I help couples to improve their communications to reduce arguing and to improve their understanding of each other. I also work with couples going through the pain of an affair. In most cases couples can work through their feelings and have an improved connection. Being a male therapist sometimes can help reluctant husbands/partners feel more comfortable coming to therapy and talking in therapy.

Every relationship has its challenges. Sometimes it takes an outside person to help you and your partner work through these challenges in an empathic and objective way. I use techniques that have been proven to work. Together, we will create a trusting and safe environment where you and your partner can talk openly about the issues that divide you. I don’t take sides or place blame. Instead, I work to understand each of you as individuals and as a couple. Our work will focus on building better communication skills, having more positive experiences as a couple, and coping more effectively with challenges. Together, you and your partner can build a stronger relationship.

There are two most basic fears of intimacy that we all have: one is fear of abandonment, the other is fear of being taken over, of losing my autonomy. In a relationship, people often become polarized with one clinging and the other seeming distant. With awareness of our fears and how to take care of ourselves and each other, we will bring out the best in each other. Everyone knows how to speak and listen, right? Not so. The most difficult skills to learn are to speak self-responsibly about your own experience and to truly listen and understand the other person's experience even when you don't like it. To learn these skills enables love. I can help.

Many couples have difficulties communicating. There may have been an affair or there may be a loss of intimacy. I can teach you powerful ways to respectfully resolve issues, communicate and connect in a safe, nurturing way to restore caring and love. You can learn effective ways to bring healing and forgiveness back into your relationship. Since each couple is unique, I use a variety of approaches, such as, the 'Couples Dialogue' developed by Dr. Harville Hendrix, Emotionally Focused Therapy of Dr. Susan Johnson, research of Dr. John Gottman, among others. I also help premarital couples to avoid pitfalls in their relationship and prepare for a successful long-term relationship.

Are you engaged and need premarital counseling? Or, perhaps you are married and simply "fell out of love". Is there an infidelity that needs to be forgiven, and the desire to repair the marriage? Is arguing the norm between the two of you? Through faith-based counseling a healthier "couple" will emerge and manifest. In a nonjudgmental and safe environment, exploration will take place to identify and eradicate the problematic circumstances. I look forward to working with you, and I applaud you for taking the first step toward a happier state of co-existence! Let's start your tomorrow today.