Grief and Loss Counseling in Bergenfield, NJ.

Grief and loss can be triggered by many things; the death of a loved one, the loss of a beloved mate, being let go at a valued job, and many others. When we cannot get over the loss by ourselves, a therapist point us down new roads. Suddenly vistas of possibility begin to open up, and what once seemed hopelessly sad begins to take on its proper importance.

Dealing with grief and loss is thought by most people to be life’s greatest challenge. Whether it be loss of a partner, child, friend, or other important person in one’s life, it is universally a sad and tremendously challenging part of the human experience. I have worked with people who have experienced losses of all types throughout the lifecycle, and helped them to understand the compendium of complex feelings and challenging situations that accompany grieving. Although in the midst of grief, there is often a sense of despair, I have helped hundreds of people resolve grief, and move on with their lives.

The pain you experience after losing a loved one is an intense human experience that could make you feel abandoned, hopeless, and incapable of moving forward in life. In addition, sometimes there is grief connected to losing something: a job, an opportunity, a past that will not come back, a country you left behind. I can offer an empathic ear and listening to you as you ponder important questions at this point in your life: What does your grief say? What are the fears that accompany your grief and loss? Is there a way to move forward in life knowing that the present and future will be different because someone or something won't be there with you?

Everyone grieves differently which means that coping with loss looks differently and varies from person to person. At Transformation Counseling Services our therapists are specially trained to help you move through the stages of grief and work through your loss. If you are experiencing grief related symptoms we are here to help. Please contact us for a free consultation.

Grief doesn't follow a schedule, and it doesn't always look like sadness. It can show up as anger, numbness, guilt, or even relief, and any of it is valid. Losing someone or something significant can shake your entire sense of self and purpose. I work with grieving clients using a combination of CBT, EMDR, and somatic approaches to help you process what you're carrying, at whatever pace feels right. We'll work through the hard emotions, find ways to honor what you've lost, and rebuild a sense of meaning. Healing from grief isn't about moving on. It's about learning to carry it differently.

Grey Matters International and the work of Kevin J. Fleming, Ph.D approaches issues of grief & loss through the lens of innovation----instead of growing the same neural networks responsible for the pain in weekly therapy sessions, we reset the brain to move forward quicker and efficiently by working on the stuck limbic system so as to empower the person with more success and traction. For no one wants to stay in a grief mode for too long; but when you don’t include the brain in your work with someone, you risk describing the water to them while they drown and calling it success. Contact Grey Matters International, Inc now at kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161.

Grief in and of itself is not a diagnosis. However, many people find themselves seeking out professional help following the loss of a loved one, the end of a relationship, or the loss of financial means. In grief and loss therapy you will benefit from a compassionate and warm environment where you can explore your grief with out judgement or fear. Grief is often isolating in our sessions not only will you be given the space to process and remember your loss, but also the tools and guidance necessary to eventually continue a fulfilling life.

Grief is about loss and the threat of loss. The stronger the bond between us and the person we have lost, the more we will hurt both physically and emotionally. When we are torn from a family member or friend, a part of us dies as well. Our natural need for attachment gets severed, often bringing the return of childhood fears. The world feels like a more dangerous place. As a result, we may feel out of control. We ache to have the loved person back. We know in the rational part of our minds that the person is not coming back, but it also seems impossible to let him go. We will remain emotionally conflicted until we can release our loved ones. Because letting go is so difficult, we must do it slow....

Grief and bereavement are the natural emotional responses to any kind of loss. It involves experiencing intense feelings, many of them unexpectedly and overwhelmingly. Loss is a personal journey; while grieving can often foster compassion and connection among family and friends, it is also common for the griever to experience difficulties identifying and sharing feelings or experience inter-personal conflict. Even, guilt, anxiety and anger may rise in addition to sadness and sorrow during grief. Bereavement counseling can provide a safe space to explore the struggles inherent to loss, with the support and understanding of a professional.

Grief and loss inevitably leads to anger & sadness. Not surprisingly, it also can lead to depression and feelings of guilt. The latter is called irrational guilt, as most of us lack magical powers to cure dying people. Even if they mean the world to us. I would encourage my clients to express feeling of guilt and anger often unconscious related to the loss. The anger is often at the person who died. Of course, this is irrational anger in most cases, as we all are going to die. The anger is over losing someone we love, value. I would use clinical interventions that usher in the grieving process. This fosters coming to terms with and an acceptance of the loss.

Personal loss such as a loved one or due to trauma needs to be mourned in order to move on in one's life. This difficult process requires a 'witness' to the emotional loss. Psychoanalysis serves the function of enabling a person to speak about the loss. It enables an individual to remember in a way that enhances the individual survivor.

If it is a past loss we will talk about that relationship and what it meant to you, and see how that person affected you in your current life and what he/she meant to you. If it is a current or impending loss, we can focus on day-to-day issues to lessen anxiety, and process how to handle what time is left. Practical issues may be discussed. if you find yourself obsessing we will probably focus on feeling, if you find yourself lost in feeling, we may focus on verbalizing your thoughts and your feelings. If you are overwhelmed by depression and find it difficult to function, I will make recommendations for medications and/or alternative strategies.

Grief and loss is, unfortunately, a normal part of living. There is no single "correct" way to grieve: different cultures and even individuals from the same culture grieve differently. The only consistent feature is that grief takes time. The most effective thing anyone can do for someone grieving is to be there—to listen, to empathize, to walk along with the grief. There is no "fixing" grief. But counseling can help prevent normal grief from developing into major depression or other mental health conditions.