Great Couples Counseling in Encinitas, CA. Therapy to heal relationships.

Humans experience the world through relationships with others. We are made to connect! When connections with our significant others are fractured, it can impact our mood, our health, our work and family relationships. We fear being abandoned, alone, and a disappointment to those important to us. Emotionally Focused Therapy can help us to reconnect, feel cared for, and to feel loved and valued again by our partners. You do not need to remain stuck in repetitive cycles of isolation and pain. Whatever your partnership arrangement, you are welcome. Things can change for the better! Maybe you are a couple on the brink of divorce. Discernment counseling can help get clarity on the path to take.

Many couples find themselves having the same argument over and over in different forms, never quite reaching what it's really about. That repetition doesn't mean your relationship is broken; it means something underneath the surface hasn't been heard yet. I help you slow the cycle down and see what each of you is reaching for beneath the friction: the longings and fears that are hard to put into words. So much of what strains a partnership lives in what goes unsaid, and as it comes into the open, real understanding and closeness become possible again. I don't take sides. I've watched many discouraged couples rediscover each other, and I'm confident you can too.

Couples are often asked to participate first individually in a pre-counseling consultation. The following goals are then planned around improving strategies as a couple. My initial approach is directed at improving communication skill; listening and how verbal information and body language are being delivered to the other. The couple learns how to work together in a stimulating specific behavioral change. Sessions promote conversation about the couple's differences and similarities. Individually, you will find ways to unlearn old negative patterns to interpersonal related conflicts. Negative behaviors from the past and the memories, can often weaken the couple relationship in the present.

What attracts us to an individual can become the seed for problems later in a relationship. Therapy can assist in identifying the emotional , thinking, and behavioral patterns that diminish the possibility of satisfaction and love in relationships. Therapy can help you to find new ways of relating that bring joy and happiness in sharing your life with another person. Skills can be learned and approaches to challenging situations modified that harmonize and balance conflicting points of contact with a loved one. Learning to relate in a way that increases your contentment in your relationships is only a few steps away. By opening your heart to the possibilities of love, you can heal injury.

My work with couples is developmental and focuses on self-confrontation, differentiation, and collaboration. Individuals in the partnerships that I work with take responsibility for their own mental health and happiness and learn to grow themselves up in a way that brings goodness and intimacy to their relationship. I can help them overcome gridlock and sexual challenges to strengthen the relationship and reignite desire.

What are the most common couples' issues? If you are thinking "communication, conflict, sex, money, child rearing" you are correct. However, most therapists will go after the symptom on each side of the couple fence thinking that the way to effective change is by getting each party to "work" on their respective "issue". Many times the parties don’t agree but comply. Imagine if you could align the unconscious brains of a couple and stop the "working on your issues" part that has become so popular in therapy settings? Contact kevin@kevinflemingphd.com to learn how! Or call 877-606-6161. DR. FLEMING'S NEW RELATIONSHIP/COUPLES INTENSIVES. www.kevinflemingphd.com/marriage-couples-retreats.php

Discover how you can go from rejected to connected! Did you know the reactivity you experience is not your fault? (This is one of the main things that causes fights and arguments. It's when you feel out of control, & it leads to doing or saying things you regret, impulsivity, & leads to hurt & separation). I show couples how they can reduce the personal & relational reactivity they experience & increase feeling peaceful, calm, understood, validated, safe, accepted, & connected. I help couples discover their attachment strategies (how we feel safe & get our needs met). This is necessary in order to create lasting improvement, safety, trust, understanding, & connection, in your relationship.