Grief and Loss Counseling in Northridge, CA.

Grief can be a difficulty beast to manage, a beast which can surface at any moment without warning and often comes in waves. When I’ve been grieving I’ve felt like I was in an emotional pong ball. With the aid of tools like EMDR CBT and guided visualizations I can help you to heal and leave the pain, loss, and grief in the past while holding on to the happy memories. Additionally, I can provide tools, coping skills, and other resources to help you manage this particular issue.

When we lose someone we love, it feels like we have lost a part of ourselves. Something within us has been torn out, leaving a hole that we easily imagine will never heal. The pain can be profound, the feelings of helplessness, or regret, or guilt overwhelming. Having a partnership where you can talk through these feelings can make a huge difference not only in how quickly and how well you are able to move through the process of grieving, but also how you ultimately are able to frame the experience and your memories of the person lost into the narrative of your own self and life as you move forward. What you carry with you afterward is just as important as surviving the hurt of the loss.

It is not a coincidence that losing a loved one feels like losing part of ourselves: I believe that is exactly what is happening. The people (or animals) that are closest to us help to make us the people we are. Whether through the end of a relationship, death, or moving away, the loss of someone dear to us presents a profound shift in our own life story, like a sudden storm on a calm sea. How do we navigate that? Do we sail on? Change direction? How do we even know where to begin?

Grief and loss is a very personal and individual experience. Finding one's words in relationship to a significant loss can be very helpful and healing. Traumatic loss, out of time loss and abandonment are specific losses that may need a sensitive and unique understanding. In a safe and empathic environment, psychotherapy for grief and loss can be a part of the healing process.

My approach to Grief & Loss is for the client to be aware of the 7 stages of grief and to have them understand that their feelings about their loss are normal. Many times when someone close to us dies, we question whether not crying, crying too much, or perhaps feeling angry at the world is OK. These are all normal feelings and reactions people have to loss. Once a client understands this, they can continue to grieve without having any questions about their own actions or feelings.

Experiencing grief and loss are some of the most complex emotions to heal from. Grief touches every aspect of our lives, work, family, and even times when we are supposed to feel good. Often, guilt comes along with the grief and the loss that we feel. Frequently, one feels as if they must shoulder their grief alone. You don't have to deal with this alone. I work with clients to process their grief and loss, whether it's a loved one or something else dear to you. Additionally, we'll figure out what other emotions you may have tangled up with your grief that are holding you back. I will guide and support you so that you will see a brighter day without the pain of regret.

Grief is a normal reaction to any type of loss. The therapeutic objective is to help bereaved individuals recover from the emotional pain caused by the loss. Therapy goals consist of: recovery from the loss to help the client feel better, choosing a healthier approach to grieving, finding new meaning for living, reducing fears and unhealthy ways for dealing with the loss, and having the ability to enjoy memories and connecting to the deceased rather than resorting to isolation/depression. My therapeutic approach consists of educating about the stages of loss, working on issues complicating the grief process, validating emotions and teaching better coping mechanisms to handle the loss.

Losing a loved one is extremely difficult and takes time to grieve. Loss can bring up intense feelings that cause problems in our lives, and sometimes paralyzes growth. There are also other types of losses that have a negative impact on us, and get in the way of personal progress. The goal of grief work is not to “get over it”, but rather to learn to live with the loss, finding a “new normal”.

Everyone grieves in their own way. You shouldn't feel you are out-of-control because you grieve in unexpected ways or for a longer peroid. Cultural and religious differences in grieving exist which are perfectly acceptible. A therapist must be sensitive to these issues. Grief is said to involve denial, anger, bargaining, deperession and acceptance. We will monitor your reactions to validate those feelings in session. Unhealthy reactions to loss do occur; self-medicating, and isolating oneslef for long periods, experiencing full-blown depression -- these behaviors, can prove detrimental. We will monitor your behaviors and mood changes and deal with negative conditions, should they occur.

Although loss is an inevitable part of life, it can be debilitating. I provide a safe environment where you can process your painful feelings so that you can find satisfaction and pleasure in your life again. Many people can feel paralyzed after the loss of a loved one. Often times this paralysis is a conscious or unconscious attempt to hold on to the one that was lost. Moving forward can feel unbearable, like you are losing your loved one all over again. I can help you move forward and still feel a deep connection to your loved one so that you can go on to live a life that feels fulfilling and worth living.

Grey Matters International and the work of Kevin J. Fleming, Ph.D approaches issues of grief & loss through the lens of innovation----instead of growing the same neural networks responsible for the pain in weekly therapy sessions, we reset the brain to move forward quicker and efficiently by working on the stuck limbic system so as to empower the person with more success and traction. For no one wants to stay in a grief mode for too long; but when you don’t include the brain in your work with someone, you risk describing the water to them while they drown and calling it success. Contact Grey Matters International, Inc now at kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161.

Confronting the pain of loss may feel too intense, but counseling can bring relief. How? Talking about your sadness, regrets, guilt, anger, etc., will help you release thoughts and feelings… slowly accept how the loss impacts your life… give the lost loved one a new place in your heart... and eventually adjust to your changed life and often-new self. You can re-discover the joy of life without forgetting what you have lost.

When we lose someone we love, the emotional and physical pain is difficult to explain. Studies show that grief and loss for many people are represented by real pain often in the area of the heart. This is where the term a "broken heart" originates. In many other countries when a person loses a loved one, they take several weeks away from work to process and handle the intense emotions from their loss. In the U.S. we are generally "allowed" 3 working days to "get over it!". Pain from the loss of a loved one takes time to heal. If you are mourning and need to talk with someone who understands and can help, please call to make an appt. Jeannette York, 818.200.9513 4405 Riverside Burbank,$150.