Anger Management and Counseling in North Arlington, NJ.

Hurt, frustration, annoyance, irritability, disappointment....all can be experienced as anger. Gaining clarity about the sources of my frustration can lead me to a calmer and more satisfying life. My relationships do not thrive when anger is constantly present, so resolving these uncomfortable emotions can lead to a happier life. A therapist helps you achieve this.

The benefit of my approach is that instead of getting angry you will learn how to think and react creatively so you are better able to find a way to prevail in the long run. People and life will sometimes do you in and obstruct you. However, you are rarely at your best when angry. It is your beliefs that lead to your self-defeating feelings of anger. I show how an angry response leads you to have far less leverage than if you felt healthy negative feelings like great annoyance, frustration, displeasure and disappointment. I teach you how to think about injustice, interference, and insult so that you stay in control of your reactions in order to creatively respond and ultimately prevail!

Managing our frustrations, irritations, upsets, and angry communication is a major challenge for men and women, children, and teens. Women’s anger is often sublimated as anxiety and incorrectly treated as such. I am interested in helping empower people to work through their anger and transform it into emotional strength. After working through anger issues, clients often report unexpected benefits, including more fulfilling relationships and financial success. Once the anger is overcome and clients develop skills to cope with everyday annoyances, they find themselves able to reach goals that had been thus far unattainable.

By helping individuals connect their irrational beliefs to their ineffectual and sometimes violent consequence, you will learn to take control of your anger and not allow it to control you. Using the ABC's of Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy we will explore how activating events in your life and your belief systems or your schema trigger your emotional and behavioral consequences. Additionally, using a pulse oximeter we will explore the effects of anger on your body and learn how to de-flood your system while learning self soothing techniques.

I work with anger management for anger that is not physically abusive and not required by the courts. We will look at the root causes - is this a way that you keep others at bay? Are there other ways to cope with anger? Is this an approach to conflict that you learned in your family? We will talk about your thoughts, experiences, and expectations regarding conflicts. I will help you to understand and articulate the cause your anger so that you are less likely to feel out of control.

I can help you learn how to manage your anger. Often anger is covering deeper feelings such as heartbreak, helplessness and loneliness. I can teach you a three-step anger process that can help you take personal responsibility for your angry feelings and learn what feelings you may be avoiding with your anger and, how you might be using anger to try to control others. Also how to know if you are really angry at yourself for maybe not setting a healthy boundary with someone and instead project your anger onto others.

This is an area that is vital to understand and know how to manage in order to have a healthy, compatible relationship. Not knowing how to reduce anger and handle it can sabotage a couple’s ability to communicate and get along on many levels. Anger unchecked, can destroy relationships and sometimes lead to violence. Over the years I have developed many techniques to help people reduce their anger, and have taught them how to communicate with their partner effectively. If you would like to learn about the 5 steps to manage anger you can go to: http://www.yourmarriagecounselor.com/anger-management-and-relationships/

One of the main tools I use with people to help them control anger, is mindfulness. Anger is a normal emotion; we all know what it feels like. No one can help how they feel, but they can certainly control what they do with these feelings. Mindfulness is a way to help people understand what is happening for them in the moment. Teaching people to stop and pause, as they become more aware of what is happening for them, is a way to help them make different choices, rather than jumping into the same patterns which have not been useful in their lives. There are other behavioral skills clients can use as well, but it all starts with slowing the process down and awareness of what is happening.

Sometimes anger is a response to feeling misunderstood: you cannot believe that the other person does not see what is evident to you. At other times, anger is an expression of frustration because you cannot attain a goal or you are prevented (by others or by life situations) from reaching a desired landmark in your life. As a therapist, I will help you understand what is fueling your anger, and once you get a better sense of this, you will be able use emotional energy to deal with the underlying personal frustration instead of wasting it in staying angry.

Anger is an important emotion, that often gets a bad reputation because it can cause us to behave in ways that are unsafe, out of control, and/or destructive. However, there is a difference between feeling angry, and acting inappropriately. Through anger management you will develop the ability to express your needs, wants and feelings in ways that are effective, and preserve your relationships with others.

Anger is a universal emotion. Anger that results in aggressive behaviors, acting out, or is interfering with living a healthy lifestyle is problematic. I will help you learn techniques to manage your angry feelings by working with you in identifying and modifying the thoughts you have that lead to angry behavior. As a result, you will learn healthier ways of coping with the triggers of your anger, and experience healthier ways of being .

Anger Management Therapy will include learning new ways of communication and self-expression. Using DBT and Internal Family Systems approach will allow for a balance in learning more about triggers to anger and that will result in more effective ways to manage these intense feelings. Results will be increased confidence in difficult conversations, being able to cope with any triggers that come up and using natural ways to self soothe and relieve any tension.

I believe children must first want to learn and perfect anger management. I have developed techniques to motivate the child or teen to develop a value system of respectful behavior toward others. Once this is achieved anger management skills can easily be obtained. Without a change in attitude and values, anger management training will fail because the child lacks the motivation to practice such techniques.