Anger Management and Counseling in Passaic, NJ.

What if you didn't have an anger problem? Are you holding back and constantly giving? You do this so much that you finally can't take it anymore and you explode. If that described you I can help. Too often people think that their anger is out of control when it isn't true. What is happening is you hold back on small irritations until it builds up. I can show you how to recognize this and stop before you explode.

I can help you learn how to manage your anger. Often anger is covering deeper feelings such as heartbreak, helplessness and loneliness. I can teach you a three-step anger process that can help you take personal responsibility for your angry feelings and learn what feelings you may be avoiding with your anger and, how you might be using anger to try to control others. Also how to know if you are really angry at yourself for maybe not setting a healthy boundary with someone and instead project your anger onto others.

My main approach is to help my client identify situations (contexts), people, behaviors (his and others) that seem to usher in varying degrees of anger. My main message is that anger is an appropriate feeling to loss and frustration, but it is his learning to appropriately express anger in an adaptive manner that leads to emotional growth and the mollification of the anger itself.

The benefit of my approach is that instead of getting angry you will learn how to think and react creatively so you are better able to find a way to prevail in the long run. People and life will sometimes do you in and obstruct you. However, you are rarely at your best when angry. It is your beliefs that lead to your self-defeating feelings of anger. I show how an angry response leads you to have far less leverage than if you felt healthy negative feelings like great annoyance, frustration, displeasure and disappointment. I teach you how to think about injustice, interference, and insult so that you stay in control of your reactions in order to creatively respond and ultimately prevail!

The goal of anger management is to control the anger before it controls you by reducing your emotional and physical responses to situations that trigger outbursts. At Emerge, you’ll learn to manage the intensity of your thoughts, behaviors and actions since that is all that you have control over. You can’t change the people or environments that cause you to feel enraged, but you can change yourself and identify when to remove yourself from the situations that are triggers. If you feel you’re becoming angry more easily and having low frustration tolerance, you can benefit from anger management. The first step is understanding that there is help available and reaching out for the support in order to make the change.

I believe children must first want to learn and perfect anger management. I have developed techniques to motivate the child or teen to develop a value system of respectful behavior toward others. Once this is achieved anger management skills can easily be obtained. Without a change in attitude and values, anger management training will fail because the child lacks the motivation to practice such techniques.

We feel anger because we feel that something is not fair, something is not working out the way we thought it should, our boundaries have been crossed, or we feel we have been treated badly, or missed out. Anger can be frustrating if you don't know how to address the underlying issue. I specialize in helping those whose anger is related to social anxiety, isolation, bullying, harassment or lack of important social skills.

This is an area that is vital to understand and know how to manage in order to have a healthy, compatible relationship. Not knowing how to reduce anger and handle it can sabotage a couple’s ability to communicate and get along on many levels. Anger unchecked, can destroy relationships and sometimes lead to violence. Over the years I have developed many techniques to help people reduce their anger, and have taught them how to communicate with their partner effectively. If you would like to learn about the 5 steps to manage anger you can go to: http://www.yourmarriagecounselor.com/anger-management-and-relationships/

Clients can explore and resolve past experiences which may be contributing to an amplification of negative feelings in trigger situations causing tension and distressing emotions and body sensations. Resolving underlying emotional issues related to present anger can help to be able to safely express anger that a client may not have been able to get in touch with before.

Anger is a natural reaction to a hurtful or threatening situation. When it becomes uncontrollable, constant, and extreme, unhealthy anger can wreak havoc on our lives. Some people can manage anger with self-taught techniques, reading materials, and other resources. Yet, anger management therapy is considered the most effective treatment option to address these anger issues and adopt healthy coping strategies to handle them when they arise.

Children and adolescents don’t usually say, “I’m having trouble with my anger right now and I need help coping”. They show us they’re experiencing overwhelming feelings with their actions and behaviors. Whether your child or teen is experiencing frequent tantrums or meltdowns or just difficulty regulating their emotions, I can help. I have extensive experience working with children and adolescents in both outpatient and school settings. Using play therapy, creative modalities, and cognitive behavioral therapy, I can help children and teens to communicate, make sense of their feelings, and begin to gain control over them so that they can overcome what’s standing in their way of happiness.

Do you find you have difficulty managing outbursts of anger? Or are you more prone to bottling your anger and sitting on it for hours or weeks on end allowing it to fester? Both of these are common responses to anger, and neither are beneficial. Anger management therapy can benefit you by helping you to learn that you can control the way in which you respond to your anger. Through exploring the underlying reasons for your anger you will gain useful knowledge to help you recognize your triggers. Furthermore, through mindfulness and cognitive behavioral approaches you will learn to channel your anger in a more productive way.

Grey Matters International and the work of Kevin J. Fleming, Ph.D approaches issues of anger management in a very humane yet fresh perspective. You see, anger is a normal emotion but it is the valence (intensity) as well as the coupling choice of what one does with this that is the problem. Telling someone to "not" do it or modifying behavior with a trite psychological plan that only breeds a compliant response is not the way to change anger. Brainwaive optimization is a new cutting edge technology that allows one to rewire circuitry responsible for reactivity driving the anger. Contact Grey Matters International, Inc now at kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161