Great Couples Counseling in Wood Ridge, NJ. Therapy to heal relationships.

There are countless models of healthy romantic relationships, from monogamous to polyamorous, and unique variations between partners. The scripts for dating and longterm relationships of our parents’ generations may not be applicable to your relationship, and there is no formal education in how to be a good partner or how to identify unhealthy relationships. But there is psychological research that shows that effective communication, emotional openness, intimacy, and other factors contribute to healthy relationships. Creating these conditions are skills that can be learned. I practice brief humanistic and emotion-focused therapy (EFT) to help my LGBTQ and hetero clients learn these skills.

You fell in love with your partner, enjoyed the heady first days of the relationship, but staying in love is difficult. Your relationship isn't what it was or you want, you "can't seem to get it right", or even start. The "happily ever after" fairy tale has soured. You can reauthor your story - you know life is not a fairy tale, but the real tale is far more interesting. Therapy is not about being broken, sick or wrong. It's about growth, courage & moving forward. You can learn practical skills to create an authentic loving relationship which includes passion & intimacy as well as caring & communication. It is exciting & joyful to rediscover your feelings for each other.

I help you learn genuine communication expressing your needs while respecting and caring for your partner. These fulfilling communications lead to a better relationship and a better life. Drawing close in intimacy in a couple can be challenging. Being close to another person can result in buttons getting pushed in areas of the self that were never resolved. Despite the challenge, we deeply want to feel intimacy in life. Intimacy in relationship, while often challenging, is one of the greatest opportunities for growth. Caring, compassionate communication between partners opens each person to deeper feeling, connection, and expression. These capacities are crucial for a fulfilled life.

In my approach to couples counseling, I integrate the Gottman Method, a research-based approach designed to improve communication, resolve conflicts, and deepen emotional connection. Using this method, I help couples identify destructive patterns and replace them with healthy, constructive interactions. By focusing on building trust, fostering intimacy, and enhancing problem-solving skills, I guide couples toward a stronger, more resilient partnership. Couples benefit from a deeper understanding of each other, improved conflict resolution, and a renewed sense of connection and commitment.

It can take us a lifetime to learn to accept the person we have chosen to live with, but it could also take us the same time to try to change that person and not be successful. Couples Therapy can help us understand that even though we all have the potential to change, we cannot change the other. We can learn how to accept the other person, live together or decide not to, and explore what are our own contributions to the dilemmas that we present.

Careers and children each place enormous stress on a couple’s ability to be together in an intimate and satisfying way. Every couple has different ways of dealing with the challenges, and counseling can provide the perspective and encouragement to re-create a shared vision for the future. For something as important as this, it is surprising how little training and preparation is provided; family therapy fills in the blanks, and resolves the confusion.

What are the most common couples' issues? If you are thinking "communication, conflict, sex, money, child rearing" you are correct. However, most therapists will go after the symptom on each side of the couple fence thinking that the way to effective change is by getting each party to "work" on their respective "issue". Many times the parties dont agree but comply. Imagine if you could align the unconscious brains of a couple and stop the "working on your issues" part that has become so popular in therapy settings? Contact kevin@kevinflemingphd.com to learn how! Or call 877-606-6161 DR. FLEMING'S NEW RELATIONSHIP/COUPLES INTENSIVES www.kevinflemingphd.com/marriage-couples-retreats.php

I use my vast experience to help couples in their early 20s to late 70s, of all genders and sexual orientations to understand each other and communicate effectively. Whether the conflicts are emotional, sexual, or financial, I am there for you to help you navigate the waters, leading to a satisfying relationship. Couples counseling and premarital counseling can empower you to bring more joy into your life and can help prevent the heartache and the tremendous cost of divorce.

I work with many couples in my practice. I illustrate the negative cycles they get into, which is very important in calming volatile interactions, and understanding how each person triggers the other, which keeps their negative cycles in motion. We explore family histories and the messages, and coping skills they learned. I help couples to understand the emotions under their anger and frustration, and to begin to speak to their partner from this softer place. It is a process which can shift negative patterns, and create closeness. Whether there has been an affair, communication issues, a breach of trust, sexual intimacy issues, or something else, there can be a path back to each other.

People can grow apart for many reasons. Sometimes life has become complicated, and you’ve lost sight of each other’s needs. Sometimes there is a breach and a loss of trust and you are not sure how to repair it, or if you even want to. One thing is certain: if two people are willing to work on repairing a marriage that has lost its way, for whatever reason, their relationship already has a foundation to build on. With time and proper counseling, the marriage can often be repaired. I work with committed couples, whether married or not, regardless of sexual orientation or gender identity, to help both parties clarify what attracted them in the first place, what is not working anymore, and why. Then we work on active listening and clear, simple communication....(view profile to read more)

It's important that you know that I don't take sides or engage in blaming either partner. I understand that you are in my office because you want help. I get to know the couple as individuals and as a couple. So in addition to meeting together, I would meet individually with both partners. We would come up with a treatment plan, including frequency of meeting and schedule, treatment goals, and what each person wants from the therapy. We might focus on identifying feelings, changing toxic communication patterns, and opening up communication.

Our intimate relationships can be our greatest source of happiness or the source of our deepIest pain. My desire is to help you explore how your beliefs and choices have disrupted your relationship and have undermined your personal happiness. Good relationships require mutual respect, flexibility, and commitment. If you have lost your way and find yourself stuck in repetitive and destructive patterns of interaction, I can help you identify and understand what is driving those patterns and determine strategies for overcoming them.

Relationships and marriage are hard work and require healthy and open communication. Life gets hectic & things are constantly changing. We believe there's always room for growth. From becoming new parents, to children starting school, dealing with peer relationships, social media, navigating the teen years, starting college, becoming a young adult, first relationships, dating & marriage. You'll learn how to be transparent and honest and work through difficult conversations and break down barriers to get your relationship back on track.