Grief and Loss Counseling in Cresskill, NJ.

Losing someone or something you love is profoundly painful. One of the greatest myths we hear is that “time heals all wounds.” In reality, time often deepens the ache unless we give ourselves permission to grieve. Healing requires space to mourn, honor what has been lost, and gently begin to carry it in a new way. It is my privilege to walk alongside clients as they move through grief toward healing, meaning, and peace.

Dealing with grief and loss is thought by most people to be life’s greatest challenge. Whether it be loss of a partner, child, friend, or other important person in one’s life, it is universally a sad and tremendously challenging part of the human experience. I have worked with people who have experienced losses of all types throughout the lifecycle, and helped them to understand the compendium of complex feelings and challenging situations that accompany grieving. Although in the midst of grief, there is often a sense of despair, I have helped hundreds of people resolve grief, and move on with their lives.

Personal loss such as a loved one or due to trauma needs to be mourned in order to move on in one's life. This difficult process requires a 'witness' to the emotional loss. Psychoanalysis serves the function of enabling a person to speak about the loss. It enables an individual to remember in a way that enhances the individual survivor.

I believe loss is a major issue in life and every loss brings up past losses. I work closely with individuals with all past losses to resolve current losses. This can result in relieve from extreme symptoms of loss.I have an extensive background in working with individuals with grief and loss issues from childhood also which is important in resoling current losses.

Grey Matters International and the work of Kevin J. Fleming, Ph.D approaches issues of grief & loss through the lens of innovation----instead of growing the same neural networks responsible for the pain in weekly therapy sessions, we reset the brain to move forward quicker and efficiently by working on the stuck limbic system so as to empower the person with more success and traction. For no one wants to stay in a grief mode for too long; but when you don’t include the brain in your work with someone, you risk describing the water to them while they drown and calling it success. Contact Grey Matters International, Inc now at kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161.

Grief and loss is, unfortunately, a normal part of living. There is no single "correct" way to grieve: different cultures and even individuals from the same culture grieve differently. The only consistent feature is that grief takes time. The most effective thing anyone can do for someone grieving is to be there—to listen, to empathize, to walk along with the grief. There is no "fixing" grief. But counseling can help prevent normal grief from developing into major depression or other mental health conditions.

When I very young I lost my fiancée. I went about life as if nothing had happened until it caught up to me. I was trying to open a door with a key and it wouldn't work. I found myself crying and felt out of control. This happened because I didn't want to grieve. What I learned is you can't skip this process. It will catch up to you at the strangest times. I can walk you through this without bottoming out. Ignoring it and avoiding it doesn't work

Grief is a natural response to a loss, and loss can come in many forms: loss of a relationship, friendship, health, job, financial stability, safety; death of a loved one or even a pet; or a loved one’s serious illness. It is normal to feel sad, numb, angry, even guilty, following a loss, but these feelings should become less intense over time. In therapy, together we can explore if the pain and feelings surrounding your loss are so constant and severe that they keep you from resuming your life, if you feel “stuck” in an intense state of morning and how to overcome and learn to live again.

All of us experience grief and loss in our lives. There is no escaping it. Unfortunately, there are many times that you will experience a loss that society does not sanction as "grief worthy." Loss of an early pregnancy, miscarriage, loss of a valued career or relationship, and the loss of a beloved pet often hit us hard, and result in feelings of grief. I listen with empathy and concern, and will assist you through the grieving process with sensitivity and support, while offering you effective ways of coping with your feelings.

Grief and loss are inevitable consequences of having deep, authentic, intimate relationships. When people we love, or things we value leave it hurts. That is healthy and normal. Unfortunately, this grief can sometimes feel infinite, especially when there were things left unsaid or unforgiven. In these times returning to a life that is purposeful and meaningful might begin to seem impossible. Grief and loss counseling will help you to find peace with the past. Through making sense of loss and letting go you will be able to move into the present with meaning and purpose.

We all experience loss at one point in our lives, but that doesn’t make it easier. Whether you’ve experienced the loss of a loved one, a relationship, a job, or something else meaningful to you, loss can leave us feeling alone, depressed, confused, and empty. I have extensive experience working with children and adults who have experienced loss and complicated grief. I provide a safe, gentle, and non judgemental environment and use a mix of trauma focused cognitive behavioral and insight oriented interventions. Through our work together you will begin to process your grief experience, learn coping skills to get you through the day, honor what you have lost, and to ultimately heal.

The way that a person has learned to protect themself self from a traumatic event develops into a part of their character in adult life. Our clinicians are trained to help you understand all of your parts and show you that the scary experience is over. We help you truly feel that you got through it and you can protect yourself if you need to! With this approach, we invite the wise parts of you to care deeply for the parts of you who are hurting. You have the power to regain control over your life, move forward, and heal.

If it is a past loss we will talk about that relationship and what it meant to you, and see how that person affected you in your current life and what he/she meant to you. If it is a current or impending loss, we can focus on day-to-day issues to lessen anxiety, and process how to handle what time is left. Practical issues may be discussed. if you find yourself obsessing we will probably focus on feeling, if you find yourself lost in feeling, we may focus on verbalizing your thoughts and your feelings. If you are overwhelmed by depression and find it difficult to function, I will make recommendations for medications and/or alternative strategies.