Anger Management and Counselling in Delta, BC.

What has anger accomplished for you? Anger can be a devastating emotion, that if not managed can cause problems in your life. By working with me, we can work together to help manage and better understand why you get angry. I can help you understand that anger is not the first emotion that we feel, but it is usually the first emotion people see. I can help you better understand and communicate your underlying feelings that lead to anger. It is important what you do with anger that counts. It is important to understand that you can use your anger in a constructive and positive manner to help you get what you want in your life. Call now to see how I can help you create a more fulfilling life.

Grey Matters International and the work of Kevin J. Fleming, Ph.D approaches issues of anger management in a very humane yet fresh perspective. You see, anger is a normal emotion but it is the valence (intensity) as well as the coupling choice of what one does with this that is the problem. Telling someone to "not" do it or modifying behavior with a trite psychological plan that only breeds a compliant response is not the way to change anger. Brainwave optimization is a new cutting edge technology that allows one to rewire circuitry responsible for reactivity driving the anger. Contact Grey Matters International, Inc now at kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161.

Anger is a powerful emotion that often gets a bad reputation. If you are struggling with anger, one of the most important things to do is to hear the messages anger has for you. I have worked with anger with many clients and truly believe that understanding the deeper layers underneath anger is imperative. I will work with you to process anger and help you uncover what is going on deeper.

Anger can be a reaction to a range of experiences, from past traumas to present-day stressors, and EMDR can help to desensitize and reprocess these experiences, reducing the intensity of the emotional response. Through the use of bilateral stimulation, such as eye movements or tapping, EMDR can help to process the distressing memories and emotions, leading to increased emotional regulation and a greater sense of control over one's emotional response. By addressing the underlying emotional triggers, EMDR can help to alleviate symptoms of anger and promote more adaptive coping strategies.

I believe anger management ultimately comes down to emotional regulation and finding an alternative way to still express yourself, but in a more safe and effective way. The goal is not to get rid of the emotion, but to work with it before it overcomes you. What is underneath the anger? What message are you trying to get across when you feel angry? How was anger expressed to you growing up? What emotions did you feel safe to express growing up? How did you learn to deal with your anger over the years? These are questions that I would explore and build skills from here to help you reach a better understanding of the processes behind the intense anger that you are feeling.

Anger often stems from feeling so many emotions all at once. You lose a sense of control. You go from 0 to 100 in a blink of an eye. By getting angry you’re attempting to regain control that’s presumed lost. But instead, you’re full of guilt and shame. Feeling angry and reacting in anger, is simply exhausting. I’ll help you learn how to regain control, in a healthy way.

I will go over with clients situations that result in them being angry, triggers of their anger and what their thoughts are when they are angry. We will go over how we think affects how we feel and how we feel affects how we behave. We will go over ways to help clients regulate their emotions better when they are angry. Strategies can include ways to manage impulse control, breathing exercises, and relaxation exercises overall.

A response to life's events falls upon a continuum from neutral to highly-reactive. At times anger, Gandhi called it "Righteous Indignation," is necessary to respond to injustices or inappropriate behaviours. However, uncontrolled, inappropriate anger is destructive to one's self and others. Mindfulness and Metta (Loving Kindness) meditations are excellent tools to deal with anger. Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) also called Tapping, along with skillful use of affirmations can help to cool the fires of anger. The benefits of anger management lead to a regulating of emotions and thus a gaining of peace of mind, positive relationships, career and family security.