Great Couples Counselling in Delta, BC. Therapy to heal relationships.

Intimate relationships are not easy. To have a fulfilling relationship, it takes the work of two people to build and sustain a loving, caring & harmonious relationship. I can help you to understand that there will always be arguments, but the arguments don't need to destroy your marriage. Together we can work on ways to resolve the reasons why you fight and to learn to talk to each other in ways that can help you understand each other. You and your partner have your unique views, beliefs and values. These will need to be discussed so you can both go forward creating the relationship you want. My approach is to work with you in a sensible & practical way to help you get a meaningful outcome.

Relationships are a crucial component of human health and happiness, and my passion involves helping people develop better connections with others as well as with themselves. By offering a setting that is based on trust, empathy, and collaboration, counselling can provide you with a safe and supportive space to explore your thoughts and emotions while creating a deeper, more authentic understanding of who you are, what you need, and the dynamics that you are navigating. Whether you attend alone or with a partner, I believe that there can be great value in processing relationships from the past or present as well as exploring the relationship that you're maintaining with yourself.

The Gottman Method helps couples break out of painful cycles by applying research from over 3,000 couples—studying both those who thrive and those who divorce—to identify what makes relationships work. In Gottman couples therapy, we'll identify patterns eroding your intimacy—like criticism, defensiveness, or stonewalling—and replace them with healthier ways of relating. You'll learn practical, evidence-based skills for expressing needs, listening deeply, navigating conflict constructively, and repairing hurt. Whether experiencing frequent arguments, feeling disconnected, or facing major challenges, you'll gain concrete tools to rebuild connection, taking your relationship on a new trajectory

My approach to couples counselling integrates Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) and Gottman Method principles to create a balanced, supportive, and practical path toward change. I help partners slow down, understand the emotions and attachment needs driving their conflict, and reshape negative cycles into moments of connection. At the same time, I offer clear, evidence-based tools for communication, repair, and strengthening of your relationship. Clients benefit from a space that feels structured yet compassionate—where they can safely explore their patterns, learn new skills, and build a more secure, intimate, and resilient bond.

Couples counselling focuses on developing strong communication skills, conflict resolution techniques, forgiveness, and effective dialogue. Many couples experience frustration at some point in their relationship where they feel they are not heard, valued or even loved any more. A toxic cycle of blaming, fighting and pulling away begins to form, creating distance and fatigue. For others an affair has shaken the very core of the safety and love they once felt in their relationship. It can be an agonizing and terrifying discovery for the partner who has been betrayed, and strong feelings of guilt, shame and a lack of understanding to how it even happened for the offending partner. Whether you are looking for a tune up to build back the excitement and...(view profile to read more)

In couples counselling, I would use a combination of an EFT approach as well as the Gottman Method which validated extensively couples, and has been shown to be two of the most successful approaches to help manage couples problems. Using these evidence-based techniques, we would explore the attachment style of each partner, determine the patterns of behaviour between the two individuals and the negative cycle that they are in. We would evaluate cultural factors if there are any, and of course focus on the core issues that the couple presents with. As a marriage counsellor, I would also use EFT and Gottman techniques to identify keys interactions and cycles in the relationship.

I work with couples using Gottman Therapy, Emotionally Focused Therapy and Attachment Therapy. I will help you identify your maladaptive patterns of behaviour and improve your communication skills. There is no shame in getting some coaching in how we connect with each other and how we can better meet each others needs. I use a strengths based approach to help you see the positives and remember why you fell in love.

It can be extremely difficult when we are experiencing issues in our closest relationships. Thankfully, a lot of these issues come down to communication skills that can be learned. When using active listening skills, you can begin to create a fuller understanding of your partner(s). We can also work on skills to express your own needs and desires in an effective way, using Non-Violent Communication tools. More often than not, we become frustrated when we don’t feel understood, but the reality is that we are not communicating properly, and our partners are not mind-readers, as much as we would like them to be (sometimes). Together we can create a more stable, loving foundation to grow from.

What are the most common couples' issues? If you are thinking "communication, conflict, sex, money, child rearing" you are correct. However, most therapists will go after the symptom on each side of the couple fence thinking that the way to effective change is by getting each party to "work" on their respective "issue". Many times the parties don’t agree but comply. Imagine if you could align the unconscious brains of a couple and stop the "working on your issues" part that has become so popular in therapy settings? Contact kevin@kevinflemingphd.com to learn how! Or call 877-606-6161. DR. FLEMING'S NEW RELATIONSHIP/COUPLES INTENSIVES. www.kevinflemingphd.com/marriage-couples-retreats.php