Great Couples Counselling in Vancouver, BC. Therapy to heal relationships.

Most couples, at some point, go through times when communication seems difficult and patterns of engagement are causing frustration and disconnect. Ruptures happen in ever relationship but closeness and attachment come about in the ways in which we seek to repair them. Counselling can help couples explore how their own individual past experiences have informed their current emotions and behaviours when conflict arises. It aims to help couples work together to heal, understand their partner and be each other's safe haven and comfort.

I welcome the opportunity to work with couples, whether married or not, LGBTQ, coupling or uncoupling. My goal is for partners to become more curious about themselves and about each other. We explore how unfinished business in one's family of origin and past trauma can affect emotional initmacy between partners. We will address ways of lessening emotional reactivity in order to work on relationship issues in a calm and respectful way.

I understand that navigating relationship issues can be incredibly challenging, affecting both your emotional health and the quality of your partnership. In our couples counselling sessions, we'll establish a safe environment for open dialogue, employing the Gottman Method to identify and address the root causes of your conflicts. This evidence-based approach focuses on improving communication, building empathy, and fostering mutual respect. While the journey to a healthier relationship may take time and commitment from both sides, there's genuine hope for renewal and happiness. Together, we can work towards a more harmonious and fulfilling relationship.

My role as a couple's therapist to create a safe haven, a calm bay, for you to make the repairs as needed, for you to re-embark on your journey together, stronger, more connected and back on the same team. The storminess of relationships is as natural as waves in the ocean, our ability to stay connect during the swells and crashing waves is what makes or breaks a marriage, not the wave itself. Our work together focuses on identifying our patterns and our partners patterns as we run for cover in the tumult of the wave. We then work on understanding, supporting and staying reconnected.

I help couples, friends, and various other dyads work on their connection and experience with one another. Our friends and romantic partners can make us feel certain ways (contrary to common messaging nowadays!) which impacts the relationship as a whole. I work in a systems approach to help you get clarity and reach the goals you would like in your relationship.

Couples counseling, rooted in the Gottman Method, focuses on enhancing communication, understanding, and connection between partners. Through assessments like the Sound Relationship House, we help couples identify patterns of interaction and areas of strength and growth. Interventions such as the "Four Horsemen" and "Repair Attempts" aid in addressing conflict constructively and fostering emotional attunement. By nurturing friendship, managing conflict, and building shared meaning, couples cultivate stronger bonds and develop skills for sustaining a healthy, fulfilling relationship.

Healing and growing in our sexuality & eroticism can help us understand ourselves and our partners in ways we may have never been privileged to before. It opens us to the appreciation of the full depth and breadth of human erotic expression. I work with individuals and couples. My approach is informed by training as an Erotic Blueprint Coach, somatic attachment and conscious kink. All forms of love, relationship structures, and sexual expression welcome.

Most couples get stuck at some point in their relationship. Intimacy is challenging for most us! I have a 2 pronged approach: I teach communication and conflict resolution skills as well as going deeper to discover the driving forces which lead to conflict. Conflict, once resolved, can lead to greater intimacy. The struggles you are facing now are the key to future deeper happiness and fulfillment and an opportunity for growth. I work with all types of couples.

Relationships usually start with lots of love and passion. After a while, however, the miscommunication between partners, their previous traumas, and the everyday stresses of life lead to an unhappy couple. With training in evidence-based approaches to helping couples, I help my clients become mindful of the repeating patterns in their relationship and their roots. We will then work together to change these patterns and create new loving healthy patterns. We will work on helping you communicate your true feelings to your partner without blaming, stonewalling, or criticizing. We will focus on helping you become more vulnerable with your partner so that your emotional bond becomes stronger.

Sue Johnson teaches in her emotion focussed therapy that there is a specific emotional process - a dance - that occurs between each couple. This cycle of relating (which can start with not getting one’s needs met and be followed by some protective response, for example), is largely informed by each partner’s early attachment wounds. When our relationship does not offer enough safety to be vulnerable, or when the more honest we are with our partner the more our connection is threatened, it’s time to reach out for support. In couples therapy we work to establish safety, vulnerability and connection, as well as learn the practical skills of effective communication and conflict resolution.

I am trained in the Gottman Couples Therapy Method developed by renowned therapists and researchers, Dr.'s Julie and John Gottman. This theory is based on over 25 years of research with couples and has been proven to be successful in helping couples overcome their relationship struggles. I use this approach in my work with both individuals and couples. I help clients determine their unique challenges and apply a variety of strategies to mend these challenges.

Our intimate relationships are where our deepest issues arise and our greatest healing can occur. In couples therapy we build on the principles of openness and honesty, creating a safe space where each partner can safely share their deepest needs and concerns. We work on individual awareness of personal issues that each person brings with them from their past while focussing on deepening the connection that they each yearn for.

Relationships can become tense, defensive, and hostile. Sometimes, ruptures in trust occur that leave us questioning "should I still be with you?" When our relationships feel insecure, we react often through becoming critical/nagging, or shutting down and checking out. I practice a form of evidence-based couples therapy called Emotion-Focused Therapy for Couples (EFT). Through EFT, we identify the negative cycle that has come to define your relationship, and work to repair this ruptured attachment bond, helping partners feel safer and freer around one another. This leads to improved intimacy, better communication, and a stronger emotional connection.

Are you and your partner stuck in unsolvable arguments? Does one of you tend to ‘demand’ more while the other shuts down and withdraws? Are you feeling less connected and actually adding stress to each other’s lives instead of reducing it? While frustrating, these are perfectly normal patterns of partnership and there is hope. I would be glad to help you untangle the knots, learning to team up together instead of entering battles over who is right. In doing so, we will unpack past traumas and patterns of behaviour, learning to better communicate and to be safely vulnerable in a way that stands your relationship on solid ground.

In Couples Counselling with me, I blend therapeutic approaches, including Gottman Couples Therapy, to create a safe, nonjudgmental space for partners to openly communicate and address relationship concerns. Through evidence-based techniques like Gottman assessments and proven strategies, couples can enhance understanding, develop healthier communication, and rebuild trust. The benefits include improved communication, emotional intimacy, and a renewed connection. Whether resolving conflicts, reigniting the spark, or enhancing the bond, I empower couples to build a fulfilling partnership.

Couples counselling offers a safe environment in order to begin the process of making decisions for the future of your relationship. Many people often find it easier to say the things that they need to in front of a counsellor. Sometimes it is impossible to step back from the problems in the relationship with a view of moving forward when you are embroiled in turmoil. Having an objective helper in the room can allow each party to release themselves for healing and growth. Whether you have a specific problem or are just feeling disconnected, counselling can help.

Couples counselling is highly rewarding work when both people are invested and willing to work. The work tends to lend itself not only to growth and healing in relationships but also in friendships, parenting and other relationships in peoples lives. On the flip side sometimes couples need support to know when it is time to identify behaviours in themselves or their partner which are incompatible with healthy relationships and to decide how best to proceed.

I have been trained in Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy, the Gottman Method and Family Systems. Typically I meet with the couple together for the first session to get an understanding of the presenting problem from both perspectives. From there I meet with each person individually to take a brief relationship and family history and to form a relationship of trust and safety with each partner. The goal is to identify the negative cycle of communication between partners, identify underlying feelings and fears that drive this cycle and finally to create a more secure bond between the couple. I am very experienced with working with couples where one or both partners have experienced trauma

Loving, successful relationships need to be carefully and skillfully nurtured in the following five areas: Emotional, Intellectual, Spiritual, Sexual, Financial. Couples who are ready to do ongoing work on their relationships are richly rewarded with a loving, meaningful and joyful life together. Committed relationships that have the possibility of morphing into long term relationships benefit greatly by being guided by the Gottman research on relationships as well as Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT). Premarital Counselling prepares a couple for a new stage in their relationship by identifying potential areas of conflict and strength and developing tools to create a strong foundation.

Do you look at your partner and wonder what happened to the sense of connection and intimacy that you once enjoyed? Have the stresses of life, career, and parenting gotten in the way of your relationship? Would you like to learn how to be heard and to hear what is really going on in your partner's heart of hearts? Couples counselling is an opportunity to re-connect and re-discover yourself and your partner. It is a safe forum to air difficult issues , develop skills for effective communication and enhance emotional and physical intimacy.

Relationship counselling focuses on the question "Why aren’t you having fun together?" Satisfying relationships require intimacy, honest communication, and interdependence. But sometimes they can seem like a Groundhog Day of bickering, criticizing, withdrawing, and frustration. I'm here to help clarify, demystify, and encourage you to speak frankly and listen deeply to each other. Is the message you’ve sent your partner the message that’s been received? Are you distinguishing freedom from license (interfering with the other's freedom, are demands disguised as boundaries? Through counselling, you can improve intimacy and communication, rebuild trust, and strengthen your emotional connection.

In my work with individuals, I have noticed folks come to therapy because of challenges in their relationships. I draw on the Gottman Method which focuses on helping folks build stronger emotional connections, improve communication, and manage conflict effectively. We work on strengthening the "friendship system" of the relationship, which includes trust, intimacy, and mutual respect, while also addressing deeper issues like shared goals and values. By using practical tools and exercises, the Gottman Method helps people foster a sense of understanding and partnership, creating a foundation for a more fulfilling and resilient relationship.

I work with couples using Gottman Therapy, Emotionally Focused Therapy and Attachment Therapy. I will help you identify your maladaptive patterns of behaviour and improve your communication skills. There is no shame in getting some coaching in how we connect with each other and how we can better meet each others needs. I use a strengths based approach to help you see the positives and remember why you fell in love.

What are the most common couples' issues? If you are thinking "communication, conflict, sex, money, child rearing" you are correct. However, most therapists will go after the symptom on each side of the couple fence thinking that the way to effective change is by getting each party to "work" on their respective "issue". Many times the parties don’t agree but comply. Imagine if you could align the unconscious brains of a couple and stop the "working on your issues" part that has become so popular in therapy settings? Contact kevin@kevinflemingphd.com to learn how! Or call 877-606-6161. DR. FLEMING'S NEW RELATIONSHIP/COUPLES INTENSIVES. www.kevinflemingphd.com/marriage-couples-retreats.php

In our busy, fast-paced lives sometimes we find ourselves drifting from our partner and our values of family, connection, or devotion that we hold dearly. I will work with you to re-focus your energy on your relationship so that you can experience more love and joy. First, we will focus on your story and help you heal from past hurts or identify your goals for your relationship. Then we will work on developing your skills so that you can experience greater partnership and connection with each other.