Great Couples Counselling in Abbotsford, BC. Therapy to heal relationships.

I have been in practise for a long time and much of my training and experience is in couples counselling. It is a privilege and opportunity to work with couples and more often than not we see successful outcomes. There is never a more satisfying feeling than seeing couples making important decisions for their future while keeping a priority of each person's own emotional well being!

The first step with my approach to couples therapy is for us to establish rapport as you inform me of the problem that has brought you to therapy. I use a Choice Theory approach which includes defining more closely what each of you want for yourselves as individuals and the relationship as a whole. From there, we get to work on rebuilding trust in the relationship by enhancing communication skills so each of you feel listened to, heard, and respected. Then we can build on trust to establish the changes needed to restore the happiness that brought you together in the first place.

In working with couples, I use an emotionally focused therapy approach (EFT). Sometimes the treatment process benefits from drawing on other sources such as Narrative therapy, Gottman, or Experiential therapy however my foundation works from EFT. I have experience in working with EFT in various couple dynamics.

Couples counselling can be sought at any stage of your relationship. By meeting you where you are in your journey together, I can offer several tools to enhance communication; cultivate understanding; increase capacity for connection and intimacy; adequately manage conflict and navigate boundaries. Through the use of several therapeutic interventions, I can work to uncover deep-rooted concerns that are affecting the quality of your relationship. And namely, offer appropriate, effective solutions. We can work collaboratively to resolve conflict, manage expectations and deal with various challenges including, but not limited to infidelity.

Loving, successful relationships need to be carefully and skillfully nurtured in the following five areas: Emotional, Intellectual, Spiritual, Sexual, Financial. Couples who are ready to do ongoing work on their relationships are richly rewarded with a loving, meaningful and joyful life together. Committed relationships that have the possibility of morphing into long term relationships benefit greatly by being guided by the Gottman research on relationships as well as Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT). Premarital Counselling prepares a couple for a new stage in their relationship by identifying potential areas of conflict and strength and developing tools to create a strong foundation.

I'm a down-to-earth, client-centered counsellor that can bring new hope to you and new life to your relationships. I specialize in marriage and couples counselling. I'm trained in Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy and Gottman Couples Therapy. With over ten years of experience, I have the tools to get your relationship back on track. I also offer intensive therapy for highly distressed couples. I'm here and ready to listen with warmth, kindness and compassion, without any judgement or criticism.

Are you and your partner stuck in unsolvable arguments? Does one of you tend to ‘demand’ more while the other shuts down and withdraws? Are you feeling less connected and actually adding stress to each other’s lives instead of reducing it? While frustrating, these are perfectly normal patterns of partnership and there is hope. I would be glad to help you untangle the knots, learning to team up together instead of entering battles over who is right. In doing so, we will unpack past traumas and patterns of behaviour, learning to better communicate and to be safely vulnerable in a way that stands your relationship on solid ground.

What are the most common couples' issues? If you are thinking "communication, conflict, sex, money, child rearing" you are correct. However, most therapists will go after the symptom on each side of the couple fence thinking that the way to effective change is by getting each party to "work" on their respective "issue". Many times the parties don’t agree but comply. Imagine if you could align the unconscious brains of a couple and stop the "working on your issues" part that has become so popular in therapy settings? Contact kevin@kevinflemingphd.com to learn how! Or call 877-606-6161. DR. FLEMING'S NEW RELATIONSHIP/COUPLES INTENSIVES. www.kevinflemingphd.com/marriage-couples-retreats.php

Couples counselling is highly rewarding work when both people are invested and willing to work. The work tends to lend itself not only to growth and healing in relationships but also in friendships, parenting and other relationships in peoples lives. On the flip side sometimes couples need support to know when it is time to identify behaviours in themselves or their partner which are incompatible with healthy relationships and to decide how best to proceed.

I emphasize creating a safe and supportive space where partners can openly explore their relationship dynamics, improve communication, and cultivate deeper intimacy. Whether couples are facing conflicts, navigating transitions, or seeking to strengthen their bond, I employ evidence-based techniques tailored to their specific needs and goals. By fostering empathy, facilitating constructive dialogue, and promoting mutual understanding, partners gain insight into their relationship patterns and develop practical skills to navigate challenges collaboratively. Couples benefit from learning effective communication strategies, conflict resolution techniques, and tools to rebuild trust and intimacy.

Couples counselling is an opportunity for two people to re-learn the art of communication and the art of love. There are several homework assignments that I use as well as cognitive strategies. I work with couples to find the value in the others actions: how do you know you are loved without hearing words. Over time there can be an erosion in respect. We work to knit the rift together again and rejoin in a united belief of their relationship.