Great Couples Counselling in West Point Grey, BC. Therapy to heal relationships.

In times of conflict we feel attacked and unsafe. We are flooded with emotions and act out of a sense of being overwhelmed: "Attack," "Run!" "Comply!" and "Hide!" are some of the ways we respond to conflict. In counselling, couples learn to see themselves as separate from each other and therefore less threatened. Once the emotional storm is diffused, couples can learn specific skills and perspectives that heal the relationship. But we do not seek simply to return to the status quo. Couples can then learn to hear, value and enjoy each other. Life with your partner can be fun and every day a day of discovering the pleasure of the person you are with.

Relational conflict can take a hug toll on your mental health, and on your children. Maybe your starting out in a relationship and want to get started on the right foot, or perhaps you're ready to call it quits but want to give it one last try. Wherever you're at I can help you and you're partner identify where you're getting stuck, and teach you the skills to find a path forward. I use Relational Life Therapy to help couples. A ground-breaking new approach to couples therapy that that is wildly effective and much faster than traditional approaches. I'll help you communicate as equals on the same playing field, teaching you the skills of relational empowerment that have transformed my life.

Are you and your partner stuck in unsolvable arguments? Does one of you tend to ‘demand’ more while the other shuts down and withdraws? Are you feeling less connected and actually adding stress to each other’s lives instead of reducing it? While frustrating, these are perfectly normal patterns of partnership and there is hope. I would be glad to help you untangle the knots, learning to team up together instead of entering battles over who is right. In doing so, we will unpack past traumas and patterns of behaviour, learning to better communicate and to be safely vulnerable in a way that stands your relationship on solid ground.

Is telephone counseling possible with couples? Usually face to face couple counseling is preferable but in reality it is not always possible. Couples that I have worked with either have lived in different locations or like many couples with children, have no free time until the children are put to sleep. 9:00 PM on the east coast is only 6:00 PM on the Pacific coast where I am located. If both partners are motivated and feel comfortable on the phone, then telephone counseling can be very helpful. Couples counseling is often centered on improving communication which can easily be addressed through telephone counseling.

I use the Gottman method to help couples work through their marital concerns to establish a friendship, nurture a stronger emotional bond, find shared meaning, and learn skills for conflict resolution. Couples typically engage in therapy to strengthen their connection, cope with crisis situations, and improve communication. I work with partners to instill a sense of understanding by breaking unhealthy patterns of communication and behaviours that may be showing up due to earlier experiences. Couples are provided with the opportunity to navigate through difficult relational dynamics to achieve happiness, fulfillment, and satisfaction in their relationship.

With training in the Gottman method, we work with couples helping them find new ways of repairing their relationship, and shifting their mindset to better understand each other’s needs. We work from a strength-based approach, providing insight into the relationship. We work with the couple to better understand each other and live in a relationship where they feel valued and strong.

My Approach to Couples Counselling includes - Providing you the tools for: Resolving Conflict and misunderstandings Effective problem solving Healthy ways to listen, talk and be heard Have a win-win relationship Moving past anger, resentment and bitterness Successfully changing self defeating behaviours Explore how your past affects your relationship/s Discover new ways to assist your life, It’s not just about your relationship, it’s also about you by building: Self-Esteem Love Intimacy Self worth Confidence Value Discovering how your personal past and baggage affect you Understanding what you need and your partner needs in a relationship And much more. Call now 604.290.1336

Relationships are essential for living a heathy life. Human brains are hard wired for love and connection, and as such, when relational issues surface life may become a challenge. Conflict, however, is a natural part of life. Relationships typically move from harmony, to disharmony to repair. It is the repair of the rupture in relational issues that is essential. Learning to communicate with respect and transparency is key. Using tools such as Non-Violent Communication, The Feedback Wheel the 5 Losing Strategies are valuable sills to learn for developing healthy ways of communicating with others.