Great Couples Counselling in Bowen Island, BC. Therapy to heal relationships.

What are the most common couples' issues? If you are thinking "communication, conflict, sex, money, child rearing" you are correct. However, most therapists will go after the symptom on each side of the couple fence thinking that the way to effective change is by getting each party to "work" on their respective "issue". Many times the parties don’t agree but comply. Imagine if you could align the unconscious brains of a couple and stop the "working on your issues" part that has become so popular in therapy settings? Contact kevin@kevinflemingphd.com to learn how! Or call 877-606-6161. DR. FLEMING'S NEW RELATIONSHIP/COUPLES INTENSIVES. www.kevinflemingphd.com/marriage-couples-retreats.php

It can be extremely difficult when we are experiencing issues in our closest relationships. Thankfully, a lot of these issues come down to communication skills that can be learned. When using active listening skills, you can begin to create a fuller understanding of your partner(s). We can also work on skills to express your own needs and desires in an effective way, using Non-Violent Communication tools. More often than not, we become frustrated when we don’t feel understood, but the reality is that we are not communicating properly, and our partners are not mind-readers, as much as we would like them to be (sometimes). Together we can create a more stable, loving foundation to grow from.

The research around attachment tells us that having a sense of closeness with others is essential to our well-being. When partners feel a lack of connection, it can touch on past wounds that may even exacerbate the present difficulties. All couples go through challenging times, and it is important that both individuals remain allies, even through trouble. Skilled couples counselling can support this, and help the relationship become stronger than ever before. I draw from a number of approaches when working with couples, especially Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy, Solution Focused Brief Therapy, and communication approaches such as Non Violent Communication.

The Gottman Method helps couples break out of painful cycles by applying research from over 3,000 couples—studying both those who thrive and those who divorce—to identify what makes relationships work. In Gottman couples therapy, we'll identify patterns eroding your intimacy—like criticism, defensiveness, or stonewalling—and replace them with healthier ways of relating. You'll learn practical, evidence-based skills for expressing needs, listening deeply, navigating conflict constructively, and repairing hurt. Whether experiencing frequent arguments, feeling disconnected, or facing major challenges, you'll gain concrete tools to rebuild connection, taking your relationship on a new trajectory

Sue Johnson teaches in her emotion focussed therapy that there is a specific emotional process - a dance - that occurs between each couple. This cycle of relating (which can start with not getting one’s needs met and be followed by some protective response, for example), is largely informed by each partner’s early attachment wounds. When our relationship does not offer enough safety to be vulnerable, or when the more honest we are with our partner the more our connection is threatened, it’s time to reach out for support. In couples therapy we work to establish safety, vulnerability and connection, as well as learn the practical skills of effective communication and conflict resolution.

If you're looking to improve your relationship, we'd work together to create a supportive environment for discussion, allowing each of you to share your perspective and experience. With important conversations and empathetic questions, there's opportunity to truly see each other and to collaborate to resolve the issues rather than engaging in blame. Together, we'd uncover experiences that promote mutual understanding, empathy and appreciation. Through this process you'll gain insights, develop new ways of communicating, strengthen your connection and establish a more fulfilling and harmonious relationship.

Many couples struggle with communication and "feeling heard". Over time a once happy and vibrant relationship can begin to decay through hurt feelings, anger, lack of attention, feeling valued, infidelity, the strain of children, childhood issues, and much more. We focus to heal the wounds of the past and rebuild the love and trust within the relationship. We work to equip both partners with a voice and ability to effectively listen and hear one another. We will work together to establish individual boundaries within the relationship, while creating a stronger and healthier connection. Our goal is to equip each couple with the tools they require for success, independent of counselling

In my work with individuals, I have noticed folks come to therapy because of challenges in their relationships. I draw on the Gottman Method which focuses on helping folks build stronger emotional connections, improve communication, and manage conflict effectively. We work on strengthening the "friendship system" of the relationship, which includes trust, intimacy, and mutual respect, while also addressing deeper issues like shared goals and values. By using practical tools and exercises, the Gottman Method helps people foster a sense of understanding and partnership, creating a foundation for a more fulfilling and resilient relationship.

Are you and your partner stuck in unsolvable arguments? Does one of you tend to ‘demand’ more while the other shuts down and withdraws? Are you feeling less connected and actually adding stress to each other’s lives instead of reducing it? While frustrating, these are perfectly normal patterns of partnership and there is hope. I would be glad to help you untangle the knots, learning to team up together instead of entering battles over who is right. In doing so, we will unpack past traumas and patterns of behaviour, learning to better communicate and to be safely vulnerable in a way that stands your relationship on solid ground.

Couples therapy with me offers a safe, respectful space to untangle conflict, rebuild connection and strengthen your relationship. Whether you're struggling with communication, trust, or feeling distant, we'll work together to understand what's beneath the surface and create new ways of relating. I support both partners with compassion and curiousity, helping you feel heard and valued. Through honest conversation and practical tools, you can move from stuck patterns toward deeper intimacy, understanding and shared growth -- one conversation at a time.

Couples counselling offers a safe environment in order to begin the process of making decisions for the future of your relationship. Many people often find it easier to say the things that they need to in front of a counsellor. Sometimes it is impossible to step back from the problems in the relationship with a view of moving forward when you are embroiled in turmoil. Having an objective helper in the room can allow each party to release themselves for healing and growth. Whether you have a specific problem or are just feeling disconnected, counselling can help.

Is telephone counseling possible with couples? Usually face to face couple counseling is preferable but in reality it is not always possible. Couples that I have worked with either have lived in different locations or like many couples with children, have no free time until the children are put to sleep. 9:00 PM on the east coast is only 6:00 PM on the Pacific coast where I am located. If both partners are motivated and feel comfortable on the phone, then telephone counseling can be very helpful. Couples counseling is often centered on improving communication which can easily be addressed through telephone counseling.

My approach to couples counselling integrates Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) and Gottman Method principles to create a balanced, supportive, and practical path toward change. I help partners slow down, understand the emotions and attachment needs driving their conflict, and reshape negative cycles into moments of connection. At the same time, I offer clear, evidence-based tools for communication, repair, and strengthening of your relationship. Clients benefit from a space that feels structured yet compassionate—where they can safely explore their patterns, learn new skills, and build a more secure, intimate, and resilient bond.

In times of conflict we feel attacked and unsafe. We are flooded with emotions and act out of a sense of being overwhelmed: "Attack," "Run!" "Comply!" and "Hide!" are some of the ways we respond to conflict. In counselling, couples learn to see themselves as separate from each other and therefore less threatened. Once the emotional storm is diffused, couples can learn specific skills and perspectives that heal the relationship. But we do not seek simply to return to the status quo. Couples can then learn to hear, value and enjoy each other. Life with your partner can be fun and every day a day of discovering the pleasure of the person you are with.

Real Solutions to Real Challenges. Common Sense Techniques. Short-term & Cost Effective. All couples are exposed to challenges such as; traumas, accidents, sickness, infidelities, job loss, grief, and unproductive communication cycles. Individuals histories contain our unique interpretation of ourselves and our world and how we currently cope and function. Understanding more about our selves, recognizing unfulfilled intentions, and discharging umcomfortable feeling will produce greater self-acceptance and communion/ imtimacy with our partners

I use the Intimacy From the Inside Out framework for couples therapy. This approach focuses on helping individuals and couples explore their internal worlds—their emotional needs, fears, desires, and vulnerabilities—in a way that fosters more authentic and fulfilling connections with one another. "Inside Out" refers to looking inward and understanding how your inner world influences your behavior, actions, and reactions in the relationship. This includes examining your emotional patterns, past experiences, and unmet needs that shape how you engage with your partner.

I have extensive experience in working with parents and their child or youth on a wide variety of issues. For example: dropping grades, school absenteeism, communication breakdown, anger issues, control and power, oppositional communication, self-esteem difficulties, and self-harming behaviours. I specialize in helping parents better understand their child/youth and youth better understand their responsibilities. My goal is to help child/youth and parents have better communication in order to live happier and healthier lives. I look forward to working with you and your child or teen.

Relationships are a crucial component of human health and happiness, and my passion involves helping people develop better connections with others as well as with themselves. By offering a setting that is based on trust, empathy, and collaboration, counselling can provide you with a safe and supportive space to explore your thoughts and emotions while creating a deeper, more authentic understanding of who you are, what you need, and the dynamics that you are navigating. Whether you attend alone or with a partner, I believe that there can be great value in processing relationships from the past or present as well as exploring the relationship that you're maintaining with yourself.

I work with couples using Gottman Therapy, Emotionally Focused Therapy and Attachment Therapy. I will help you identify your maladaptive patterns of behaviour and improve your communication skills. There is no shame in getting some coaching in how we connect with each other and how we can better meet each others needs. I use a strengths based approach to help you see the positives and remember why you fell in love.

I have extensive experience in marriage and couple therapy. In any relationship, both people play a role in the problems and concerns, and it take two to find solutions. I work with couple dealing with communication issues, fidelity, divorce and separation, co-parenting and commitment issues. I promote mutual support, and a collaborative approach to problem solving which builds trust in the couple and the counselling process. I help couples move through the old, repetitive cycles of arguing towards new and healthier communication and connection.

I welcome the opportunity to work with couples, whether married or not, LGBTQ, coupling or uncoupling. My goal is for partners to become more curious about themselves and about each other. We explore how unfinished business in one's family of origin and past trauma can affect emotional initmacy between partners. We will address ways of lessening emotional reactivity in order to work on relationship issues in a calm and respectful way.

Most couples get stuck at some point in their relationship. Intimacy is challenging for most us! I have a 2 pronged approach: I teach communication and conflict resolution skills as well as going deeper to discover the driving forces which lead to conflict. Conflict, once resolved, can lead to greater intimacy. The struggles you are facing now are the key to future deeper happiness and fulfillment and an opportunity for growth. I work with all types of couples.

I use the Gottman method to help couples work through their marital concerns to establish a friendship, nurture a stronger emotional bond, find shared meaning, and learn skills for conflict resolution. Couples typically engage in therapy to strengthen their connection, cope with crisis situations, and improve communication. I work with partners to instill a sense of understanding by breaking unhealthy patterns of communication and behaviours that may be showing up due to earlier experiences. Couples are provided with the opportunity to navigate through difficult relational dynamics to achieve happiness, fulfillment, and satisfaction in their relationship.

Relationships can become tense, defensive, and hostile. Sometimes, ruptures in trust occur that leave us questioning "should I still be with you?" When our relationships feel insecure, we react often through becoming critical/nagging, or shutting down and checking out. I practice a form of evidence-based couples therapy called Emotion-Focused Therapy for Couples (EFT). Through EFT, we identify the negative cycle that has come to define your relationship, and work to repair this ruptured attachment bond, helping partners feel safer and freer around one another. This leads to improved intimacy, better communication, and a stronger emotional connection.

I'm a down-to-earth, client-centered counsellor that can bring new hope to you and new life to your relationships. I specialize in marriage and couples counselling. I'm trained in Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy and Gottman Couples Therapy. With over ten years of experience, I have the tools to get your relationship back on track. I also offer intensive therapy for highly distressed couples. I'm here and ready to listen with warmth, kindness and compassion, without any judgement or criticism.