Anger Management and Counseling in Culver City, CA.

Anger is very closely correlated to depression and is in fact one of its symptoms. When people get labeled as having "anger issues" I as a therapist suspect that there is some form of underlying depression and in most cases early childhood trauma. I use cognitive behavioral therapy, but I also use psycho-dynamic psychotherapy to get down to the root of the underlying reasons for the anger.

I do not believe in "anger management". Instead, I believe in being in control of your emotions - including anger. My clients discover how to be in control of their feelings of anger or rage - instead of the anger or rage controlling them. My clients discover how they can feel anger, but then choose more effective and productive ways of expressing themselves - in ways that no longer lead to regret or hurt - but rather in ways they feel proud and good about.

As a culture, we do not do well with healthy expressions of anger. Often we are raised to suppress it and then we have limited practice at dealing with big emotion. There is a spectrum of healthy aggression- to keep us safe and to maintain boundaries- and rage- our body's strategy for safety. Anger management is about applying the right "dosing" to maintain boundaries yet not fracture relationships or suffer other losses. I am able to help you learn to regulate your body to be able to apply the appropriate "dose" to be effective and not destructive.

With a partner, I have developed a new and effective model of anger management that teaches you eight proven tools for anger control. These skill-based tools include; (1) reducing stress in your life, (2) developing empathy, (3)learning to respond instead of react, (4) changing self-talk, (5) communicating assertively, (6) adjusting expectations, (7) learning to forgive, and (8) retreating and thinking things over. These tools are taught to clients both in individual consultation and in anger management classes. They are also taught in online anger management programs I have produced.

A technique I use with Anger Management is Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT), which looks at our thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. Anger is a behavior that is an expression of our thoughts and feelings. I will work with you to help unlock the thoughts and feelings causing the anger. We can often correct negative thoughts that can help alter our feelings and behaviors. We can also look into other techniques to develop other coping mechanisms for anger. We resort to anger because that is what we were taught when we were younger. When you have other tools to express yourself and different thoughts, your anger isn't as necessary as often. You are still you. Just a calmer you.

I believe anger is a secondary emotion, covering other feelings such as grief, depression, anxiety, and/or hurt. Often times anger management is a signal for a need for trauma work, which can include explore prior experiences that felt stuck or emotionally taxing. Often times when others are angry, it's the only way they can feel heard-- having anger is not the problem, it's, what we do with the anger is what needs to be explored as appropriate or not.

Everybody gets angry. Anger is a human emotion which can serve both positive and negative ends which, in itself, is neutral. Frustration, fear, feeling threatened or treated unfairly can trigger an angry outburst in any animal. Anger is a normal human emotion. It can be an appropriate response to injustice, unfairness or discrimination. However, what we need to achieve is a way of expressing anger that is reasonable, measured and proportionate. Cognitive behavioral therapy provides one of many possible answers to managing anger. Feelings are often created by our thoughts and examining our thought processes to see if they are reasonable and rational can help us with emotional regulation.

Anger is a common issue when you were raised by someone who was angry or you have trauma that causes your fear and anger to be easily triggered. I help you determine the root causes of your anger and treat both the symptom of anger and the root cause to maximize your success at overcoming anger! I also use proven anger management techniques in addition to holistic treatments for trauma, relationship problems, parenting, etc. I offer an individualized, holistic and creative approach to working with your anger issues. Call me! I can help!

Grey Matters International and the work of Kevin J. Fleming, Ph.D approaches issues of anger management in a very humane yet fresh perspective. You see, anger is a normal emotion but it is the valence (intensity) as well as the coupling choice of what one does with this that is the problem. Telling someone to "not" do it or modifying behavior with a trite psychological plan that only breeds a compliant response is not the way to change anger. Brainwaive optimization is a new cutting edge technology that allows one to rewire circuitry responsible for reactivity driving the anger. Contact Grey Matters International, Inc now at kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161

Most of us have some relationship to anger. In a world that is capable of sudden cruelty and profound injustice, anger can be a powerful ally, helping us to take action that leads to real change. But anger can also try to take over our lives by tricking us into doing things we would rather not do, or getting ourselves into trouble. When anger arrives, we will face it together. Might we flip the script? Is it possible to take control of the relationship with anger, to interrogate it and unmask its motivations, its support, and its insidious methods of taking over?

Is your anger getting the best of you? Perhaps its ruining your relationship or compromising your ability to move up in your career. Maybe its just a feeling--you're always tense, stressed, worked up, you feel "on edge." Whatever your experience is, there is health to be had and hope to be found. Something in you knows there's got to be another way to live. Together, we'll explore what your anger is really about and develop strategies to get you feeling more healthy and whole so you can have the relationship with others you want to, the internal peace that people talk about, and the ability to move well through stressful situations.

Do you find that you are prone to angry outbursts in your relationships? Do you have a hard time with frustration tolerance? Through an empathic and collaborative approach, you will learn how to identify and understand your feelings and triggers, develop the capacity for frustration tolerance, and strengthen your coping skills so that your anger is no longer a destructive force in your life.

Consider anger a socially acceptable mask that we wear to protect ourselves from more vulnerable feelings. It’s easier to show anger than hurt feelings. The way I work with anger is to explore what’s fueling the anger, what’s underneath it. Once the underlying feelings are identified and acknowledged, the anger becomes less intense and more manageable. I also use a somatic approach to anger, using physiological cues to recognize it before it grows out of control.