Anger Management and Counseling in Live Oak, CA.

Are you plagued by sudden anger outbursts or rages that seem to emerge out of the blue, or that seem out of proportion with what triggered them? Are you puzzled by this behavior, and do you want to find a different way in handling difficult situations, or the unavoidable relational conflicts? I offer a nonjudgmental and safe space where I can help you explore your anger, or inexplicable outbursts. Are you ready for a change, and do you want to invest some time in coming to terms with your anger? I would be honored and very interested in working with you.

Grey Matters International and the work of Kevin J. Fleming, Ph.D approaches issues of anger management in a very humane yet fresh perspective. You see, anger is a normal emotion but it is the valence (intensity) as well as the coupling choice of what one does with this that is the problem. Telling someone to "not" do it or modifying behavior with a trite psychological plan that only breeds a compliant response is not the way to change anger. Brainwave optimization is a new cutting edge technology that allows one to rewire circuitry responsible for reactivity driving the anger. Contact Grey Matters International, Inc now at kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161.

I treat individuals with histories of trauma. Many adults walk away from abusive childhoods and find themselves acting in angry ways as adults. Anger is only a way that people cope with hardship, and we will work together to learn better ways to cope. Anger is only a symptom-- it does not define you. Anger can mask fear, anxiety, and insecurity. We will work together to find the true underlying issues causing anger. With hard work, you may see the anger melt away over time. I feel our society sees anger as a dirty or shameful part of our mental health, but this must change. You will not be treated poorly in my practice if you are making the effort to learn to cope better!

As a culture, we do not do well with healthy expressions of anger. Often we are raised to suppress it and then we have limited practice at dealing with big emotion. There is a spectrum of healthy aggression- to keep us safe and to maintain boundaries- and rage- our body's strategy for safety. Anger management is about applying the right "dosing" to maintain boundaries yet not fracture relationships or suffer other losses. I am able to help you learn to regulate your body to be able to apply the appropriate "dose" to be effective and not destructive.

I aim to help my clients gain a better understanding of their emotions and how to manage them. My practice specializes in anger management and provides tools and techniques to help people maintain stable emotions, stronger relationships, and better communication. I also offer psychoanalytically informed counseling, which helps clients gain insight into their unconscious thoughts and behavior. With my understanding of the human mind, I am able to provide my clients with the support they need to make positive changes in their lives.

I do not believe in "anger management". Instead, I believe in being in control of your emotions - including anger. My clients discover how to be in control of their feelings of anger or rage - instead of the anger or rage controlling them. My clients discover how they can feel anger, but then choose more effective and productive ways of expressing themselves - in ways that no longer lead to regret or hurt - but rather in ways they feel proud and good about.

Are you at risk of losing your job or your partner because of your anger? Is your family afraid of you because you seem out of control? Has your anger led to violence or arrests? Anger is a valid emotion that has a bad reputation because of the way it can be expressed. Learn to understand your own anger as well as coping skills that can help you feel more in control. And get to root of your anger. Anger is a complicated emotion that is often protective of a more vulnerable emotion or side of yourself, i.e., fear or sadness. As you learn the skills of self support, you can get your needs met while feeling more in control of yourself and the way you interact with your world as well.

Anger is never a first feeling, something always precedes it. After hearing what makes you angry, we search to find out what the first feeling might have been. Often it is fear or hurt. When we know the source it is much easier to address the rage/frustration. I teach my clients how to express strong feelings without blowing up. There is hope for you.