Anger Management and Counseling in Santa Rosa, CA.

Anger is a basic or primal emotion that is closley linked to the fight or flight response. So at its best, anger is there to protect you or a loved one. However, when anger is triggerred to easily, erupts inapropriatley, affects important personal or occupational relationships, then it is time to learn a new way of addressing your anger. I can help you learn better ways of communicating when you are angry that do not lead to destructive outbursts. I can also help you look underneath the anger to other issues and feelings that may be present. Some people get angry because it is a familiar feeling when really they are feelilng scared or sad. I can help you identify underling issues.

As a culture, we do not do well with healthy expressions of anger. Often we are raised to suppress it and then we have limited practice at dealing with big emotion. There is a spectrum of healthy aggression- to keep us safe and to maintain boundaries- and rage- our body's strategy for safety. Anger management is about applying the right "dosing" to maintain boundaries yet not fracture relationships or suffer other losses. I am able to help you learn to regulate your body to be able to apply the appropriate "dose" to be effective and not destructive.

I help people struggling with anger management by working with them to develop awareness of their anger experience in their body and mind and how it is impacting their body. I help you learn and practice strategies for regulating your body and mind so you do not lose control of the anger. I help you to learn healthy communication of anger, and the development of conflict resolution skills. I support you in exploring issues of transference from past relationships and experiences that may be contributing to your strong feelings of anger in present circumstances and relationships. We create safety, increase positive expression of anger, and reduce or eliminate sources of anger when possible!

Grey Matters International and the work of Kevin J. Fleming, Ph.D approaches issues of anger management in a very humane yet fresh perspective. You see, anger is a normal emotion but it is the valence (intensity) as well as the coupling choice of what one does with this that is the problem. Telling someone to "not" do it or modifying behavior with a trite psychological plan that only breeds a compliant response is not the way to change anger. Brainwave optimization is a new cutting edge technology that allows one to rewire circuitry responsible for reactivity driving the anger. Contact Grey Matters International, Inc now at kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161.

Volatile, out-of-control anger can destroy so much of what you love. The necessary first step with destructive anger is to become sensitive to when and how it arises which allows you to employ well-practiced self-regulation strategies to divert the destructive explosion. My therapeutic domain is to help you with the equally necessary second step of anger work. The only way that you can ultimately resolve the anger problem in your life is to go to the hurt underneath the anger, which is the root cause. I provide a safe container and steady, empathic guidance as we move together to experience the depth and the texture of rich emotional energy that has been mis-directed through angry explosion.