Grief and Loss Counseling in Santa Rosa, CA.

The loss of someone we love or something that is central to our lives is one of the most painful experiences that we can have. We enter a vortex called grief that colors everything and seems like it will never relent. The torn places in us where our missing and longing meet absence feel jagged and raw. The journey to acceptance and relief is best done in the company of others. Family and friends are good but an experienced, mature, warmly compassionate and skilled guide can help you over the rough patches. This is who I am. I can help you.

Grief and loss is a part of so much more than many recognize in every day life. Most folks are familiar with the Kubler-Ross stages, but processing grief is much more than those five stages. There are tasks of mourning that can be explored and expanded with support in therapy. There are secondary losses as a result of an initial loss. Grief impacts how open we feel to new relationships in our lives. I work with clients to help them understand their responses to grief, move through their grief and feelings through expressive arts and verbal processing.

I help clients navigate grief and loss by welcoming their deep feelings as a part of the process and navigating them carefully when they become overwhelming. Grief is a growth process like other difficult experiences, and I help clients find the resilience inside themselves to both honor their loss while getting stronger. By honoring the pain of the loss, we can move into a new phase of life that allows for thriving.

When we lose someone we love, it feels like we have lost a part of ourselves. Something within us has been torn out, leaving a hole that we easily imagine will never heal. The pain can be profound, the feelings of helplessness, or regret, or guilt overwhelming. Having a partnership where you can talk through these feelings can make a huge difference not only in how quickly and how well you are able to move through the process of grieving, but also how you ultimately are able to frame the experience and your memories of the person lost into the narrative of your own self and life as you move forward. What you carry with you afterward is just as important as surviving the hurt of the loss.

Grey Matters International and the work of Kevin J. Fleming, Ph.D approaches issues of grief & loss through the lens of innovation----instead of growing the same neural networks responsible for the pain in weekly therapy sessions, we reset the brain to move forward quicker and efficiently by working on the stuck limbic system so as to empower the person with more success and traction. For no one wants to stay in a grief mode for too long; but when you don’t include the brain in your work with someone, you risk describing the water to them while they drown and calling it success. Contact Grey Matters International, Inc now at kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161.

Grief work, including complex grief has become a specialty for me. One thing I have learned from my studies of Carl Jung and Sandra Ingerman is the importance of honoring your soul when you are grieving. I will hold the safe space for you to actively move through your grief so that you don't end up with depression or soul loss. Grief is often an initiation into sacred grounds where you come to understand your own soul and its needs. I am always honored to guide a client through their grief, for it can be a spiritual invocation, a catalyst for coming into more authenticity and self love. I offer gentle processes for complex grief, forgiveness work and creating healthy closure.

In our culture, we put a time cap on how long someone is allowed to grieve. We aren't taught how to grieve. Grief is not linear. It moves in circles, overtaking us and then receding, as we slowly heal. I have experienced much loss in my life and I draw on my experiences to help others grieve exactly as they need to, in their own way.

Grief can be a difficulty beast to manage, a beast which can surface at any moment without warning and often comes in waves. When I’ve been grieving I’ve felt like I was in an emotional pong ball. With the aid of tools like EMDR CBT and guided visualizations I can help you to heal and leave the pain, loss, and grief in the past while holding on to the happy memories. Additionally, I can provide tools, coping skills, and other resources to help you manage this particular issue.

Grief is a normal human experience that can feel abnormal when we are going through it. Some days may be sad days and some days may be fine. Sometimes humans feel grief over the loss of a loved one and sometimes grief can happen over the death of someone that may have been harmful. All are normal and you are normal for feeling those things. Asking for help during this time is a good thing. Send me a message so we can get you feeling better, faster.

Grief and loss are some of the most difficult of concerns. Yet our grief is a natural reaction to having lost something or someone that was important or invaluable to us. I help individuals and couples focus in on unresolved grief/loss issues, to honor the memories while learning to move on with your life. As a result of my approach, you can learn to live with your loss, move on with your life, while honoring cherished memories.