Family Counseling Services in Maywood, NJ.

ADULTS . IN-LAW ISSUES. BLENDED FAMILIES. EXTENDED FAMILY When family relationships fracture — whether between siblings, parents and grown children, or in-laws drawn into a couple's orbit — the pain runs deep. I help adult family members address long-standing resentments, miscommunications, and shifting roles that create distance. Sessions focus on uncovering what each person actually needs from the other and developing practical ways to relate without repeating old wounds. Families regain function when members stop reacting to history and start responding to the present. Connection between relatives can be restored when honesty replaces

We are part of something larger than ourselves and that is why we tend to encounter difficulties in dealing with simple things in life such as learning how to live together, raising children or coping with adolescence. In Family Therapy, as opposed to Individual Therapy, we explore, understand and address issues family members present at their source. Emotional origins of personal conflicts get exposed throughout roles and dynamics; part of my work with families include to question and re-frame them to mobilize stagnation and create room for new experiences.

Originally trained as a family therapist at the Family Institute of Cambridge, Mass., I have evolved as an experienced family therapist. I believe that family therapy is generally the treatment of choice in resolving issues and preventing the problem from going to the next generation. It is useful to see an entire family but can also be beneficial if parts of a family will work together to overcome communication problems, resentments, and misunderstandings that can tear families apart. Family therapy is very helpful to resolving conflicts of adult children after a parent has died. It can also be useful with young children, siblings, as well as teenagers, middle-aged people and older adults.

Families who come to Emerge redefine their goals individually and as a family unit. They gain an understanding of where their feelings and behaviors stem from and what they need to change. Within a matter of months families begin to see the growth and change that once was stagnant because they have now learned to communicate with one another through effective listening and reflective responding.

My approach to family therapy is to look for the source of the family conflict. After over 37 years of practice, I can usually zero in on what is going on. Sometimes one parent is out of control. Sometimes parents are in conflict over child-rearing practices; one is too permissive and one too strict. Sometimes one child is favored over another. I generally meet with the whole family over a period of time, encouraging honest and constructive communication. Through patient guidance, the problems surface and are worked out.

Family therapy will include working together to help improve communication, handle difficult conversations, making changes in dynamics, discuss life transitions that can impact others. Utilizing a Family Systems approach will take place in sessions. Formulating individual and family goals will be explored and a plan of action will take place with concrete goals.

I always include parent(s) in all sessions so they can learn how to bring out the best in their children. I reach, teach, educate and motivate children to value and respect their parents. When children show gratitude not attitude it is much easier for parents to praise and show love rather than yelling, punishing, and restricting their children. The resulting harmonious relations improve the atmosphere of the entire household and the benefits extend to siblings.

Individuals can learn about how their family dynamics impacted life experiences and shaped thoughts and belief systems. Clients can begin healing from emotionally immature parents and learn emotion regulation and distress tolerance skills to navigate emotional experiences and relationship. Clients can recognize patterns within relationships and learn how to cultivate healthier relationships.

Family therapy looks at the entire family system—parents, children, extended family members—to identify strengths and problematic behaviours. I collaborate with families on strategies for utilizing their own capabilities for resolving problems, and on developing effective communication and problem-solving skills for preventing conflicts. I specialize in working with families of teenagers, which is an age that can be challenging for both the teenagers and their parents.

I teach family members a skill called the Intentional Dialogue to help improve family communication. Often family members don't feel heard, that what they say matters, understood and that others know what they are feeling. The Intentional Dialogue allows each family member to share their 'side of the story' in a safe environment without fearing being judged or criticized. When this happens family members start to work as a team rather than be adversarial.

Family can be a wonderful source of strength and love, but the dynamism of so many individuals and their own needs and desires can also create different and new challenges. My goal as a therapist that works with both individuals and couples is to help you understand your family dynamics and needs so that I can provide you with the tools and techniques to thrive within your family life as it is now.

Most family therapists inadvertently create more chaos through their well-intentioned efforts to assist a family move through a change process. Why? Brains are inherently dysregulated (all of us, may I add) and most talking and dialoguing misses brain-centric problems that need more intensive help. Many times the emotional trauma created by years of solving problems ineffectively can wreak havoc on the brain's parasympathetic nervous system, not ever giving the family a break from flight or fight thinking. Contact us for an innovative neuroscience solution to family dystunction. Kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161

Kids live in the context of their families, and I believe that when you work with kids, the family should be included because this is the best way to create change. As parents, you are the most important people in your children's lives, and I want to strengthen your connections with them. It is important to look at the cycles that families get into, and also to understand what prevents communication between kids and their parents. The therapy is tailored to the needs of your family, so who is present in each session may vary. I want to support individuals as well as restore and improve the connection between parents and their children. This also applies to adult children and their parents.