Family Counseling Services in New Milford, NJ.

My approach to family therapy is to look for the source of the family conflict. After over 37 years of practice, I can usually zero in on what is going on. Sometimes one parent is out of control. Sometimes parents are in conflict over child-rearing practices; one is too permissive and one too strict. Sometimes one child is favored over another. I generally meet with the whole family over a period of time, encouraging honest and constructive communication. Through patient guidance, the problems surface and are worked out.

I enjoy doing both family counseling. I get to know each member of the family individually and the family dynamic, and how each person perceives the presenting problem. I am careful not to take sides and blame any one family member. All deserve respect. I work to learn more and to help you be more curious about whatever problem you are coming to me to resolve.

Families can carry either unhealed wounds or trauma and/or may have unhealthy communication patterns. These issues can be significantly improved with family therapy. I create a safe space for all parties to share their feelings in a healthy way, without blame, focusing on their own personal experience. I then provide exercises and tools to help them gain understanding of one another and validate one another. This has often been markedly lacking and can be very healing to receive. We go back in time to understand how the current dynamic in the family developed and with that understanding, how it can be shifted into a healthier dynamic.

My approach to family therapy centers on strengthening communication, rebuilding trust, and helping each member understand their role within the family system, especially when addiction or compulsive behaviors have created strain or disconnection. I bring specialized knowledge of how substance use and behavioral addictions impact not just the individual, but the entire family dynamic. I use evidence-based strategies to address patterns such as enabling, conflict avoidance, or codependency, while promoting accountability and healthy boundaries. Families benefit from a supportive, structured environment where all voices are heard, skills are developed, and lasting change can take root.

Dr. Sara Mandelbaum and Dr. Joel Stukalin are expert consultants for short-term interventions with families, specifically related to child-rearing & blended family issues. They consult regularly with concerned parents and grandparents about family related issues that threaten the family health and integrity. Usually a few, comprehensive sessions with Dr. Joel or Dr. Sara lay the groundwork for a better understanding that leads to the resolution of family problems. Where necessary individulal counseling referrals can be made. Clients have stated that the focused, intelligent & solution-oriented approach from our sessions has often helped them derive necessary knowledge for family harmony

Family can be a wonderful source of strength and love, but the dynamism of so many individuals and their own needs and desires can also create different and new challenges. My goal as a therapist that works with both individuals and couples is to help you understand your family dynamics and needs so that I can provide you with the tools and techniques to thrive within your family life as it is now.

I teach family members a skill called the Intentional Dialogue to help improve family communication. Often family members don't feel heard, that what they say matters, understood and that others know what they are feeling. The Intentional Dialogue allows each family member to share their 'side of the story' in a safe environment without fearing being judged or criticized. When this happens family members start to work as a team rather than be adversarial.

Family therapy focuses on relationshipswithin the family unit, and takes place with other family members present. My approach is to work individual first, and then bring in the family together so we can work-out what is working or what is not working. Individual counseling works because we can first see if there are any personal issues first, then bring it to family sessions.

Our music therapists specialize in reaching children, teens, and young adults, including those with special needs like autism, ADHD, and Down's syndrome, as well as siblings of children with special needs who are working to identify their role or voice in the family. Individualized music exercises conducted by our highly trained therapists can address coping strategies, social skills, functional speech, and more!

Family dynamics are complicated, & when things break down it affects everyone, not just the people in the middle of the conflict. I work with families using Structural Family Therapy, Emotionally Focused Family Therapy, & Cognitive Behavioral Family Therapy to help identify what's really driving the tension, improve how you communicate, & build healthier patterns that actually stick. That means looking at roles, boundaries, thought patterns, & emotional bonds that hold your family together or pull it apart. Every member's perspective matters here. The goal isn't to assign blame or pick sides. It's to help your family function in a way that supports everyone in it, individually and together.

Nearly all families deal with some sort of stress or conflict at one point or another. In the middle of what can seem like the most difficult time for your family, actually lies opportunity. Through therapy, I can help family members begin to understand one another better, improve their communication, and resolve conflicts, leading to healthier and more secure relationships. Your family is the most powerful resource. Let’s strengthen it together.

Most family therapists inadvertently create more chaos through their well-intentioned efforts to assist a family move through a change process. Why? Brains are inherently deregulated (all of us, may I add) and most talking and dialoguing misses brain-centric problems that need more intensive help. Many times the emotional trauma created by years of solving problems ineffectively can wreak havoc on the brain's parasympathetic nervous system, not ever giving the family a break from flight or fight thinking. Contact us for an innovative neuroscience solution to family dysfunction. Kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161.

Helping couples and families with relationship issues, parenting, step and blended family issues. Also helping family going through loss, divorce, illness and coping with difficult and painful issues related to a child or other family member. Also help to strengthen family and couple communication with spouse, children, in-laws and other family members.