Family Counseling Services in Upper Montclair, NJ.

My approach to family therapy centers on strengthening communication, rebuilding trust, and helping each member understand their role within the family system, especially when addiction or compulsive behaviors have created strain or disconnection. I bring specialized knowledge of how substance use and behavioral addictions impact not just the individual, but the entire family dynamic. I use evidence-based strategies to address patterns such as enabling, conflict avoidance, or codependency, while promoting accountability and healthy boundaries. Families benefit from a supportive, structured environment where all voices are heard, skills are developed, and lasting change can take root.

I enjoy doing both family counseling. I get to know each member of the family individually and the family dynamic, and how each person perceives the presenting problem. I am careful not to take sides and blame any one family member. All deserve respect. I work to learn more and to help you be more curious about whatever problem you are coming to me to resolve.

Nearly all families deal with some sort of stress or conflict at one point or another. In the middle of what can seem like the most difficult time for your family, actually lies opportunity. Through therapy, I can help family members begin to understand one another better, improve their communication, and resolve conflicts, leading to healthier and more secure relationships. Your family is the most powerful resource. Let’s strengthen it together.

Careers and children each place enormous stress on a couple’s ability to be together in an intimate and satisfying way. Every couple has different ways of dealing with the challenges, and counseling can provide the perspective and encouragement to re-create a shared vision for the future. For something as important as this, it is surprising how little training and preparation were given; family therapy fills in the blanks.

Family therapy looks at the entire family system—parents, children, extended family members—to identify strengths and problematic behaviours. I collaborate with families on strategies for utilizing their own capabilities for resolving problems, and on developing effective communication and problem-solving skills for preventing conflicts. I specialize in working with families of teenagers, which is an age that can be challenging for both the teenagers and their parents.

Families are the most important elements of society. We believe that healthy families form great communities. It all starts with the couple. We do intense couples and family therapy. Our relational skill building approach has helped many couples and families to reduce violence, conflict, miscommunication and anger at home. We are the only ones who give you a two-for-one treatment. We provide couples and family treatment along with anger management treatment at not extra cost.

Distressed family members too often exclusively focus their efforts on changing their difficult sibling, parent, grandparent or in-law. This is ineffective. Difficult family members often resist such efforts. I teach each family member how to first work on changing their own self-defeating emotional and behavioral reactions in response to their difficult family members. Once someone calms down and not gets so upset about the other people in their family they can influence other people to find better ways to live with or at least gracefully tolerate each other. I show each family member how to work on themselves in order to have a better chance of influencing others. Think about this.

Dr. Sara Mandelbaum and Dr. Joel Stukalin are expert consultants for short-term interventions with families, specifically related to child-rearing & blended family issues. They consult regularly with concerned parents and grandparents about family related issues that threaten the family health and integrity. Usually a few, comprehensive sessions with Dr. Joel or Dr. Sara lay the groundwork for a better understanding that leads to the resolution of family problems. Where necessary individulal counseling referrals can be made. Clients have stated that the focused, intelligent & solution-oriented approach from our sessions has often helped them derive necessary knowledge for family harmony

When a loved one has an addiction or alcohol problem, the whole family suffers. The impact may not be immediately evident, but it is there, festering and creating anger, resentment, insecurity and other emotional and often financial issues. Families often feel beat up by the addict and then beat up by the treatment centers, who offer addict focused education and minimal family treatment. Who is supporting you, the family, when your family weekend is over? You loved one is released from treatment with an aftercare plan. What is your aftercare plan? Living with a newly recovering person doesn’t have to mean walking on eggshells. Compassionate family focused education, coaching and therapy help families heal and create lives worth living.

Helping couples and families with relationship issues, parenting, step and blended family issues. Also helping family going through loss, divorce, illness and coping with difficult and painful issues related to a child or other family member. Also help to strengthen family and couple communication with spouse, children, in-laws and other family members.

Family can be a wonderful source of strength and love, but the dynamism of so many individuals and their own needs and desires can also create different and new challenges. My goal as a therapist that works with both individuals and couples is to help you understand your family dynamics and needs so that I can provide you with the tools and techniques to thrive within your family life as it is now.

During Family Therapy we deal with: patterns of communication (the way people in the family talk to each other); anger (how that sabotages the family); correcting dysfunctional patters, and negotiation (how to work out things so that everybody feels O.K. about the solutions). During family counseling families learn how to deal with crisis as well conflict management techniques. Also included are effective parenting skills for both children as well as teenagers. Therapy needs to have practical strategies and to be as short term as possible.

Most family therapists inadvertently create more chaos through their well-intentioned efforts to assist a family move through a change process. Why? Brains are inherently dysregulated (all of us, may I add) and most talking and dialoguing misses brain-centric problems that need more intensive help. Many times the emotional trauma created by years of solving problems ineffectively can wreak havoc on the brain's parasympathetic nervous system, not ever giving the family a break from flight or fight thinking. Contact us for an innovative neuroscience solution to family dystunction. Kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161